Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

looking for some answers

Collapse
This topic is closed.
X
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • looking for some answers

    Been a while since i have posted here looking for advice, for i was hoping that my ex and i could come to some sort of agreement. Boy was i wrong yet again.

    We agreed to put the past behind us for the best interest of the girls, and he would encourage them to call me once a week, and to write letters and send pics to me. He supposedly sent a parcel with pics and letters from the girls which i still haven't seend and the girls have called me ONCE!! Also he asked me to send him my three copies of our homemade separation agreement in return he would file for the divorce simply as an uncontested one. Well I didn't feel that it was right that i sent him my three copies for they are the only thing that i have left showing that i didn't just get up and walk out one day, so i sent him two orignals and a photocopy and told him that i would send him the other orignal when he sent the papers for the uncontested divorce. Well all hell has broken loose and he was mad about the idea and now states that if i even file for the divorce myself he will contest it. I really don't understand him, I mean we are both living with new partners, and his new partner is pregnant so why contest a divorce from me? We have been legally separtated now for a year and i just want this nightmare over with. All i ask is that i get to visitation of my girls and that they keep in contact with me as well. For the last year aside from the one phone call that they have made to me, any contact with them has been from me calling them.

    Do i have any rights to getting this done with out there being a huge court battle over just getting the divorce? IF he was to contest my petition to the courts for a divorce what is the process that it goes through?

    flustered_unenlightened

  • #2
    Hi flustered_enlighted,

    I'm sorry you and your stbx haven't been able to come to an agreement.

    I don't know much about your situation, but if you commenced divorce proceedings, he would have every right to respond to your application with an answer making a claim for child support sole custody, spousal support (depending on your income situation) or division of property (depending on whether this is even applicable), among other claims. Even if these issues have already been dealt with in the separation agreement, he does have the right to try and enforce the terms through the court. Regardless of whether he has any reason to have to enforce the agreement through a court order, it's going to cost time and money for you both.

    I'm not sure what use your stbx has for three original separation agreements. He only needs one original for his records and you only need one original for yours. Nevertheless, I'm not sure why he's threatening a contested divorce simply because you only provided him with two original separation agreements and not three. There seems to be no reason for him to contest the divorce if a separation is in place and is being followed. I think just have a control issue on your hands.

    If he contests, while it's possible to sever the divorce from the court proceeding, you would still have to face your stbx's claims regardless, which again will cost time and money.

    As far as the court process, that depends on the issues at hand. Perhaps you would only have to attend at a case conference and just end things with a consent order. I think that would be the best scenario next to going through the uncontested divorce process.

    If you do move ahead with an application, you should be prepared for what may come. The best way to prepare is to speak with a lawyer, who will be able to give you in-depth advice based on your situation.

    Best of luck and keep us posted,

    Lindsay

    Comment


    • #3
      Thanks for your response.

      I am tried of waiting for my ex to get on with the divorce, (he has stated many times that he has gotten them and filled them out all he had to do was file them) there has been the year separation between us now and we have both moved on with our new lives. We both agree that we want the divorce but he now is being controlling and saying that if i file he will contest it. Well i want to see if he will actually do that. I understand that he has a right to contest it and if he does that means lawyer bills and court dates for both of us but i really have no choice anymore but to try.

      Have a few questions.
      Can I file for a divorce while living in the USA? (The marriage was/is a canadian one.)
      Do I need to file the divorce in the canadian court system?
      What forms do I need to fill out to file this as a UCD?
      Once the forms are filled out where do i send them and what is the cost to file them?

      I don't have an income atm so I am trying to do this the fastest and easiest way. I know that there are somethings that need to be settled but i am tired of being legally married.

      flustered_unenlightened

      Comment


      • #4
        Hi flustered_enlighted,

        Can I file for a divorce while living in the USA?
        Do I need to file the divorce in the canadian court system?
        Since your husband still lives in Canada, you may file here. At least one party must be living in Canada in order for a proceeding to go ahead here. It's possible that you may be able to apply in the US depending on how long you have been living there. Check with your local court house to see what your rights are on applying for an uncontested divorce in the States.

