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Correction to birth certificate...missing father info

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  • #16
    I should mention, all of these "offers" were done over the course of April, and now May.
    Last edited by dad2bandm; 05-17-2013, 08:47 AM. Reason: Typo correction.

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    • #17
      Originally posted by Tayken View Post
      ...
      Serve two copies of the offer to settle and documentation.
      ...
      Hmm..what is the significance of this, or why? I couldn't see this mentioned in Rule 18.

      Does this mean serve at least twice? Is this meant for a copy for lawyer as well? We have a final order, and court was in the past. So we don't have a lawyer of record anymore, for either of us, or an active court application.

      I noticed one of the registered letters was signed by her "boyfriend", that she lives with. Which is why I followed up with email as well. If I notice she gets the boyfriend to always sign now, is that a problem for me? (this is why I use the ReadNotify.com email follow-up as well, to show I sent via that method, and it shows when she has read the email (or not)).

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      • #18
        Originally posted by dad2bandm View Post
        Hmm..what is the significance of this, or why? I couldn't see this mentioned in Rule 18.
        Simply so she can keep a true original copy of the documentation with your signature and she can sign one back with her signature. Furthermore, in accordance with Rule 18 the offer has to be signed by you and your lawyer if you have one. If it isn't signed in accordance with Rule 18 you can't leverage it on a costs award. There is jurisprudence to this effect. I can dig it out if you need it.

        Originally posted by dad2bandm View Post
        Does this mean serve at least twice? Is this meant for a copy for lawyer as well? We have a final order, and court was in the past. So we don't have a lawyer of record anymore, for either of us, or an active court application.
        No, it means to serve once with two copies.

        Your covering letter should read something like:

        Dear Person:

        Please find enclosed an Offer to Settle made in accordance with Rule 18 of the Family Law Rules.

        I kindly ask that if you are in agreement with the conditions of this Offer to Settle to please sign one copy of the Offer to Settle and necessary attached schedules in blue ink and return this copy to me via registered mail to my (address) provided.

        This Offer to Settle will remain open until one minute prior to the commencement of any motion and/or trial or withdrawn by me in in writing.

        Yours very truly,
        Your name

        Rule 18 can be leveraged at any time really. Making offers to settle matters is a good thing to do. Rule 18 was put in place to assist parties in making reasonable offers to settle and to encourage settlement.

        Originally posted by dad2bandm View Post
        I noticed one of the registered letters was signed by her "boyfriend", that she lives with. Which is why I followed up with email as well. If I notice she gets the boyfriend to always sign now, is that a problem for me? (this is why I use the ReadNotify.com email follow-up as well, to show I sent via that method, and it shows when she has read the email (or not)).
        When you send the mail registered I am not sure if you can request that it be serviced only to the indented recipient. You may want to have a service provider to personal service on her. I am not fond of this because it is odd to do. I don't think a judge would buy a "I didn't sign for it so I never got it" excuse considering her boyfriend singed for it. But, you never know what people will say in a court room. Honesty is often not the first policy of many before the family courts...

        Just a personal comment: You have serviced it twice now and through two channels (email and registered mail). Although email isn't part of the Rules for service of this kind of documentation you have served it enough upon the other party. No need to get too anxious.

        Also, remember that it isn't a huge issue in the scope of things really. There is a court order in place identifying you as a parent. That will trump any claim someone might make on the names registered on a birth certificate. Often, changes to the birth certificate are technical documentation issues. I don't recommend getting too engaged in conflict over it.

        You have served your materials. Be patient then follow up a request if they recieved the documentation. Possibly after the second attempt to resolve you should contact a lawyer to see about bringing a motion.

        It isn't a "material change in circumstance" really in my opinion... It could be "contempt" but, that is an extreme motion and not appropriate in my personal opinion for something like this. My personal opinion is that only the most highly conflicted litigants bring "contempt" motions for trivial matters such as these. (Remembering that contempt is a quasi criminal situation and quite different than a regular motion.)

        Good Luck!
        Tayken
        Last edited by Tayken; 05-17-2013, 11:27 AM.

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        • #19
          Originally posted by Tayken View Post
          Simply so she can keep a true original copy of the documentation with your signature and she can sign one back with her signature. Furthermore, in accordance with Rule 18 the offer has to be signed by you and your lawyer if you have one. If it isn't signed in accordance with Rule 18 you can't leverage it on a costs award. There is jurisprudence to this effect. I can dig it out if you need it.
          Ahh, I understand. Okay then. Perhaps, for future mailings, I will duplicate the included forms.

