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  • #31
    My husband was successful in getting his ex an imputed income.

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    • #32
      Your husband is my new hero

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      • #33
        to the OP: You have a right to be upset. The dentist had no right to increase payments, that is why they are called "pre-authorized withdrawals". I'm guessing you'll have that fixed today though.

        Please get your agreement changed to reflect this problem. The ex should not be able to force you to pay for braces when you can't afford it and it isn't MEDICALLY necessary. It sounds like you and your husband are fully willing to pay for braces for the second child, when you can manage it financially, and it was not anticipated until the other child is out of braces. That makes sense. You aren't denying the child the braces, just to wait a little while.

        You have sain some NASTY things about the ex, but I am guessing that you are venting your frustration here, rather than to your husband or family. Everyone needs someplace to vent, and this forum is a good place, we all know what you are going through. I think some of the reactions here assumed that you were venting IRL as well. Maybe in the future you could mention that you are venting here and not at home? That isn't something that needs to be clarified, but it might help to prevent others from assuming the worst??

        I hope you can get this straightened out quickly. What a horrible time for her to choose to impose this extra expense...Christmas!

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        • #34
          Originally posted by got2bkid View Post
          representingself "But I disagree with a NCP's decision to have more children, if s/he can not or will not continue to contribute financially to his/her first family, at the same rate s/he was paying BEFORE s/he decided to have more children."

          Herein lies the problem. His CS has gone from $600/month when we first had kids together, to $1000/month (ordered higher than guideline amount), plus extra expenses of $400 (now for teeth), $300 (access costs), $160/month medical and dental. He now has to give $1860/month. Why you ask? A free lawyer got a hold of her and told her about all her "entitlements", and she bought in hook-line-and-sinker. And our kids that were born when only $600 left the house? They don't count.

          It really bugs me when people say "well you shoulda known" Whatever! The fact is the CP should HAVE to support their kids financially if they are able. Why do they get the choice to live off CS and make their kids poor? If the dad has to keep the kids "at the pre-divorce level" and the mom uses that money for her self, where is her responsibility to "keep the kids at pre-divorce level" also?

          The whole thing is a farce when you are getting screwed over like my husband is, and see your ex wife making choices that keep your kids in poverty because she only lives off HIS income. I'm not really in the mood to sugar coat it for you. The lazy B$tch takes more than 1/2 his salary. Hey I work to support my kids and to help pay for this lazy useless cult follower, so I can call her whatever I like.

          And don't worry about yourself over how this affects our household. I am venting on this site, but my home and family are precious and kept seperate from this!

          Thanks to Independantgal and others for your support and understanding. My husband is going to try to resolve things with the dentist. The ex? She'll tell my husband that I (yes - me) should work more if we can't afford it. Yes, that is her attitude LOL, it never enters her mind that perhaps SHE should support her own children.
          My ex has had several kids after ours, works for cash, collects support tax free, CTB tax free and lives in gov't housing paying approx. 400 a month in rent for a 3 bedroom all inclusive. Her disposible income surpasses mine. I work, so does my current wife, we have a young child and wish to have more but cannot afford it despite both of us working full time. We had to pay thousands for legal fees, we pay for daycare and all of our expenses and receive a minimal amount back in CTB due to our incomes. But yet, my ex is the impovrished one. She receives a good chunk of change from me just based on child support, it doesn't include my contribution to her gov't money via my and my wife's taxes.

          The CS system is not fair. CS goes up automatically when income increases yet I have to go to court and sustain legal fees in the thousands to decrease it when I lose my job, as I had a month ago, thereby decreasing my income by almost 75%. I often dream about winning the lottery and finally changing the case law by setting a presedent by taking my case all the way to the supreme court. Each time we've gone to court so far I had to settle, despite knowing I would win had we gone to trial, because I simply did not have the money for trial. The last set of court conferences we've had, lasting two years thanks to the ex's gov't paid lawyer, cost me over 10K without going to trial.

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          • #35
            My ex has had several kids after ours, works for cash, collects support tax free, CTB tax free and lives in gov't housing paying approx. 400 a month in rent for a 3 bedroom all inclusive. Her disposible income surpasses mine. I work, so does my current wife, we have a young child and wish to have more but cannot afford it despite both of us working full time. We had to pay thousands for legal fees, we pay for daycare and all of our expenses and receive a minimal amount back in CTB due to our incomes. But yet, my ex is the impovrished one. She receives a good chunk of change from me just based on child support, it doesn't include my contribution to her gov't money via my and my wife's taxes.
            Unless she is defrauding the system, or unless ON has drastically different laws for income assistance, she'd be getting a reduced assistance cheque. Support comes off dollar for dollar from income assistance. (at least in NB it does.)

            The CS system is not fair. CS goes up automatically when income increases yet I have to go to court and sustain legal fees in the thousands to decrease it when I lose my job, as I had a month ago, thereby decreasing my income by almost 75%.
            Ouch. Does your support order lay out a specific figure or indicate "based on table amount?". Perhaps you could send an offer to have the support adjusted annually based off the prior year's income tax return. I realize it wouldn't do anything for you during the fiscal year you lose your job in, but it WOULD allow you to recover for the following year.

            Try to put it to your ex so she sees if you get raises/promotions then she winds up getting even MORE money from you. (Try not to mention the reverse)

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