More stupidity...

[Duped]

Hello all,

Today while on my way to work the secretary of my sons school calls me on my cell to tell me that my sons class is going swimming at the local pool in the afternoon but does not have a suit and towel. It was the first I had heard of it and at this point was not able to make arrangements to get him what he needed. Apparently, a permission slip was signed by his mother last week but no mention of the outing was made to me. My reply to the secretary was simply, "I guess he will just have to stay behind then." Aparently the school tried unsucessfully to get in touch with my ex for her to supply the necessary articles, however, my son did go to the pool with his class as the teachers helper.

This has happened before and most likely happen again.

What do I do? Is my ex required to inform me if she signs a permission slip?
My child is the one that suffers, in all of this!

We have joint shared alternating week custody.

Thanks
Duped

[jlalex]

Hmm..I don't know that she is required persay..but I would definitly point out to her that when she doesn't relay this info to you that it is only your son that misses out and that he was probably upset that he wasn't able to participate. Perhaps you could start something like a communcation journal or a calendar marking all school events. You could hand it back and forth when you drop off and pick up your son. It may have just been absent mindedness on her part with no ill intent at all.

But I think that a calendar would be really helpful in an alternating custody situation..kids seem to have so much stuff going on these days it can be difficult to keep track of.

[Duped]

just stupid...

I tried the journal/log book, she refused.

It was intentional, several times and many games later it is not forgetfulness unless she has severe alzheimer's.

I am convinced that she is sick in the head, for almost 2 years she has used my child to punnish me at almost a weekly frequency. My child is the one that suffers, bothers me, makes me hate her more, but my child bears the brunt each week.

Thanks

Duped

[jlalex]

Hm..well I guess you could try taking her to court and getting an order, but that would probably be a waste of time and money..even if a judge ordered it sounds like she wouldn't comply anyways.

What about circumventing her completely and take to the teacher each week. I know in my kids school the have agendas..perhaps your son could write down the dates of these events and you can keep track of them that way.

I know this is tough..and I don't know why some ex's are oblivious to the fact that what they are doing is hurting their own children..not to mention damaging their own relationship with that child..kids don't forget but they do grow up and those are memories I wouldn't want my child walking around with.

Otherwise you could try talking to her but it sounds like she's got her head to far up her butt to hear you anyways.

[Denisem]

School

You can ask the school to send a copy of all trips to you....they will do this.
Teachers are very helpful when you ask.....so I would ask the school office for copies of reports, newsletters and trips. Schools are great for this as long as you ask.

[GGG]

I suggest asking the teacher for their e-mail address. You can e-mail the teacher before your child goes to you, asking for the requirements of the week. The teachers I have talked to really like to see the parents involved. In the long run, it makes their job easier and the child better prepared.

[FL_Needs_To_Change]

My husband sent self-addressed envelopes to the daughter's school. They sent newsletters directly to him and any planned outings as well.
No cost to the school, no problem for the teacher to pop the letter in an envelope and mail it. Just as easy as handing them out to the students. He never missed an opportunity to attend functions as a chaperon or meeting. And we are over 12 hrs return trip away. Always have advance notice of parent teacher interviews etc. I’d give this a try or make a call if you are in close proximity to the school and ask for notification vie email or telephone as we have email notification as well.