I need some advice regarding division of assets and spousal support. I am originally from Asia. In 2001, I and my older daughter from previous marriage moved with my husband to Canada because of his work. Our son was born soon after we moved. From there my marriage went downhill. He was emotionally abusive, angry, and had affairs with other women. I could not take my career seriously because he worked long hours and travelled about a week each month. I was studying, making some money in part time temporary jobs, and taking care of the children. He makes a three-digit salary in a very secure and stable corporate job. He used money to manipulate and abuse me and took 3-4 times more money for himself. He even took some money from the joint line of credit. There is more detail but I won't post it here.
We separated last year after 12 years of marriage. He requested 50/50 custody of our younger son, which I agreed to. He told the older daughter, a full time student, to leave the house the day we decided to separate and she now lives with me. We have not yet finished our separation agreement. I got a job but I am making a lot less than I need to live and feed the children. He does not pay financial support and I’ve been using joint credit cards for living expenses and now he stopped paying the credit card. I have some of my own credit but our initial agreement was that he helps with living expenses.
I need to understand how I can best protect my children and myself. I have a lawyer but not convinced he is trying his best. What strategies can I use to make the ex agree to the conditions that will allow me to have a good start in my new life? For example, my lawyer proposed 45-55 reapportionment of the house assets as a compensation for lost opportunities but the ex refused. Given that I essentially put my career on hold for a dozen years and I was mostly responsible for renovating and raising the house value, can I expect it? How do I negotiate spousal support? Is monthly or lump some preferred? I had to take on drafting the separation agreement – can I have the costs shared?
Any practical advice would be much appreciated.
We separated last year after 12 years of marriage. He requested 50/50 custody of our younger son, which I agreed to. He told the older daughter, a full time student, to leave the house the day we decided to separate and she now lives with me. We have not yet finished our separation agreement. I got a job but I am making a lot less than I need to live and feed the children. He does not pay financial support and I’ve been using joint credit cards for living expenses and now he stopped paying the credit card. I have some of my own credit but our initial agreement was that he helps with living expenses.
I need to understand how I can best protect my children and myself. I have a lawyer but not convinced he is trying his best. What strategies can I use to make the ex agree to the conditions that will allow me to have a good start in my new life? For example, my lawyer proposed 45-55 reapportionment of the house assets as a compensation for lost opportunities but the ex refused. Given that I essentially put my career on hold for a dozen years and I was mostly responsible for renovating and raising the house value, can I expect it? How do I negotiate spousal support? Is monthly or lump some preferred? I had to take on drafting the separation agreement – can I have the costs shared?
Any practical advice would be much appreciated.
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