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Parenting Issues This forum is for discussing any of the parenting issues involved in your divorce, including parenting of step-children.

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  #1  
Old 10-30-2019, 11:42 AM
iona6656 iona6656 is offline
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Default Getting SIN copy- other parent refuses to give it

We are setting up RESP to be held jointly with the Canadian Scholarship Trust.

Rep from CST needs it. Dad sends it to rep by email- but does not copy me.

Final order states that custodial mom keeps birth certificate, health card, and passport. Dad is to have copy where available.

I have D3's birth certificate. Ex has an official copy. I have her health card- but it goes with her whenever she's there.

I didn't realize Ex had kept her SIN info until we were setting up RESP. He says he doesn't have time to find it- and it's just a number- he'll give it to me, but he's keeping the card (or letter? I don't know what it is).

Clearly this is a power play.

If I have the number- is there any reason I need the original letter or card? (edited to add: I am find just having a copy...unless there's some reason I shouldn't be okay with a copy?)

According to the gov't of Canada. If I report it lost/stolen- she has to get a new one. Does that affect her RESPs already in place?

TLDR: Dad has SIN letter. Says he doesn't have time to find it to give it to me.

Last edited by iona6656; 10-30-2019 at 12:09 PM.
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  #2  
Old 10-30-2019, 12:13 PM
dad2bandm dad2bandm is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by iona6656 View Post
We are setting up RESP to be held jointly with the Canadian Scholarship Trust.

Rep from CST needs it. Dad sends it to rep by email- but does not copy me.

Final order states that custodial mom keeps birth certificate, health card, and passport. Dad is to have copy where available.

I have D3's birth certificate. Ex has an official copy. I have her health card- but it goes with her whenever she's there.

I didn't realize Ex had kept her SIN info until we were setting up RESP. He says he doesn't have time to find it- and it's just a number- he'll give it to me, but he's keeping the card (or letter? I don't know what it is).

Clearly this is a power play.

If I have the number- is there any reason I need the original letter or card?

According to the gov't of Canada. If I report it lost/stolen- she has to get a new one. Does that affect her RESPs already in place?

TLDR: Dad has SIN letter. Says he doesn't have time to find it to give it to me.

If you have the number, and he gave you the correct number, that's all you need. They don't provide a plastic card anymore, that I know of. It's simply a letter confirming your SIN number.


Dad is able to give it to RESP rep, but doesn't have time to find it for you. Sure. lol.


Circumvent Dad, and you could simply request the CST rep to photocopy/print it for you. I assume it's a JOINT RESP.

Last edited by dad2bandm; 10-30-2019 at 12:15 PM. Reason: You could get the CST rep to photocopy/print it for you.
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Old 10-30-2019, 12:17 PM
dad2bandm dad2bandm is offline
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FYI, sounds like you already have this planned, and perhaps the RESP stuff, was even outlined in some agreement or order...?


But, personally, I would not contribute to a JOINT RESP. Nothing stops you from opening your own RESP, for your child, and making your contributions there. (not wanting to rock the boat...)
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Old 10-30-2019, 12:23 PM
iona6656 iona6656 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dad2bandm View Post
If you have the number, and he gave you the correct number, that's all you need. They don't provide a plastic card anymore, that I know of. It's simply a letter confirming your SIN number.
The problem is that I don't know if it's the right number because he said he'll just send the number, but doesn't want to give me the letter....he says "if you have the number, you don't need the letter. I'll keep it safe".

Maybe the answer is just to get a confirmation of the number through government of canada- without reporting it lost or stolen?
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Old 10-30-2019, 12:26 PM
dad2bandm dad2bandm is offline
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But he provided it to the RESP rep too, so do you think he would provide the wrong number to the actual company administering your RESP? That would be an entirely different issue, but I'm sure it's the right number if it matches what they were provided with?
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  #6  
Old 10-30-2019, 12:38 PM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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Tell him to provide you with either the email he sent to his RESP rep or permission to contact that rep for the number.

If he refuses, tell him you expect to receive a copy of the letter within 24 hours or you will be calling to report it missing and requesting a new one which will impact his RESP if he has one.

Also, as soon as you get it, open your own damn RESP to get the grant money. If he has opened his own he has gotten the grant money from the govt.
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Old 10-30-2019, 12:49 PM
iona6656 iona6656 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rockscan View Post
T
Also, as soon as you get it, open your own damn RESP to get the grant money. If he has opened his own he has gotten the grant money from the govt.
This was a long rigmarole thing about the RESPs (plural)

Both of our dumbass lawyers wrote into the final order that the RESP money to be transferred from his share of the sale of the matrimonial home was to be held jointly. However, all the major banks only allow joint subscription if you are married or common law. And withdrawal is "either or". Neither of us trusts the other not to be able to drain the RESP....it took forever to figure out. BUT - CST allows it in our case because of the order. And the good thing is that we don't have to get together or make any decisions about the RESP.

So we split the rest of the RESP room. And we each have our own contribution RESP for her. So now she has 3 RESPs.
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Old 10-30-2019, 12:55 PM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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Ah ok. Joint ones arenít so bad though. Itís just difficult if your ex wants to stall or not answer.
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Old 10-30-2019, 01:19 PM
iona6656 iona6656 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rockscan View Post
Ah ok. Joint ones arenít so bad though. Itís just difficult if your ex wants to stall or not answer.
That is what is nice about using the CST. Because it's a group plan. We don't have to worry about authorizing changes or saying "yes- we're sitll happy with this level of investment". We are signing something that says that if she's 21- and doesn't go to school- the principle will be released back to her- along with the interest (minus fees of course).

They've worked out what our remaining contribution limit is so we both get the grant money evenly.
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Old 10-30-2019, 01:34 PM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by iona6656 View Post
They've worked out what our remaining contribution limit is so we both get the grant money evenly.

The first thing my husband did after divorce was figure out how much he may be on the hook for and dumped it into an RESP. He got all the grant money. His ex is LIVID that he did this as her share of the expense is high and she has been adamant that the kids pay very little. Jokes on her now though as the judge said husband doesnít have to pay more than he is obligated and his RESP is his to use.
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