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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #21  
Old 09-06-2013, 12:27 PM
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The current order says nothing as to pick up or drop off
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  #22  
Old 09-06-2013, 12:34 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Charyl View Post
The current order says nothing as to pick up or drop off
What did you do before she moved? If it is the same as what you've been doing now (ie. all the driving) than you are likely stuck. That is status quo until a court orders otherwise. You can politely request that due to her unilateral decision to move, that she should be involved in transportation of the children and that you request that each parent be responsible for picking up the children at the beginning of their parenting time (mean you pick up at the start of your time and she picks up at the end of your time. You do this as your ex isn't as interested in you having your time as you are, so it eliminates any excuse they have for not dropping them off. If they are late for pickup, well that is just more time with you and the kids).

If you dictate to her how things are going to be, you look no better than she does.
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  #23  
Old 09-06-2013, 12:37 PM
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Ok, sorry everyone I think I may be reading this worng but I have a few questions that I think wil clear some things ok.

You have a schedule that has been going on for 3 months? True false?
Your in court and haven't had a case conference?
You ex recently (like in the last few weeks) moved from where she it?

Is this correct or not?
What has been going on for 3 months?
What has happened recently?

If the move happened recently then yes you can and should file for a non removal order. You will likely have a good leg to stand on.

Has she stated in an affidavit that the move was because of her new BF?
If you have proof that it was because she was evicted then you can use that to show credibility.

Where do you live?
Where did she live? distance? travel time?
Where does she live now? distance? travel time?


these are the most important questions at hand.
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  #24  
Old 09-06-2013, 12:47 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by involveddad75 View Post
Ok, sorry everyone I think I may be reading this worng but I have a few questions that I think wil clear some things ok.

You have a schedule that has been going on for 3 months? True false?
Your in court and haven't had a case conference?
You ex recently (like in the last few weeks) moved from where she it?

Is this correct or not?
What has been going on for 3 months?
What has happened recently?

If the move happened recently then yes you can and should file for a non removal order. You will likely have a good leg to stand on.

Has she stated in an affidavit that the move was because of her new BF?
If you have proof that it was because she was evicted then you can use that to show credibility.

Where do you live?
Where did she live? distance? travel time?
Where does she live now? distance? travel time?


these are the most important questions at hand.
My understanding is:

- there is a court order or agreement pertaining to parenting time. It's been in effect for longer than 3 months.
- ex moved 3 months ago, stated it was due to issues with then bf.
- OP lives in Hamilton, the ex moved an hour away (giving a radius from Niagara, Guelph, Brampton, Toronto)
- the move impacted his previously provided parenting time, so the impact has been for the past three months.
- they are still in court finalizing custody and there date coming up soon (conference or whatever)

That is what I gathered.
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  #25  
Old 09-06-2013, 12:56 PM
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Before she moved she lived about 10 minutes up the hill in Hamilton. I would pick up and drop off the girls at her place. She said she couldn't do half-and-half with me because she has a baby at home (not my child). I agreed to try and keep things ciil. Once she moved, Pick ups and drop offs were changed to a Tim Hortons near her old place, i was fine with that. She went back to work at the end of July and since then she has expected me to drive all the way to her new place to pick up the children. My problem is because we are currently in a custody case Her new residence being as far away as it is Impacts what I am requesting For custody which is to turn my weekday visits into overnights. I still go out to her new place to pick up the children But feel it is only fair that she then come to my place to pick them up at night. She says no way she is not doing it she has a baby at home and it is my responsibility to get them back for 830. She has the attitude that I am here to make her life easier. I am tired of her controlling the entire situation and me having a zero say Or knowledge in what goes on with my children's life.
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  #26  
Old 09-06-2013, 01:03 PM
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Her new child is not your responsibility and shouldn't have any impact on anything factually, it likely will given the emotional aspect.

Her decision to have more children doesn't negate her obligations relating to her previous children. She knew she had existing obligations and choose to get pregnant anyway. Her choices should in no way adversely affect you.

In reality, it likely will. A judge may not agree with you that she should put an infant in the car for a 2 hour round trip. However, that is when you argue that 4 hours for you in a day is unreasonable and request that your parenting time be expanded and adjusted to make it more reasonable. Like full weekends etc. Also, if you lose (lets say the Tuesday) parenting time due to being unable to make it has become a financial burden or unmanageable, you request that you get an extra overnight or something to compensate for that time.

There is another thread that is ongoing, from like yesterday, on this same matter. You should search for it. It likely is still on the first page of this section.
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  #27  
Old 09-06-2013, 01:48 PM
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Hindsight is 20-20, but this is the key part of the problem:

Quote:
Once she moved, Pick ups and drop offs were changed to a Tim Hortons near her old place, i was fine with that. She went back to work at the end of July and since then she has expected me to drive all the way to her new place to pick up the children.
It's now September, so you have let her do this for several weeks now.
You have two choices...

1. Continue to do the driving, kick your lawyer and get him to file a motion for relief/expansion of access due to her unilateral decision to move. (at MINIMUM you should have the EOW screwjob, was the drugs issue against you or something?)

2. Pick up the kids, then send her a message that you do not agree to her unilateral decision to move and that you expect her to pick the kids up to end her time. Draw your line in the sand and stick to it.

Option 1 will make you look better in court, Option 2 makes you no better than her, but at least will force her to pick a side and stop straddling the fence.

If she calls the police, you have your court order and the email that was sent ready and you politely explain to the officer that the children are ready and waiting for her to pickup.

Get their names and badge numbers and ask for the incident file number.
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  #28  
Old 09-06-2013, 01:54 PM
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Thank you.

No the drug accusations were against her. I am not sure how the hell the results came back negative but they did. She delayed it so long she was probably knew just how long to wait to get the crap out of her system.

I am anxious to meet with my lawyer. But will continue to do what I have to for my kids sake.

Thank you again for all your advice, its helped tremendously. I wish I'd found this site sooner.

I wonder if due to her lack of cooperation with this whole process if I can ask for costs? Shes the applicant and has done nothing, she didnt even have her paperwork in ontime. Hmmm cant get blood from a stone I suppose!
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  #29  
Old 09-06-2013, 02:00 PM
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I'm still wondering how the hell you have LESS than the standard minimums.
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  #30  
Old 09-06-2013, 02:02 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NBDad View Post
I'm still wondering how the hell you have LESS than the standard minimums.
I'm sorry I dont know what??
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