Ottawa Divorce .com Forums


User CP

New posts

Advertising

  Ottawa Divorce .com Forums > Main Category > Divorce & Family Law

Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools
  #1  
Old 01-12-2012, 09:57 AM
dkarmour dkarmour is offline
Junior Member
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Toronto
Posts: 12
dkarmour is on a distinguished road
Default Ex is refusing Child Support

Currently redoing the seperation agreement with my ex. I have the kids 50% of the time, 1 week on 1 week off. Without getting into any of the details she is refusing to accept the child support. I am suppose to pay net support and I do not have a problem with it. We have been divorced for 5 years but for the last 3 months she has been rejecting it. She says it is her right to refuse the money.

From what I have read she is not allow to do this. However, I cannot force her to accept the money what should I do? I am getting advice from my lawyer, I am curious on this forums feedback.
  #2  
Old 01-12-2012, 10:16 AM
Berner_Faith Berner_Faith is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Ontario
Posts: 3,298
Berner_Faith will become famous soon enough
Default

I would write out a cheque and send it by registered mail, where she must sign for it. Whether she cashes it or not, you then have proof that she has received it.

Or bank the money in a separate account every month, send her an email saying you have the CS ready to send to her, can she please let you know when is a good time to exchange or how she would like it exchanged. This is evidence that you have attempted to pay, shall she decide to take you to court down the road.

The worst this you can do is not attempt or bank the money every month... even if she says don't worry about it and is refusing, keep trying and banking...you don't want to be arrears should she attempt to pull a fast one on you.
  #3  
Old 01-12-2012, 10:25 AM
dkarmour dkarmour is offline
Junior Member
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Toronto
Posts: 12
dkarmour is on a distinguished road
Default

I send the CS through Interac email banking so that I do have a electronc footprint. As well when she rejects the payment I receive an email back which I have filed away. Regarding the money it is currently in my savings account untouched but the amount is piling up. So I am doing what you have suggested.

But this action can't and should not go forever.

We have gone through mediation to resolve holidays and this issue. My last email to the mediator I wrote:

It is my understanding that the support amount must be reasonable and in the best interests of the children and if a zero amount is placed in the Separation Agreement that the courts would require a justification. I am willing to have an additional meeting if required to discuss what amount of child support would be acceptable.

So basically I am unwilling to provide 0 and if she refuse then she said explain why. I do not want this issue of non-payment coming back to bite when I am trying to do the right thing.
  #4  
Old 01-12-2012, 10:37 AM
Berner_Faith Berner_Faith is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Ontario
Posts: 3,298
Berner_Faith will become famous soon enough
Default

Another thing you can do is set up an RESP and every time she refuses the money put it in there...then like I said, if she does try to come back on you, you are able to argue that because she did not accept the money you invested it for your childs future.

Sounds like you are on the right track...just keep saving and if she keeps refusing, when the child turns 18, think of the money the children will have for post secondary because of your smart saving.
  #5  
Old 01-12-2012, 10:48 AM
billm's Avatar
billm billm is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 2,431
billm is on a distinguished road
Default

Umm,

First you want to cover yourself. And put the money away I suppose is a good idea, then you can gift it to the child when they are no longer a child of the marriage.

It's hard to have an opinion on this as we don't know the age of the child or the incomes of the two of you, BUT it seems to me that it is reasonable for her to feel that she does not want your money in her house - that she is more than capable of raising the child equally with you without your money.

I just went on a date with someone who had 50/50 and her ex made more, but they don't do CS or SS, and she was fine with that (it was her idea). Actually, it made me respect her more.

I wouldn't want my ex's money either, unless perhaps there was a big difference in standard of living etc, but even then, I am capable of taking care of my kids myself on my half time - I wouldn't want her money, except for shared expenses.
  #6  
Old 01-12-2012, 10:50 AM
dkarmour dkarmour is offline
Junior Member
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Toronto
Posts: 12
dkarmour is on a distinguished road
Default

Thanks, I was going to start a RESP for the kids now that my own personal finances have been right sided. I will discuss with my lawyer and a tax planner.
  #7  
Old 01-12-2012, 11:05 AM
dkarmour dkarmour is offline
Junior Member
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Toronto
Posts: 12
dkarmour is on a distinguished road
Default

Billm - the ages of my kids are 12 and 7.

Regarding income is a whole new conversation. She basically is living on benefits and does not need to. I have the kids 50/50 and was not taking my child benefits and she was taking it all; from the eyes of the gov't it look like she had the kids 100% of time. From advice from family and friends they said you need to claim your portion of the benefits and it does not matter how much you get, you have the kids half the time and you are entitiled to it.

I gave her a year to let her know what my plans were, she asked me not to do it but I said I will because I need to make sure my finances are in order with the gov't. Her child benefits dropped, and I suspect she was claiming other benefits because it appeared she had the kids 100% of the time. But that is not my issue.

I do not want her coming back to me for non-payment so I will discuss with my lawyer and may put it in RESP as suggested by someone else.
  #8  
Old 01-12-2012, 11:18 AM
billm's Avatar
billm billm is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 2,431
billm is on a distinguished road
Default

Yes I finally registered to child benefits after 3 years apart - my ex was mad at me (as she is with most things), but I was paying proper CS and was entitled to the benefit. The CRA says you have to tell them what is going on with the kids, so that is what I did - keep things above board.

Mostly though, despite paying offset CS and having kids half the time, I have been constantly rejected for declaring a dependent, which I should be allowed to do, and filing for child benefits I believe will help my case.
  #9  
Old 01-12-2012, 11:23 AM
dkarmour dkarmour is offline
Junior Member
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Toronto
Posts: 12
dkarmour is on a distinguished road
Default

Billm - Will then we understand each other; have to keep things above board.

I am not happy that I am unable to claim one of the kids as a dependant or claim tax credits; such as the physcial activity one ... I pay for the YMCA membership. It is a bit unfair if you have the kids 50/50, pay net support and unable to use any of the tax credits for dependants.
  #10  
Old 01-12-2012, 11:26 AM
billm's Avatar
billm billm is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 2,431
billm is on a distinguished road
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by dkarmour View Post
Billm - Will then we understand each other; have to keep things above board.

I am not happy that I am unable to claim one of the kids as a dependant or claim tax credits; such as the physcial activity one ... I pay for the YMCA membership. It is a bit unfair if you have the kids 50/50, pay net support and unable to use any of the tax credits for dependants.
Some people in our situation HAVE claimed a dependent.

To me it is all about this note for who can't claim a dependent on the CRA website - if this note is not talking about offset CS in a 50/50 situation, then what situation are they trying to talk about??

"Note If you and another person were required to make support payments for the child for 2011 and, as a result, no one would be entitled to claim the amount for an eligible dependant for the child, you can still claim this amount provided you and the other person(s) paying support agree that you will be the one making the claim. If you cannot agree on who will claim this amount for the child, neither of you can make the claim."
Closed Thread


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Children's bennefits Wiser2008 Financial Issues 21 05-03-2019 06:21 AM
Waive Child Support - is this possible? donnel8 Divorce & Family Law 4 02-24-2011 03:58 PM
Notional Grossed Up Child Support Amount? Gary M Financial Issues 12 01-06-2011 05:23 PM
paying child support without a court order Roni Divorce & Family Law 18 09-18-2010 07:47 PM
When child support ends... paris Financial Issues 3 04-23-2010 10:04 PM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 11:13 PM.