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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #11  
Old 08-23-2015, 02:42 PM
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blinkandimgone blinkandimgone is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ninehundredt View Post
Already been there and done that. After she refused to allow for a family friend to do the exchanges I initiated the application with an exchange centre. The exchange centre has immediate availability, but they need her to call to continue the application process I started.

This is why I'm curious about the consequences for her, as she is refusing to cooperate unless she is forced by the courts.
Then attend with and remain in the car or standing outside the vehicle at the end of the driveway. It's your time and you are attempting to exercise it. Document every refusal and withholding as denial of access.

If you won't do that, at the very least show up at the exchange centre every time you are scheduled and have her no shows documented as well.

Last edited by blinkandimgone; 08-23-2015 at 02:45 PM.
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  #12  
Old 08-24-2015, 03:07 PM
YYZDaddy YYZDaddy is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Links17 View Post
For other dads reading this, if you fail to go to court for custody and the claim judges will do X, Y or Z. You are not helping yourself, the children or other fathers in the future. The only thing that the record & statistics will show is that you consented to the mom having custody.
Couldn't agree more with Links17...
FIGHT for all the access time you can, and sole/joint custody if you can. (Sounds like you may have a reasonable case here).

FWIW... I am in the final stages of a custody battle and will get sole custody and primary access, because I didn't accept anything less than equal access. My ex refused to consider anything more than her sole custody and me EOW dad. This did not go well for her. (lots of ugly details omitted)

Many stories I hear of fathers not having custody or equal access are a result of not really trying for it. Yes, it's stressful and expensive.

Fight, man. Fight.
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  #13  
Old 08-24-2015, 06:19 PM
Dadx5 Dadx5 is offline
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I had a very high conflict ex, who broke court orders all the time, each time there was a significant break I went for a motion, eventually the contempts added up and she lost time, we moved from her having sole to shared.

Again she played games and withheld more, so judge moved child into my primary care granting me some extra days.

Ex continued and withheld again, and for now she has no access with our daughter.

Its a long battle but it can be won. Just document, attempt access everytime, and go for motions change will happen it just might be slow.
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  #14  
Old 08-25-2015, 10:54 AM
FirstTimer FirstTimer is offline
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How many motions did you go through before it was switched.

When you say signficant break, how long was that? She withheld access from you? My situation is slightly different, she breaks the court order by not taking him to school on his days.

She's been doing this for the past 6 months and i was going to take her to court on this but we have a hearing scheduled by the judge Sept 8.

Howver, I just found out yesterday that she as the application didn't book it, so now it could be possible that we will not be in court till next year due to the fact that there are no available spots for special chambers till beginning of next year.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Dadx5 View Post
I had a very high conflict ex, who broke court orders all the time, each time there was a significant break I went for a motion, eventually the contempts added up and she lost time, we moved from her having sole to shared.

Again she played games and withheld more, so judge moved child into my primary care granting me some extra days.

Ex continued and withheld again, and for now she has no access with our daughter.

Its a long battle but it can be won. Just document, attempt access everytime, and go for motions change will happen it just might be slow.
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  #15  
Old 08-25-2015, 09:49 PM
Dadx5 Dadx5 is offline
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I am guessing you are a different province then me as I don't know what special chambers is?

In my situation I was not with mom when child born so I had a series of court appearances to get paternity and start access. but over the last few years I had probably about 8 motions (contempts) before I started getting any movement in how I was seen in the courts. The main court issues started in 2011 and are only changing now. During that time I have lost from weekends, to months of access at a time.

Yes I have dealt with mom not taking child to school to block access. I submitted a copy of school record, and judge was very strict with her about this as child needs to be in school.
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  #16  
Old 08-26-2015, 08:02 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FirstTimer View Post
How many motions did you go through before it was switched.

When you say signficant break, how long was that? She withheld access from you? My situation is slightly different, she breaks the court order by not taking him to school on his days.

She's been doing this for the past 6 months and i was going to take her to court on this but we have a hearing scheduled by the judge Sept 8.

Howver, I just found out yesterday that she as the application didn't book it, so now it could be possible that we will not be in court till next year due to the fact that there are no available spots for special chambers till beginning of next year.
Dates for special chambers (Alberta) come available frequently. You have to check daily. Here is the link for Edmonton. You can navigate around and insert your city.

https://albertacourts.ca/docs/defaul...pdf?sfvrsn=602

"To book a 20-60 minute "family law special chambers" application to be heard in Edmonton, please call (780)638-3637 (a dedicated phone line to the Edmonton clerks' office). This is offered in Edmonton only, at the moment. All FLS applications are set for 2:00 pm. The weblink below, showing "FLS Available hearing dates" only pertains to booking a 20-60 minute application, and DOES NOT apply to applications outside the hearing length guidelines set out in Family Law Practice Note #2, eff. March 1, 2011. PLEASE NOTE: If your application will exceed 60 minutes, you can only book it through the Special Chambers Trial Coordinator at (780)422-2313."
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  #17  
Old 08-27-2015, 09:02 AM
ninehundredt ninehundredt is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dadx5 View Post
I had a very high conflict ex, who broke court orders all the time, each time there was a significant break I went for a motion, eventually the contempts added up and she lost time, we moved from her having sole to shared.

Again she played games and withheld more, so judge moved child into my primary care granting me some extra days.

Ex continued and withheld again, and for now she has no access with our daughter.

Its a long battle but it can be won. Just document, attempt access everytime, and go for motions change will happen it just might be slow.
This sounds strikingly similar to my situation. I have just reached 2 months of not seeing my kids again. Motion will hopefully be heard in the coming weeks.

Surprised to come across this news article yesterday. A bit disturbing how long it took for the courts to finally grant the father custody, but still a step in the right direction:

Mom loses custody for alienating dad | Toronto Star

https://www.canlii.org/en/on/onsc/do...&resultIndex=1

Last edited by ninehundredt; 08-27-2015 at 09:23 AM. Reason: Added CanLII link.
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  #18  
Old 08-27-2015, 09:16 AM
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2 months Ninehundret? Wow. My longest was 3 months. Hardest time of my life. I feel your pain my friend.

Some nights if there was thunderstorm I would look at the lightning and wonder if D4 was scared. Knowing I couldnt comfort her was debilitating. Lot's of sleepless nights. IMO it's one of the most traumatic things one person can do to another.

Parent's who haven't gone through it have no idea just how much it hurts. And if it hurts us that much as parents .. imagine the children, whose loving parent just disappeared without a trace.

Just as much case law cites .. denying access is tantamount to abuse.

DadX has great advice.

Good luck and please keep us updated.
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  #19  
Old 08-27-2015, 09:28 AM
ninehundredt ninehundredt is offline
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I appreciate the sentiment. My longest was also three months during the initial separation. I had hoped that I would never experience that again, but here we are.
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  #20  
Old 09-01-2015, 11:07 PM
childrenand happy childrenand happy is offline
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It is sad to see this happen. It's starting to sound like a regular occurrence. But believe me it comes around to bite them in the butt. Like they say record every time access is not given and be patient. I too went through this a year and a half later I see the kids week on week and off. Best feeling in the world that can't be replaced........
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