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does it ever really end?

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  • does it ever really end?

    My partner finalized his divorce in March. His ex kept the house and pretty much everything in it and a LOC. He pays more than 70% of his income to her for child/spousal support, leaving him the equivalent of just over a minimum wage income while she gets $43200/yr NET after tax credits. She had 90 days to transfer the mortgage, the house, the LOC to her name along with canceling a joint bank account.

    It's been 105 days now and she has done NOTHING. So he calls his lawyer who says he can't file anything until she is 30 days past the 90. And THEN he can file a motion to sell the house. The agreement was that if she couldn't transfer it within 90 days, the house would be sold and she would keep the revenue from it.

    So here we are 3 months post-divorce and no better off. They still have a joint bank account; his name is still on the LOC; the mortgage; the house; AND her vehicle is leased in his name and will stay that way for the duration of the lease - another 3 years.

    What can he do about this? NOTHING. He must wait another 15 days and then he must pay legal fees for yet another day in court. And even if he were awarded costs, how is she going to pay them? I'm starting to wonder how long it will be before she puts a motion to extend spousal support and how easily a judge will grant her this. (they were married for 5 years and she was a SAHM the entire 5-yr duration)

    I keep looking forward to the "end" in my own custody proceedings which have been dragging for 2 years now, but does it ever really end?? Do we ever really get out? I take solace in the fact that eventually our children will be grown but it seems like a long hard road before then.

    Just needed to vent...

  • #2
    Sk8r,

    There really is nothing ever final in family law. You never mentioned if the other party is represented by legal aid or is footing the bill for their own solicitor. I suspect that they are covering their own legal fees. I am somewhat surprised that your spouse is left with 30%. Spousal support should be of short duration due to the length of the relationship, I would think.

    lv

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    • #3
      Sk8r,

      At every milestone I thought it would end. Our split was 4 years ago and we are far from "over". I assume we will be done with divorce when I am dead and buried (and then the hell will pass on to my estate and current wife until she is dead and buried).

      No wonder second marriages fail so often... you needs this crap (indefinite abuse from 1st marriage).

      Comment


      • #4
        Yes, the duration is short - 3 years total. He agreed to the amount on that basis. However, if she is successful in extending the duration, his "being nice" will be for nothing. She has now had a year and a half to look for employment and refuses to even begin.

        She is "sort of" footing her own legal bill. She paid the first $3500 by cashing his tax refund cheque that was mailed to the matrimonial home - without his consent - guess what, can't do anything aobut that either because she deposited it to a joint acount and then removed it. He paid another $5200 to her lawyer in lieu of 3 months of spousal support.

        He has been very generous and he is very concerned about how everything will affect the children. She takes advantage of that. How do you force your ex spouse to sell the house when your children live in it? It's not a nice scenario - I guess divorce never is.

        My scenario - agreed to 50-50, but ex couldn't get it together to take them 50%. Then my ex remarried and moved out of town making 50-50 impossible so he started the standard every-other-weekend and half of holidays - with the new wife, he could manage this. Now he wants me to give up residence. How about no. It was supposed to be an easy split - now it's never-ending.

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        • #5
          Sk8r,

          It appears that he is funding her litigation in advance so to speak.

          lv.

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          • #6
            Indeed.

            The alternative has always been to go to trial and spend even more on legal fees. It seemed the smarter route to just cut his losses and give her what she wanted, but it's not looking as wise anymore.

            Comment


            • #7
              Sk8r,

              you mentioned

              She paid the first $3500 by cashing his tax refund cheque that was mailed to the matrimonial home - without his consent - guess what, can't do anything aobut that either because she deposited it to a joint acount and then removed it.
              I think you could do something about it. Opening someone else's mail is against the law. Was this cheque ever signed? If so, who signed it?
              Forgery is also against the law. seems to be some fraudulent behavior going on by this party.

              lv

              Comment


              • #8
                The cheque was not signed.

                It was deposited by bank machine into a joint account. The bank does not require a signature if you deposit a cheque into an account with your name on it.

                They had already been living separately for 7 months at the time. She claims that she had a right to the money because the refund was "because of her and the kids" and was for the tax year in which they were still married. It's a pretty hollow argument, but then she also honestly believes that he should support her for life. The kids, yes, her no.

                We did investigate some sort of criminal charges, but, again - that didn't seem to be in the childrens best interest at the time. We hoped that it would be one more thing to equal out in the divorce - it wasn't.

                Comment

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