Ottawa Divorce .com Forums


User CP

New posts

Advertising

  Ottawa Divorce .com Forums > Main Category > Divorce & Family Law

Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

View Poll Results: Allow OCL Clinician (not lawyer) to talk to 4 year old child alone?
Yes 5 71.43%
No 2 28.57%
Voters: 7. You may not vote on this poll

Reply
 
Thread Tools
  #1  
Old 05-27-2019, 09:41 AM
SashaQ SashaQ is offline
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2019
Location: Ontario
Posts: 5
SashaQ is on a distinguished road
Angry Complaints regarding OCL clinician and CAS

Hello everyone!

I have not been able to find a response to this query yet. I will be grateful if someone can point me in the right direction.

OCL:

I want the current Clinician removed, and another Clinician assigned.

OCL Clinician was assigned to our case because the father insisted on the OCL involvement. Although the Judge was against the idea, regardless he wrote the order (which is another bone of contention but whatever!)

So under s.112, we got a Clinician ONLY. Our child is 4 years old.

OCL clinician has met with me only thus far. I did not like the way she handled the conversations because I had notified her that there are some serious psychological abuse issues. I directed her to obtain some video evidence of it which exists (at a doctor's office waiting area no less!) She totally ignored that and goes, "So how much more access you are willing to give?" I am thinking, 'What the heck!? What did I just tell you, lady!?'

There were numerous things she said during that visit which made me wonder 'what the heck is wrong with her?'

Then while this OCL investigation was going, the father called CAS on me again. (He has done that several times over the last couple of years.)

So the OCL Clinician had to stop until this CAS investigation completed. I told the CAS Clinician the same thing about the psychological abuse/video, but she also ignored that.

I, later on, realized why CAS was in a rush to close off the investigation. It's because the OCL Clinician wants to hurry up and get this over with as she relayed to me on her next call.

She wants to see our child for a visit on a particular day when we are not available. She insisted that the day works perfectly for her and I am now delaying things. The day that works for me is only 3 days after! Anyway, she hasn't even met the child's father yet even for that 2-hour initial interview with him!

I feel like forced and rushed by her.

On another note, she wants to talk to our 4-year-old child alone. She is not a lawyer. Is this normal? Should I allow this?

CAS:
I feel my concerns about the abuse were not investigated at all! I feel that both are painting me with the same paintbrush that they would use on someone who is crying wolf during court proceedings. Which this is not.

Our child is more vocal now at 4 years old and says more things that happen during their access visits. And what they are saying is also not being taken seriously.

I also don't know for sure what is the father's address where he takes our child every other weekend. (We separated in 2016!)

They also tell me that because our child is with his father for weekends only and they do not work on weekends. And, that if the CAS person is 'able' to visit on Friday evenings then they will.

Whom can I complain to about CAS?

Now, this isn't my first rodeo with social workers. We had CAS involvement that lasted over a year. And at that time, they did not visit our child with his father even once.

I am at my wits end with these people. Please help!
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 05-27-2019, 02:10 PM
Janus's Avatar
Janus Janus is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 2,209
Janus will become famous soon enoughJanus will become famous soon enough
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by SashaQ View Post
I directed her to obtain some video evidence
I think you misunderstand your role in this investigation.


Quote:
'What the heck!? What did I just tell you, lady!?'
Donald Trump is able to tell investigators what they are allowed to investigate. You are not Donald Trump.

Quote:
There were numerous things she said during that visit which made me wonder 'what the heck is wrong with her?'
You are probably used to your friends and family who tell you that you are normal and assume you are telling the truth. This investigator is under so such obligation to keep you happy.

Quote:
I told the CAS Clinician the same thing about the psychological abuse/video, but she also ignored that.
So, two professionals have already told you that this video is of no consequence. Rather than get the clear message, your hope is to replace these professionals with other professionals who will do what you want them to do.

Quote:
Our child is more vocal now at 4 years old and says more things that happen during their access visits. And what they are saying is also not being taken seriously.
Well, I imagine once they talk to your 4 year old they might take it more seriously...

Quote:
On another note, she wants to talk to our 4-year-old child alone. She is not a lawyer. Is this normal? Should I allow this?
Haha, psyche! You don't want them to talk to the 4-year old!

So, you want the investigator to take your 4-year old seriously, but you don't want her to talk to your 4-year old. No wait, you want her to talk to the 4-year old, but only in your presence, where the 4-year old will be sure to only say things that would make you happy.

Alternatively, they should trust you when you say that your 4-year old tells you things, because you are a good impartial witness.. I mean, good impartial... I give up.

I don't know you at all, and I can already tell why you are being ignored. You are not even remotely internally consistent.

Quote:
I also don't know for sure what is the father's address where he takes our child every other weekend. (We separated in 2016!)
Do you have a cellphone? Can you contact him in case of emergency?

Why do you need the address, are you looking to stalk him? I don't tell my ex where I am taking the kids unless I have a specific reason to do so. Why would I?

Quote:
Whom can I complain to about CAS?
Probably the best person would be a therapist, who can help you resolve some of the anger you feel. Anybody else will probably ignore you.
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 05-27-2019, 03:03 PM
SashaQ SashaQ is offline
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2019
Location: Ontario
Posts: 5
SashaQ is on a distinguished road
Talking

Quote:
Originally Posted by Janus View Post
I think you misunderstand your role in this investigation.

Donald Trump is able to tell investigators what they are allowed to investigate. You are not Donald Trump.

You are probably used to your friends and family who tell you that you are normal and assume you are telling the truth. This investigator is under so such obligation to keep you happy.

