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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #21  
Old 01-20-2020, 08:36 PM
MjD MjD is offline
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My ex continues to suspend my access when I work afternoons according to what's stated in the final order.

I would like dispute this in court and ask for additional access time.. Do I have a good case and would a judge disagree with these issues?
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  #22  
Old 01-20-2020, 09:09 PM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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Are you working during that time? Is this new since the agreement?

If you are working then she has the right as stated in the order.

If this is new and you have availability on other days then you would have to file a motion to change.

Your ex is not wrong on the work hours time. Your ex *may* be wrong in not allowing you make up time. If she isnt going to allow a change and you dont want to take the chance on court then you may have to look at the work schedule and see what you can do.
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  #23  
Old 01-20-2020, 09:21 PM
MjD MjD is offline
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She has been uncorportive so far.. 151 hrs of suspended access to date. I will give it another try. Unless she agrees I have no choice but to go back to court..

What are my chances of judge accommodating my afternoon schedule and request that weekends shall be switched.

Btw I have another point stating that parties shall work coportively when considering requests to alter the existing or regular time sharing pattern and shall be mindful family functions or obligations.
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  #24  
Old 01-20-2020, 09:47 PM
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The other clauses are moot. If you are working then the kid stays with mom. Period. You agreed to it and its not like you are there sitting alone. Plus your child is a teen/preteen? Not going to get anywhere.

Fighting this is a losing battle. A judge will not enforce parenting time with a kid who is old enough to have a say. Your best bet is to try and encourage the kid to see you and stand up to mom. That really wont go anywhere either.

Unfortunately you are stuck and the more you bang your head about this the harder your ex is going to push. You want to stop paying, stop. You want to stop driving kid to activities, stop. You want to see your kid more, work with them on their schedule but know you wont be as successful as you want.

Parenting time in these situations with a parent who works, moved or has an odd schedule just doesnt go anywhere and the court isnt going to do anything except suck you dry and if you argue you are self repped, you run the risk of paying HER costs if you lose.
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  #25  
Old 01-20-2020, 09:58 PM
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Sorry to clarify I'm requesting switching acces time to acommadate my work schedule if my ex unwilling your telling me its uphill battle to fight in court.

I dont understand how the court system is so bias.

I'm going against the order that requires me to travel more then once on my access weekend to attend activities. Which obviously in the best interest of the children.

Vs

Suspend access when working afternoons in accordance with the order. Not in best interest of the children. Losing battle in court

Wow! Where's the fairness here? So your also telling me if I went back to court to request additional access time.. it will be uphill battle?
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  #26  
Old 01-20-2020, 10:29 PM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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But if you are at work, what is the problem? You arent there to spend time with the kids.

Your kid is in an activity they enjoy and you want them to stop going so they can be with you.

Almost all of the things you want are of a benefit to you. Then you complain about how you wont win in court as it is biased.

You signed an agreement to sacrifice your time to work. You have a schedule that prevents you from being with the kids. You have agreed through actions to take kid to an activity they enjoy and you want to stop it. You dont want to pay for an activity your child enjoys. Everything you say sounds more like sorry kid, this is about me. What time exactly are you going to switch for? Getting an additional weekend? Not traveling at the sake of kids happiness? Im really having a hard time understanding what benefit this is for kid.
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  #27  
Old 01-20-2020, 10:42 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rockscan View Post
But if you are at work, what is the problem? You arent there to spend time with the kids.

Your kid is in an activity they enjoy and you want them to stop going so they can be with you.

Almost all of the things you want are of a benefit to you. Then you complain about how you wont win in court as it is biased.

You signed an agreement to sacrifice your time to work. You have a schedule that prevents you from being with the kids. You have agreed through actions to take kid to an activity they enjoy and you want to stop it. You dont want to pay for an activity your child enjoys. Everything you say sounds more like sorry kid, this is about me. What time exactly are you going to switch for? Getting an additional weekend? Not traveling at the sake of kids happiness? Im really having a hard time understanding what benefit this is for kid.
Yes! Your absolutely right however if I'm working afternoons I'm requesting to switch weekends..

