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Common Law Issues The law regarding common law relationships is different than in cases of divorce. Discuss the issues that affect unmarried couples here.

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  #1  
Old 07-30-2013, 01:48 PM
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Leviathan Leviathan is offline
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Ok, so the latest update?? The stbx's lawyer has served me with a motion stating the voluntary interim support $$ I've been sending the stbx, isn't enough.

The 18 year old daughter (which isn't biologically mine) has recently graduated hs (adult hs) to get the remainder of her credits. Apparently now, the daughter needs to go back to the adult hs to take some additional credits so she can attend local college.

To add to this, the daughter has recently come down with some health issues (which the drs can't determine) and the stbx's lawyer states this is the main reason that cs (or as my lawyer and i have stated...temporary interim support) should be increased!!

What now??? Any advice??
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Old 07-30-2013, 02:35 PM
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Do you have an order requiring you to pay anything for the adult daughter?
In the absence of an actual order, you should be paying support based on what you believe it the proper outcome.

If you do not believe the adult daughter should be supported, then you should not be paying ANYTHING for her.
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Old 07-30-2013, 03:18 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NBDad View Post
Do you have an order requiring you to pay anything for the adult daughter?
In the absence of an actual order, you should be paying support based on what you believe it the proper outcome.

If you do not believe the adult daughter should be supported, then you should not be paying ANYTHING for her.
No...no order at all. I don't believe I should be paying anything at all but because I filled the role of in loco parentis, I'm feeling I'm stuck in some sort of way.

This motion the stbx's lawyer put forward is asking for full cs based off the guidelines and my annual salary (naturally).

I'm guessing this motion will help decide this?? Does the judge actually thoroughly read both parties complaints before the motion?? Or does he/she skim threw them just before the court appearance??
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Old 07-30-2013, 04:38 PM
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They just skim through before the motion. If it is more than one page, not even that. You or your lawyer will have the chance to tell it verbally.
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Old 07-30-2013, 04:46 PM
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Remember the onus is on HER to prove in loco parentis. It's not an automatic assumption.

Until there is a signed order, interim or otherwise requiring you to do so, if you do not believe you should be paying for her...do not.

Ditto for spousal, without a signed order, pay nothing.

The ONLY exception to the "pay nothing" rule is for CS for a bio child. In which case, you should pay based on the expected outcome. (50-50, EOW, etc)

In that one exception, you should bank the difference between full table and what you are paying each month, JUST in case.
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Old 07-30-2013, 04:48 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BitHunter View Post
They just skim through before the motion. If it is more than one page, not even that. You or your lawyer will have the chance to tell it verbally.
Ok thanks bithunter...her motion (or papers that she's handed in fir this next appearance) are thicker than an encyclopedia!! It's insane...last time when we went to cc, they did the same...

My lawyer responded with half of what they handed in (for the cc) she did a super amazing job speaking directly to the judge who listened quite intently...turned out in our favour too

Why does everything need to be handed in several days before the court appearance then??
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Old 07-30-2013, 04:50 PM
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The fact that I had both her and her daughter on my health benefits, clearly puts me in a situation where I can't deny in loco, does it not??
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Old 07-30-2013, 05:09 PM
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Is that all they have? Dude...you can put kids on your benefits just to be smart financially, especially if it's a reasonable assumption that the kid may require things like glasses, ortho work, etc.

That's not being in loco, that's just not being stupid.

In loco would mean she has to prove things like the child considered you a father, called you Dad/etc.

That you were responsible for dolling out discipline or at least had input into it.

Things like the kid giving you father's day gifts, you taking time off of work while they are sick to help take care of them. Did you attend parent-teacher conferences? Did you coach any activities? THOSE are what will make or break your case.
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Old 07-30-2013, 05:25 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NBDad View Post
Is that all they have? Dude...you can put kids on your benefits just to be smart financially, especially if it's a reasonable assumption that the kid may require things like glasses, ortho work, etc.

That's not being in loco, that's just not being stupid.

In loco would mean she has to prove things like the child considered you a father, called you Dad/etc.

That you were responsible for dolling out discipline or at least had input into it.

Things like the kid giving you father's day gifts, you taking time off of work while they are sick to help take care of them. Did you attend parent-teacher conferences? Did you coach any activities? THOSE are what will make or break your case.
Yes I attended parent teacher interviews, disciplined, helped with homework, etc...I never denied any of that and still don't...the fact that she's finished hs and won't be attending any sort of schooling
This day forward is what's bugging me..the stbx claims the daughters gonna apply for college soon...we've asked for proof/enrollment and have received nothing.

Her lawyer states the daughter is too sick to attend school until she's better..we're awaiting a diagnosis which the dr already states there's nothing wrong with her.
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Old 07-31-2013, 01:06 PM
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Quote:
This day forward is what's bugging me..the stbx claims the daughters gonna apply for college soon...we've asked for proof/enrollment and have received nothing.

Her lawyer states the daughter is too sick to attend school until she's better..we're awaiting a diagnosis which the dr already states there's nothing wrong with her.
So until you get either of those things, don't pay a dime in CS for the stepdaughter. She is not in school full time, she's not working, and there is no disclosed reason that she is not able to do one of those two things.

If/when they are able to provide that information/proof, then you can reopen the topic. Until then, without a court order, I'd tell them to PFO and bank the amount you believe is fair. (Bio Dad is under court order to pay already is he not?)
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