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  • Right to First Refusal and Police Enforcement clauses for settlement.

    My ex and I have been asked by the Judge to create one working draft for settlement which includes clauses that we agree to and clauses that we don't with each adding comments on these sections we don't agree to. We have until the next settlement conference in January.

    Due to recent events, I wanted to include a Right to first refusal and a police enforcement clause.

    Right to first refusal:
    My ex current has no support system in our local area. In the case of child care, I would like the right of first refusal so that he may have access to both his mother, father and extended family..blah blah..suggestion please!

    Police Enforcement:
    Not sure how to make an Ontario Family Court enforcement clause. Any suggestion would be appreciated.

    I have included the following clause for cases of illness, any suggestion on how to make this work would so help:

    In case of Illness:
    Each parent is responsible for tending to Jordan and providing care for him when he is sick.
    Based on Jordan’s access schedule, the parent with whom Jordan resides with on any given day is responsible for:
    a. Making alternate arrangement for Jordan’s care.
    b. Inform the alternate parent of Jordan’s condition and of any changes.

    If Jordan is hospitalized for any reason, the residential parent is responsible for contacting the alternate parent or caregivers as soon as possible.

  • #2
    Also, as my ex's father has now denied access to my son, I would like to add a clause for 3rd party transportation which excludes him.

    This is what I currently have, any suggestions/ideas would be greatly apprecaited:

    Transportation:
    The residential parent or caregiver for any given day is responsible for transporting Jordan to and from school, child care and other activities, unless otherwise agreed upon by both parents.

    For all out of town visits, it is the responsibility of the requesting parent (with whom Jordan is travelling) to provide transportation to and from the visit.

    Comment


    • #3
      What a sad story (again) that parents have to resort to police involvement in their children's lives in order to enforce access. That's good for kids.

      Comment


      • #4
        Not really. It's more introducing what is possible if the order is not followed.

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        • #5
          A little matuity on the part of the adults will help to realize that police involvement is not good for kids. Too bad, so very sad, love Dad.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by dadtotheend View Post
            What a sad story (again) that parents have to resort to police involvement in their children's lives in order to enforce access. That's good for kids.
            What's more in the best interests of the child, the ability to exercise their parenting time with each parent without interference of the other parent, or having the police involved to enforce a court order. IMO, the answer is clear and has been determined over and over again that it is in the child's best interests to maintain a relationship with both parents.

            And should the police need to be involved, who's fault is that? The person trying to exercise the parenting time, or the person who is creating the conflict?

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by dadtotheend View Post
              A little matuity on the part of the adults will help to realize that police involvement is not good for kids. Too bad, so very sad, love Dad.
              Agreed, but there are situations and scenarios where such clauses are necessary evils.

              If I was being denied access on multiple occasions, for reasons which are arbitrary or non-existant, I would for sure get an enforcement clause. Such clause is an effective shield vs being denied access, but should not be used as a sword.

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              • #8
                Again, it's all nice and good to spout maturity, however if it was that simple, I would not have received the application in the first place.

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by Pharah View Post
                  Transportation:
                  The residential parent or caregiver for any given day is responsible for transporting Jordan to and from school, child care and other activities, unless otherwise agreed upon by both parents..
                  Is Grandpa refusing access more than just this recent one day? - be careful not to cut off your nose to spite your face (what a strange saying - thanks to my mom for that one)... How do you enforce this? Say the child's mom emails and says that her father will be dropping your child off today. Do you then refuse because you don't want Grandpa involved? That's not the best for your child. Do you have to email mom for agreement for your spouse to pick/up or drop/off? What are the reasons that agreement to alternate transport agreement could be withheld? Sounds like an impossible clause to me.

                  Wouldn't the enforcement clause keep grandpa from ever denying access again?

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                  • #10
                    According to grandpa, 'the court has not jurisdiction over him'. His words.

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                    • #11
                      The out of town visits will be taken care of if you state a pick up/ drop off point in your agreement. If the switch point is mom's house then you would never have to get your child at grandpa's home. Mom would be responsible to have the child ready at her home - or better yet make the exchange point school/daycare and avoid any problems with out of town visits.

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                      • #12
                        I really would jut like some feedback on the clauses, not another debate...hence the new thread.

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                        • #13
                          Lumpy: We currently have the school as the switch point but that is currently not used for days when he is not at school or daycare but yes, that would resolve a lot of issues. Thanks for the suggestion.

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                          • #14
                            What is the schedule? Perhaps you could look at lumping the days together so that every switch point is at daycare/school. If you are asked why you would like to change the access schedule you can then site that Grandpa has refused you access etc.

                            You would probably be best trying to figure out what you don't like about your current arrangement and try to find ways around the problems rather than make up rules about parental agreement. If the other side is unreasonable then you will end up with the same problems. If you find ways to negate the problems then it will be a lot easier in the end.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Our current access rotates on a weekly basis with an overnight switch day visit on Monday or Tuesday the non-custodial parent with exchanges done at school or daycare.

                              This works when my son is in school/daycare (he goes to PLASP) however has been random when he is not, hence the frustration this summer.

                              Comment

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