I dont mind paying for activities within reason.. I'm not atm machine.. I just feel like I have absolutely zero say in anything. The sky is the limit..

Yes I'm requesting switching access weekends when I work afternoons also when the children are done their activities in May. I would like 4 consecutive weekends and the extra week in the summer to be alternating..

What judge would disagree awarding a father additional access time? 18% access time is peanuts
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  #28  
Old 01-20-2020, 11:10 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MjD View Post
Yes! Your absolutely right however if I'm working afternoons I'm requesting to switch weekends..



I dont mind paying for activities within reason.. I'm not atm machine.. I just feel like I have absolutely zero say in anything. The sky is the limit..



Yes I'm requesting switching access weekends when I work afternoons also when the children are done their activities in May. I would like 4 consecutive weekends and the extra week in the summer to be alternating..



What judge would disagree awarding a father additional access time? 18% access time is peanuts


Getting consecutive weekends is unrealistic. No mother will agree to that and a judge wont allow a mom to go without seeing the kids.

Dont be an atm then. She doesnt have to agree to what you want, you dont have to agree to what she wants.
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  #29  
Old 01-21-2020, 10:07 AM
MjD MjD is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rockscan View Post
Getting consecutive weekends is unrealistic. No mother will agree to that and a judge won’t allow a mom to go without seeing the kids.

Don’t be an atm then. She doesn’t have to agree to what you want, you don’t have to agree to what she wants.
Yes! Your absolutely right... it only 4 consecutive weekends and then it's back to default every 2nd weekend. What's the difference between 50/50 custody and asking judge for additional access time.. In shared custody mum only sees her children half of time. I only have my children 18% of time which from less then 50/50 custody.

So in other words fathers that go back to court to request additional access time with their children have been denied? I find this hard to believe?

This doesn't make sense earlier it was mentioned that mum doesn't need my consent to enroll the children in extra-curricular activities and I'm expected to pay what ever that cost is. Now Its mentioned that neither of us have to agree?
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  #30  
Old 01-21-2020, 11:22 AM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MjD View Post
So in other words fathers that go back to court to request additional access time with their children have been denied? I find this hard to believe?



This doesn't make sense earlier it was mentioned that mum doesn't need my consent to enroll the children in extra-curricular activities and I'm expected to pay what ever that cost is. Now Its mentioned that neither of us have to agree?

You seem to be unhappy about a lot of things while still failing to realize that you contributed to this problem. You also fail to realize that this isnt a case of mom trying to hurt you, its kid wanting to do an activity they enjoy. Have you watched your daughter at her events? Is she happy doing this activity? You need to think about that.

In a few years it will be kid has to work so they dont see you. Are you going to make them quit their job?

If you want to push this to court to get more time then do it. Several people here have told you its a big gamble you will probably lose. A judge will look at your schedule and the agreement and let you know that there isnt much they can do. Plus, by the time it actually got to that point your child will be old enough to choose and will not want to be a part of the argument.

Your ex needs your agreement in writing to get the extra costs paid for but since you have been paying for it she has a good case for keeping it. This is an activity that kid has been in for a while. It isnt a case of mom deciding to sign them up for multiple activities making you pay. The activity runs on weekends which means ultimately you will have to drive them. You are not happy about that despite being told that it is an opportunity for you to bond with your child and share something they enjoy.

As I said, this seems more about YOU and what YOU want rather than what is good for the kid(s). Yes it sucks that your child is in an activity they enjoy that takes up your time but that is their choice. Yes you work and cant be with your kids but its best for them to be with their other parent rather than in child care. A judge will look at what is best for the kids and nothing in your argument says that. Instead it says Im feel I am not treated fairly.
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