          I don't have a lawyer, and my signature is on everything, of this nature, that I mail/send her.

          Originally posted by Tayken View Post
          Please find enclosed an Offer to Settle made in accordance with Rule 18 of the Family Law Rules.

          I kindly ask that if you are in agreement with the conditions of this Offer to Settle...
          Is it good, or not, to reference the Family Law rules, and to write "Offer to Settle", etc...? With my particular ex, this tone of writing seems to cause more conflict. I'm sure, if I don't refer to these, it doesn't affect things, as long as my request is clear, in what I'm asking to settle?

          Originally posted by Tayken View Post
          It isn't a "material change in circumstance" really in my opinion... It could be "contempt" but, that is an extreme motion and not appropriate in my personal opinion for something like this...
          No, no...I wouldn't use contempt for this. I would use contempt for the refusal to provide her tax returns (ordered, in our order), or the deliberate repeated access interference times, if I was going to go the contempt route.

          Good side question though...if I have to address both of these kind of situations, can one do them in one? Or do you file seperate motions for the issues? Can one simply motion the order to be followed (in the case of ordered financial/tax exchanges), without it being a "motion of contempt", and also motion for birth certificate to be corrected, in one?

          Or do they prefer that to be seperated out (without it looking like a "motion" frenzy).

          I have a seperate thread, on getting signature as well (she's listed as "primary caregiver" - so her signature is required), in order for D4 to get all the CESG (RESP) grants, that she should be getting. Mom refuses to sign, and refuses to open a RESP on her own, in order for D4 to get them.

          So I put forth a similar offer (registered letter, followup email), with the signed forms, asking for her to sign them, over the last 3 months. So that is another thing I will have to ask, to get addressed.

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          • #20
            Originally posted by Tayken View Post
            ...
            If and only if the mother refuses to sign or doesn't sign within a reasonable amount of time after having been served the request you can (and should) bring a motion.
            ...
            So, to confirm I understand, in my reading of the rules/forms...

            Since we have a final court order already, and this is not a *change* to our order itself, I assume this would be a 14B then (and the other necessary 14 forms)? In reading the forms, and the rules, I understand this would not be a "Motion to change form 15"?

            I guess this would be a "procedural" or "uncomplicated" motion?

            I'm just reading up again, on this...in case I get no movement on my requests for her to sign (request to settle).

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            • #21
              My ex had the same issue. His name was not on his son's birth certificate and it made it very challenging with fighting for custody, getting a passport, etc. She had taken him to court stating that he was withholding her son from her. In the response, it was a question regarding the childs safety and a home study was requested and ordered by the court. In the response though, it was indicated that she had not put his name on the childs birth certificate and had refused to sign passport documents. She was ordered on a Tuesday to have his name on the birth certificate by that Friday and she was ordered to sign the passport documents right there in front of the judge.

              We had to show in emails that she was not forth coming and lied quite often and was not trustworthing. No communication on the telephone. Everything was polite, but by email so there was a trail. It was proven that she lied frequently about her wherabouts with the child and who was around the child as well. Since then in a court conference call, the judge gave him sole custody and she is allowed every second Christmas, every second March Break and three weeks in the summer, only if it's in the best interest of the child.

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              • #22
                Originally posted by dad2bandm View Post
                So, to confirm I understand, in my reading of the rules/forms...

                Since we have a final court order already, and this is not a *change* to our order itself, I assume this would be a 14B then (and the other necessary 14 forms)? In reading the forms, and the rules, I understand this would not be a "Motion to change form 15"?

                I guess this would be a "procedural" or "uncomplicated" motion?

                I'm just reading up again, on this...in case I get no movement on my requests for her to sign (request to settle).
                Just thought I'd ask this again, as I'm still unclear from reading the forms/rules.

                I want to motion to;
                - have Mom provide her signature, so that D4 can get access to the extra RESP grants she qualifies for - Mom will not provide signature
                - have me added to D4's birth registration as 'father' - Mom will not provide consent/signature, to have me added
                - request that ex provide her last year's tax return/NOA info (Mom never provides this - it is currently already ordered in our order for this to happen)

                The "last one", I guess I could use a contempt motion on it's own, since she refuses each year, with outright "no, I will not provide it" responses, but it's the first two items, that are more important.

                It's not a "change to our current order", so I assume I do not use any form 15s then?

                Comment

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