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  • #16
    [quote=dovan;19841] It is like inheritance, if you liquidate that amount into a joint account, purchase items with it that would be in the home where you both lived then it is no longer considered as yours but jointly owned.

    You obviously did not read this part of my first post to you....regardless of where the gift came from you liquidated it into a JOINT purchase with your ex. Thus making communal property. The laws for married spouse and the laws for common law spouses are different perhaps since you make it quite clear that you feel you are ENTITLED and your posting have clearly shown that you are unable to accept any assistance given to you by the many posts here that you go about doing your own research on the internet and maybe then you will realize that those who have responded to your question have either been there done and know that you are banging your head against the wall that or have experience themselves in this field.

    Sorry for being so blunt but I must agree with past posting you are acting childish and petty and vindicitive I may add.

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    • #17
      Why come on here and ask for advice and then refuse to accept it because it is not what you want to hear?

      Well here goes........ Take it as far as you can through the courts, don't give an inch, you are entitled to everything...... make him suffer...he deserves it!! Get yourself the most expensive lawyer you can find because they are the best!

      GOOD LUCK!

      Comment


      • #18
        to be fair sure you put up the 30 grand, but you would not have the house either because he was one working full time. As for the comparing him owing a car and the money you put on the house, totally different. Once you used the money to purchase a joint home, it became joint money unless you have an agreement with him before.

        You basically expect him to give you 40,000. Maybe you should offer to pay him back for the taxes, mortgage payments, the money he paid for home maintence and whatever else he shelled out on your behalf over the years. Isn't all the years he supported you count for anything in your eyes?? You seem to think that he should keep giving you money, but you do not owe him anything. I am sorry but in my eyes you are looking like a greedy gold digger.

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        • #19
          You can't get the 30,000 back.Though it was a gift to you but was used in the purchase of matrimonial home.So anything put towards the matrimonial home will be divided into half.
          Don't waste your money over your lawyer.As they keep themselves covered.The lawyer will never say WE WILL GET BACK THE DEPOSIT.HE will always say WE MIGHT BE ABLE TO GET IT BACK.

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          • #20
            The courts will not allow you to get the $30K back without some consideration of the excess amounts he paid into the ongoing maintenance of the home. You might get lucky, but I wouldn't bet on it.

            The courts want parties to settle on their own without having to decide for them. If you insist on taking this to court, you will almost certainly be viewed as unreasonable. Very early on, way before it gets even close to trial, you will p**s away (in legal fees) the money over which you disagree.

            If you are crazy enough to take it all the way to trial, which will costs tens and tens of thousands for EACH party, get ready for your ex to be awarded costs, meaning you will have the pleasure of paying for both of you. This is because if parties are so unable to settle their differences that a trial is required, and one is unreasonable, the judge will penalize that party for its stubborness.

            Listen to what are you being told above. Settle and move on. Or spend the next 2-3 years in emotional and financial turmoil while you live in the past.

            BTW, I'm not sure that most women are entitled to spousal support. You have really lit a fire here with that statement. Get back on your feet and build yourself a respectable living.
            Last edited by dadtotheend; 01-28-2009, 07:56 PM.

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            • #21
              Originally posted by copper View Post
              Why come on here and ask for advice and then refuse to accept it because it is not what you want to hear?

              Well here goes........ Take it as far as you can through the courts, don't give an inch, you are entitled to everything...... make him suffer...he deserves it!! Get yourself the most expensive lawyer you can find because they are the best!

              GOOD LUCK!
              good one. LOL

              Comment


              • #22
                I understand that most people are telling me to drop the 30K of my deposit.
                What about the spousal support though. Is it not true that most women do get spousal support. I have looked on canlii and i cant find a single case where spousal support was denied. It isnt just me it is alot of women get spousal support. Why are there so many cases of women getting support then, not just me. Even women without kids have received support on the canlii cases. There wasnt one case i found where the women was denied support. Obviously the family law courts feel women are entitled as they make less money. Even if i had a full time job, i wouldnt make as much as he did. That is a fact.

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                • #23
                  Your statement just goes to show what is wrong with the family law related to spousal support in this country! Where the emphasis is on GREED rather than NEED!!

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                  • #24
                    copper - the point is i do need support. I cannot afford to be on my own. Women do not make as much as men. That is a fact. I have friends that are women that work full time and they tell me they couldnt afford to live on their own. Rent, car expenses, fuel, food. It is to expensive to live in this province.

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                    • #25
                      My questions to you is what did you do before this man was in your life? How did you survive before? Just because other woman get spousal support does not mean that ever woman would.

                      He is a clip it from and article:
                      For common-law and same-sex partners, the Family Law Act provides that an individual may be responsible for the support of his or her ex-partner if the partners have a child together or if they have cohabited continuously for a period of not less than three years.

                      Both the Divorce Act (Canada) and the Family Law Act (Ontario) provide that married spouses are responsible for each other’s spousal support on separation in most circumstances when there is need and an ability to pay.

                      In both these acts it does not state you are automatically entitled to spousal support.

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                      • #26
                        Spousal Support is based on a number of variations. You would be best advised to read the updated SSAG's July 2008.

                        In its most basic form it comes down to:
                        Duration of marriage
                        Need of the recipient
                        Ability to pay (payor)

                        You will likely be awarded some form of support for a time limited duration.

                        The judge will want to know your employment history, reasons why you can't work fulltime, if you've put effort into becoming self sufficient, your ex's ability to pay etc...

                        I'm curious to know why you can't work full time? You have really put yourself out there to be criticized in this forum and I tend to agree. You have no children with this man, you can and do work, but you feel entitled to money?

                        I also take offence to the sexist nature of your argument. Personally, I wouldn't want to be supported by a man just because I can be. I'm a very proud woman and take full responsibility for myself and my future. I make a hell of a lot more than a lot of men out there. I don't need someone else's money to keep me in food and clothing...but...that's just me.

                        Yah, you'll probably get it. You already know that.
                        You are SOL on the 30k.

                        My advice, take the support that he will have to pay you and increase your skills through education so that when the gravy train ends, you will be able to stand on your own two feet.

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                        • #27
                          I am a woman with 2 children. I don't have spousal support, and I don't want it. I can have a life of my own.

                          Statements like yours are the reason ex's have such a bad reputation. Spend your energy finding yourself a good job instead of fighting for your ex's money.

                          We're in 2009, women can make enough money to sustain themselves.

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                          • #28
                            elizabeth1962 ~ I still want to know why you don't agree on the figure for spousal support, and therefore you want to argue it.
                            Why do you think it's unfair? He's gone ahead and put an offer for S.S on the table instead of waiting for you to take him to court to demand it.
                            If I were him I wouldn't have offered you any S.S. Doesn't the fact that he did so willingly count for anything?
                            Yes, you CAN go to court and ARGUE. Yes, by law you MAY be ENTITLED.
                            You MAY win, you MAY lose. No-one knows what the Judge will do.
                            YES, you will get a BIG bill from your lawyer.
                            You've got equity coming from the house, you're living at your Mom's, you choose to semi-support yourself w/ p/t work.
                            Alot of people would envy your situation and take the $ and run.

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                            • #29
                              The house has been sold and the money is sitting in trust with the lawyer...

                              I assume all mortgage and debt has been paid out. How much money is in trust at this point?

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                              • #30
                                There is currently 183 thousand sitting in trust. My lawyer told me not to release the money so we could bring him to the table for support.

                                Comment

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