So, two professionals have already told you that this video is of no consequence. Rather than get the clear message, your hope is to replace these professionals with other professionals who will do what you want them to do.

Well, I imagine once they talk to your 4 year old they might take it more seriously...

Haha, psyche! You don't want them to talk to the 4-year old!

So, you want the investigator to take your 4-year old seriously, but you don't want her to talk to your 4-year old. No wait, you want her to talk to the 4-year old, but only in your presence, where the 4-year old will be sure to only say things that would make you happy.

Alternatively, they should trust you when you say that your 4-year old tells you things, because you are a good impartial witness.. I mean, good impartial... I give up.

I don't know you at all, and I can already tell why you are being ignored. You are not even remotely internally consistent.

Do you have a cellphone? Can you contact him in case of emergency?

Why do you need the address, are you looking to stalk him? I don't tell my ex where I am taking the kids unless I have a specific reason to do so. Why would I?1

Probably the best person would be a therapist, who can help you resolve some of the anger you feel. Anybody else will probably ignore you.

Janus, the ONLY thing you were able to convince me with your nonsense was that your ex is so lucky to have left you.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 05-27-2019, 03:52 PM
Janus's Avatar
Janus Janus is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 2,209
Janus will become famous soon enoughJanus will become famous soon enough
Default

Why is that? What part of what I said was upsetting?
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 05-27-2019, 04:41 PM
rockscan rockscan is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 4,750
rockscan will become famous soon enough
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by SashaQ View Post
Janus, the ONLY thing you were able to convince me with your nonsense was that your ex is so lucky to have left you.


He has valid points. And your response pretty much backs up most of what he said.

For instance, when You say your child is believable when she repeats stuff from her dad but then wonít be believable if she is in the room with OCL and CAS.

If you are so worried about your child and custody/parenting time then OCL is a good thing.

Gatekeepers/control freaks are not very welcome in these parts...
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 05-27-2019, 05:00 PM
Happyatlantic Happyatlantic is offline
Member
 
Join Date: May 2019
Location: Dartmouth, Nova Scotia
Posts: 46
Happyatlantic is on a distinguished road
Default

I am assuming CAS is like child protective services but what is OCL? I dont see what your complaint other than a disagreement. Could you not discuss with your MLA. I assume if something happened during your ex's access time they would inform you. Therefore why do you need to know where your ex lives.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 05-28-2019, 07:03 PM
Berner_Faith Berner_Faith is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Ontario
Posts: 3,329
Berner_Faith will become famous soon enough
Default

I always find it amusing when people who are not professionals think they know more... you are basically looking to replace these professionals because they didnít agree with you... you need to understand YOU and YOUR children are under investigation with both the OCL and CAS... your job is to answer their questions and work with them... their job is to ask the questions and complete the investigation. They donít care about the video because it most likely isnít relevant to their investigation. You and your ex were crappy partners clearly, doesnít mean either of you are crappy parents. Do you have police reports and charges against him regarding these issues?

From an outsider looking in... youíre going to find yourself walking on thin ice. You canít stomp your feet whenever you donít get your way or like the way something is going. These people have a process they follow and they donít care about what you think they should be doing... best to work with them instead of against them if you want to be viewed in a positive light...


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 05-29-2019, 09:50 AM
iona6656 iona6656 is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2018
Posts: 753
iona6656 is on a distinguished road
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Janus View Post
I
So, two professionals have already told you that this video is of no consequence. Rather than get the clear message, your hope is to replace these professionals with other professionals who will do what you want them to do.
To be fair- that is basically the entire premise of trials in family law. Let's all find "professionals" who will back up our side of the story.

Quote:
Why do you need the address, are you looking to stalk him? I don't tell my ex where I am taking the kids unless I have a specific reason to do so. Why would I?
Is it not normally the case that parents give each other their regular home address where they spend time with the kid(s)?
I feel like hiding or withholding your address would be a huge red flag to wave to show the two parties cannot get along.

Quote:
Probably the best person would be a therapist, who can help you resolve some of the anger you feel. Anybody else will probably ignore you.
to the OP- I know what Janus said is harsh- but this right here ^ is good advice. If you are leaving an abusive relationship...and you're fighting a custody battle- the first thing you should always do/budget for is a therapist.
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 05-29-2019, 09:55 AM
iona6656 iona6656 is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2018
Posts: 753
iona6656 is on a distinguished road
Default

To the OP. If what you are saying is true- where's your evidence?

What does the video that you reference show?

Are there police reports?

If there aren't police reports- what evidence od you have to show your ex is/was abusive? did you have counselling before where you discussed your concerns?

What are your concerns in relation to your child? What exactly is it that you're afraid of your ex doing?

What's your concern with the OCL speaking to your son?

What did the OCL say that made you question her judgment?

EVERYONE cries bias on the OCL. just fyi.
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 05-29-2019, 12:22 PM
Tayken's Avatar
Tayken Tayken is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 7,037
Tayken has a brilliant futureTayken has a brilliant futureTayken has a brilliant futureTayken has a brilliant futureTayken has a brilliant futureTayken has a brilliant futureTayken has a brilliant futureTayken has a brilliant futureTayken has a brilliant futureTayken has a brilliant futureTayken has a brilliant future
Default

I am hoping this is before Pazaratz because it is going to be an awesome read.

Quote:
51. The mother needs to clearly understand: the court system recognizes what she is doing, and we will not tolerate it.
So do the posters of this site.

The original poster should read this case: https://www.canlii.org/en/on/onsc/do...9onsc1004.html

Good Luck!
Tayken
Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
cas, complaint, ocl


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 09:41 AM.