Ok, here is a question I have. When a parent uses physiological (now I'm not doctor) on a child, why do docotrs or CAS say it's not abuse, do I need a seccond opinion, or am I just sensitive. Eample:
Children come home and when on the topic of "strangers", my older son pipes up and says, "mom says you left us for that woman, and to feed that whore's son"
When after the children where home with me for an extended time, they'd of course, like they do when they come home to dad's talk about their time here. My younger boy would either call my wife by her name, or step mom or yes even sometimes he slips and says mom. She freaks, tells them not to call her that, then he would call her "my step mom", he would get yelled at for that, finally he would use her first name, not allowed to use that name either. Anyway, when talking about a board game that we play as a family quite frequently, she told my younger son, who's 6, if you like it some much there then get the F out, pack your bags, go live with your father then.
She constantly tells them that they only have one home, with her, that they only 'visit' me, we of course tell them that our home is there home, and it's okay to have 2 homes. She constantly tells them that there is only 3 in my boys family, her and my 2 boys, we tell them that they have many in thier family, including their mother.
Anyway, the list goes on and on, and can deal with the vast majority of it, but what the heck do I do about the other? I met with my doctor who is the children's doctor and my ex's. I mentioned this too him, he's well aware of her medical past. He tells my that though it's sickening, there is no physical abuse! Okay, but what about physiological abuse...nope nothing he can really do, except maybe have a 'chat' with her.
So, I thought I would make a call for information only, went over the scenario, and they were not overly interested. Is it because it's mainly directed at me, my wife or her son, that it seems okay, kids talk to each other, and when they come here and repeat this crap, my step son hears this and it tears, wondering what he ever did to my child's mother as he takes it personally. We of course talk to him and reassure him that he did nothing wrong. But heck, it's been almost 4 years, she just can't/won't get over it.
I can't help but wonder in my male, conspiracy laden and angry father's mind that if the tables were turned, would it be the same answers? Is there anyway to deal with this crap, or should I just let it go and document, which I've already done.
Children come home and when on the topic of "strangers", my older son pipes up and says, "mom says you left us for that woman, and to feed that whore's son"
When after the children where home with me for an extended time, they'd of course, like they do when they come home to dad's talk about their time here. My younger boy would either call my wife by her name, or step mom or yes even sometimes he slips and says mom. She freaks, tells them not to call her that, then he would call her "my step mom", he would get yelled at for that, finally he would use her first name, not allowed to use that name either. Anyway, when talking about a board game that we play as a family quite frequently, she told my younger son, who's 6, if you like it some much there then get the F out, pack your bags, go live with your father then.
She constantly tells them that they only have one home, with her, that they only 'visit' me, we of course tell them that our home is there home, and it's okay to have 2 homes. She constantly tells them that there is only 3 in my boys family, her and my 2 boys, we tell them that they have many in thier family, including their mother.
Anyway, the list goes on and on, and can deal with the vast majority of it, but what the heck do I do about the other? I met with my doctor who is the children's doctor and my ex's. I mentioned this too him, he's well aware of her medical past. He tells my that though it's sickening, there is no physical abuse! Okay, but what about physiological abuse...nope nothing he can really do, except maybe have a 'chat' with her.
So, I thought I would make a call for information only, went over the scenario, and they were not overly interested. Is it because it's mainly directed at me, my wife or her son, that it seems okay, kids talk to each other, and when they come here and repeat this crap, my step son hears this and it tears, wondering what he ever did to my child's mother as he takes it personally. We of course talk to him and reassure him that he did nothing wrong. But heck, it's been almost 4 years, she just can't/won't get over it.
I can't help but wonder in my male, conspiracy laden and angry father's mind that if the tables were turned, would it be the same answers? Is there anyway to deal with this crap, or should I just let it go and document, which I've already done.
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