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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #21  
Old 07-24-2010, 03:13 PM
standing on the sidelines standing on the sidelines is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MaksMom View Post
FACT: My ex called and threatened to kill me and our daughter. He was drunk. I called the police. They spoke to him, he threatened them, he was arrested.
FACT: They did NOT call CAS.

Just my two cents.
thanks for posting that. shows what actually happens
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  #22  
Old 07-24-2010, 04:02 PM
TRG2010 TRG2010 is offline
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Thats unfortunate and wrong. Here is direct from the police website that prooves what I have said, just for those who dont believe me. Page 2 point 5

http://www.ottawapolice.ca/en/servin...er_assault.pdf


The Children’s Aid Society of Ottawa will be notified when
children are present during a domestic violence incident.
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  #23  
Old 07-24-2010, 04:36 PM
standing on the sidelines standing on the sidelines is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TRG2010 View Post
Thats unfortunate and wrong. Here is direct from the police website that prooves what I have said, just for those who dont believe me. Page 2 point 5

http://www.ottawapolice.ca/en/servin...er_assault.pdf


The Children’s Aid Society of Ottawa will be notified when
children are present during a domestic violence incident.
sorry but that doesn't help. You said that he called and yelled at you. I think the website means when children are present when there is physical abuse.
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  #24  
Old 07-24-2010, 04:52 PM
Mess Mess is offline
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I am sure that you have received counselling and been told that verbal abuse is spousal abuse. I would never dispute that. However verbal abuse is not assault. Repeating something over and over doesn't make it true. The fact that your ex was nasty to you on the phone does not mean that he assaulted you.
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  #25  
Old 07-24-2010, 05:27 PM
TRG2010 TRG2010 is offline
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I never said it was assult, i said abuse - domestic violence. He was more than nasty Mess, why dont you understand that? Do you not believe that it is possible to abuse someone over the phone? it is still considered domestic violonce what he did, it was enough for the police to warrant an investigation and to call childrens aid. Why are you disputing that? He was more than nasty... This is what is dissapointing in this world, people dont understand or choose to ignore domestic violence/ spousal abuse or minimize it. Why do you (Mess) keep putting words in my mouth? I NEVER said he assulted me, why do you keep doing that?
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  #26  
Old 07-24-2010, 05:35 PM
standing on the sidelines standing on the sidelines is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TRG2010 View Post
I never said it was assult, i said abuse - domestic violence. He was more than nasty Mess, why dont you understand that? Do you not believe that it is possible to abuse someone over the phone? it is still considered domestic violonce what he did, it was enough for the police to warrant an investigation and to call childrens aid. Why are you disputing that? He was more than nasty... This is what is dissapointing in this world, people dont understand or choose to ignore domestic violence/ spousal abuse or minimize it. Why do you (Mess) keep putting words in my mouth? I NEVER said he assulted me, why do you keep doing that?
you had the choice to hang up the phone right away. To me domestic violence is when there is a physical altercation. What you suffered was verbal, mental abuse.

Last edited by standing on the sidelines; 07-24-2010 at 05:42 PM.
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  #27  
Old 07-24-2010, 05:49 PM
TRG2010 TRG2010 is offline
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I did, What do you people think? I answered the phone, I dont have call display. He caught me off guard, I kept camly repeating myself that she was not well and I would notify him later if she was better, he kept escillating and threatening I finally said goodbye twice with no answer from him, just a constant tirade before I hung up. I cant just hang up right away when its him, I have to listen at least so he cant go around and say that I hung up on him and didnt let him talk. You all do not know him and what he is capable of. He will twist anything I do (and he has) around to make it look like he is the victim. I am dealing with so much and I thought that this would be a safe environment to talk.

I really didnt think this was a forum where you have to constantly defend yourself.. I have done nothing wrong, yet I am being critisize and judged and having words put in my mouth.
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  #28  
Old 07-24-2010, 06:28 PM
standing on the sidelines standing on the sidelines is offline
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this is a safe enviroment to talk, but you cannot expect everyone to agree with you. You say you said good bye twice, why not just once and hang up. THERE IS NO LAW THAT SAYS YOU HAVE TO LISTEN TO HIS VERBAL ABUSE!!!! You can hang up the phone at anytime and who cares if he goes around telling people you hung up?? Yo have to start to grow a bit of a backbone when it comes to him. You do a good job of standing up for yourself here, so now it is time to start standing up for yourself when it comes to him. You can do it, you have proven that here.

Last edited by standing on the sidelines; 07-24-2010 at 06:28 PM. Reason: spelling
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  #29  
Old 07-24-2010, 07:27 PM
Mess Mess is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TRG2010 View Post
I never said it was assult, i said abuse - domestic violence.
Then why did you link to a web page about ASSAULT? We don't doubt that you have problems with him, but you are trying convince us of the fiction that the police are obligated to call the CAS because of verbal abuse over the telephone. Something the children wouldn't even have been able to hear, or even known about if you didn't tell them.

If he committed a criminal act, the police should have charged him. If they didn't, it wasn't assault, and the web page you posted a link to has nothing to do with your arguments.

And now you're trying to distract attention away from your bogus "proof" by saying we don't believe he was abusive to you. When did I say he wasn't abusive?
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  #30  
Old 07-24-2010, 07:33 PM
TRG2010 TRG2010 is offline
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I dont expect everyone to agree with me, just without the nastiness. I said it twice to give him the opportunity to respond, I did not want to have to hang up on him, I dont like being rude. I dont care if he tells other people, but he is telling his lawyer (that is what I ment before) and we are in the divorce process and my lawyer told me to be as nice as possible, which I am trying to do. So I can't really stand up to him right now either because of the whole lawyer thing. He has nothing on me, so he is trying(I feel) to set me off to do something to make me seam unstable. Trust me, this is a difficult situation and I hate it. I have stood up to him and for myself through out our whole farce of a marriage and I really dont want to do it anymore. I left him to find peace, if I stand up for myself it will create room for him to continue, I have tried standing up to him a few times already (email only), in the nicest possible way, and it still doesnt end well. Even if I keep it child oriented, somehow he gets personal jabs in there towards me. Judge said to try communicating through email only. He wasnt even supposed to call me. In his eyes I can do nothing right, and everythng is a fight, its really not worth standing up to anymore.
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