How the child was conceived and the parents' responsibility to support their child are two completely different things that cannot be intertwined and placed into any sort of law.
Believe me, I too have zero sympathy for women who use deceit to create a child that they personally want for reasons of their own. My husband is living, breathing proof of a young first-year university student, approached by an older woman (3 years older) one night at a bar, who took him back to her place for what seemed like a typical one-night-stand (drunk yet consenting)... only to have the condom break, her lie about being on the pill (when he asked whether she should look into getting the morning-after pill)... and nine months later, the money-grubbing began. Facilitating him access was none of her concern, ever, and still isn't. All that matters is how much money he can pay. The more, the better. Expenses for the most expensive things she could find, all "in the child's best interest." After all, he was working (part time, but still working) while she wasn't, so he was responsible for 100% of the expense! Heck, he even had to PAY to SEE his child during the first year. She wouldn't let him lay eyes on the baby unless he came bearing gifts (diapers, milk, clothing, whatever) on top of child support! And 7 years later, things aren't much better than they were in the beginning. And the worst part of it all, the court system has done nothing but turn a blind eye and even proclaimed all the extra payments to be "gifts" that cannot and will not be counted as overpayment or returned. I think THAT is what is sickening about the whole situation... fathers who, regardless of whether they wanted to be fathers or not, are trying to be responsible for their offspring, and instead are getting extorted by their babies' mothers and used as nothing more than a living, breathing ATM. It absolutely sickens me how much money my husband pays monthly for 1 child. He currently pays closer to the table amount for 2 children than for 1 child... on top of providing the child with a fully furnished room, toys, daycamps, activities, and every piece of clothing for every weather in our home. But to the courts, none of that matters. (Believe me, we've tried to make it matter.) Something should be done about THAT - not about who's responsible and in what circumstance.
Believe me, I too have zero sympathy for women who use deceit to create a child that they personally want for reasons of their own. My husband is living, breathing proof of a young first-year university student, approached by an older woman (3 years older) one night at a bar, who took him back to her place for what seemed like a typical one-night-stand (drunk yet consenting)... only to have the condom break, her lie about being on the pill (when he asked whether she should look into getting the morning-after pill)... and nine months later, the money-grubbing began. Facilitating him access was none of her concern, ever, and still isn't. All that matters is how much money he can pay. The more, the better. Expenses for the most expensive things she could find, all "in the child's best interest." After all, he was working (part time, but still working) while she wasn't, so he was responsible for 100% of the expense! Heck, he even had to PAY to SEE his child during the first year. She wouldn't let him lay eyes on the baby unless he came bearing gifts (diapers, milk, clothing, whatever) on top of child support! And 7 years later, things aren't much better than they were in the beginning. And the worst part of it all, the court system has done nothing but turn a blind eye and even proclaimed all the extra payments to be "gifts" that cannot and will not be counted as overpayment or returned. I think THAT is what is sickening about the whole situation... fathers who, regardless of whether they wanted to be fathers or not, are trying to be responsible for their offspring, and instead are getting extorted by their babies' mothers and used as nothing more than a living, breathing ATM. It absolutely sickens me how much money my husband pays monthly for 1 child. He currently pays closer to the table amount for 2 children than for 1 child... on top of providing the child with a fully furnished room, toys, daycamps, activities, and every piece of clothing for every weather in our home. But to the courts, none of that matters. (Believe me, we've tried to make it matter.) Something should be done about THAT - not about who's responsible and in what circumstance.
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