        However, say you are able to file in the US and you do this. If your husband contests and asks for child support and division of property, this would complicate things. Since the children are in Canada, you could be facing a jurisdictional issue on top of the other issues, which means more legal fees and court time. If you think there's a good chance that your husband will contest, or if you just don't want to take the risk, I think it's safer to apply here in Canada. That way you can retain a Canadian lawyer to deal with any contested issues.

        What forms do I need to fill out to file this as a UCD?
        Once the forms are filled out where do i send them and what is the cost to file them?
        Have a look at these instructions on filing for an UCD in Ontario. The instructions list all of the documents you will need and tells you the steps you must take.

        If the procedure will be going ahead in Ontario and you are low on funds, you may want to consider Jeffrey's services. He provides a divorce kit service where he prepares all the documentation for you and you do the legwork yourself, or the full UCD where he takes care of the entire UCD process for you from start to finish.

        Lindsay

        Comment


        • #5
          Hmmmm...

          If I was to an UCD by myself I have a few questions...

          Once I have the forms filled out and are ready to be filed can I mail them to the courthouse or do I have to take them there personally?

          Why is there a filling fee and why is it so expensive? $477 or whatever isn't that kinda of crazy?

          I have found one of the forms that are required to fill out to file for the UCD but I can't seem to find the other one, is that one the courts will give to me or is there somewhere I can get all the forms needed?

          What happens if I don't have a copy of the Marriage certificate? Where and how much is it to obtain a copy of it?

          There is so much little details that are involved in this, no wonder people say that this is a stressfull process and to find outside support.

          flustered_unenlightened

          Comment


          • #6
            Hi flustered_enlighted,

            Once I have the forms filled out and are ready to be filed can I mail them to the courthouse or do I have to take them there personally?
            You definitely can't deal with your divorce through the mail. Most court houses allow either anyone to attend personally to file the documents, however I recently learned that some court houses, such as the one in Haileybury, Ontario, only allow the applicant or the respondent to file documents (which I find a quite ridiculous). You should contact the court house at which you will be filing to check and see what their rules are on filing. I can confirm off the top of my head though that Ottawa, Toronto and Brampton allow anyone to file divorce documentation.

            Why is there a filling fee and why is it so expensive? $477 or whatever isn't that kinda of crazy?
            You will need to make the following payments to the court: $167.00 when you file the application, $280.00 when you file the affidavit for divorce and $19.00 to get your certificate of divorce for a total of $466.00. While that does seem expensive for some, these costs are quite low compared to the legal fees that may result from a contested divorce. Parties could end up paying tens of thousands to resolve a messy divorce.

            Unfortunately, there is no way around these UCD court costs. They must be paid in order to get a divorce.

            is there somewhere I can get all the forms needed?
            You can pick up hard copies of the forms at your local court house or download them online from Ontario Court Services - Family Law Rules Forms. The link to those instructions I gave you in my last post will tell you what forms you need.

            What happens if I don't have a copy of the Marriage certificate? Where and how much is it to obtain a copy of it?
            You absolutely need this. Some court houses allow you to get away with filing a photocopy, so if you have at least that, give it a try. If you don't have anything, you must order a new certificate. If you were married in Ontario, you may order you certificate online at the Office of the Registrar General web site. If you were married elsewhere, you will need to order the certificate from the applicable Provincial or State government. It normally takes about 6 to 8 weeks for a marriage certificate to come in for Ontario residents. I suggest you make the order immediately.

            You're right, even though an uncontested divorce is the easiest way to obtain a divorce, that doesn't mean it's a breeze. Just know that if you read through the documents carefully and stay organized, you can definitely do this yourself. The forum is here to help and so is the FLIC at the court house at which you will be filing.

            Lindsay

            Comment

            Our Divorce Forums
            Forums dedicated to helping people all across Canada get through the separation and divorce process, with discussions about legal issues, parenting issues, financial issues and more.
            Working...
            X