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Parenting Issues This forum is for discussing any of the parenting issues involved in your divorce, including parenting of step-children.

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  #21  
Old 12-03-2019, 09:04 PM
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Tayken Tayken is offline
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Originally Posted by fairlight View Post
How about keep the kids AND file the motion?
If you want a judge to lose their mind and disregard you as being a reasonable litigant... Sure do that. I wouldn't recommend it ever.
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Old 12-04-2019, 04:56 AM
Super dad Super dad is offline
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Thanks for the long reply. I'm sure it took some time for you. We have given an offer to settle and my lawyer and I gave her the paperwork to file. I have been seeing a councillor. This has been very hard on me. I am a strong guy and plan on fighting till the end to see my kids. I really hope to not sell my house. Rent in my area is pretty much the same as a mortgage.
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Old 12-04-2019, 05:40 AM
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Originally Posted by Super dad View Post
Thanks for the long reply. I'm sure it took some time for you. We have given an offer to settle and my lawyer and I gave her the paperwork to file. I have been seeing a councillor. This has been very hard on me. I am a strong guy and plan on fighting till the end to see my kids. I really hope to not sell my house. Rent in my area is pretty much the same as a mortgage.
You are not fighting to see your kids.

It is not a war, battle, or otherwise. You need to be calm, collected, and strategic in your actions. If you fall into the expensive trap (Breaking Bad Parenting) it will get very expensive to fight.

The most successful parents don't fight. They are reasonable, patient and consistent with their position. In 2019-2020 throwing mud in family court is a waste of time and resources. Especially the money resource.

The other party has a massive up-hill battle to "win" sole custody and majority access. Let them be the mudslinger. You don't need to respond to the irrelevant mudslinging. It just weakens their case. Again, read how the judge analyzed the typical conduct of warring parents and his crisp criticism of this kind of conduct.

Make reasonable offers to settle. Follow up in court in a timely manner when they go ignored and you can quickly establish full joint custody and equal access (50-50) rapidly and with as little loss to family finances as possible.

It just takes one well-orchistrated motion generally to end the nightmare if the other party is being unreasonable.

Also you are not trying to "see" your children. You are trying to establish a parenting regimine. You are a parent. You don't visit with your children. You are seeking equal residency with the other parent. Which is the NORM now.

The parent that chooses "sole custody" and "majority access" has an uphill battle. They have to "fight" and present relevant evidence to support their ask. Just because they ask doesn't mean they will get it. In fact, the faster they go to court and "ask" (or demand) for it... The sooner the matter will get resolved into 50-50.

Make sure you have a lawyer that is good. If the lawyer talks in terms of war, battles, fights, etc... and isn't level headed and respected by the court as a negotiator you are in for a very expensive and uncessful ride.
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