This was the first visit since we'd had custody (two years) after ex-gf finally completed alcohol & drug rehab program. We decided to allow Spring Break visitation, a short trial. She lives 1508 km away so alot of time was spent on the bus. She arrived to p/u the children and left stating she would take them to a Hotel because the bus back to her residence didn't leave until the next morning.
Everything seemed to be going okay, but it all came to light a few days later that all was not well...
1) ex-gf admittedly took the children to stay with her brother instead of a Hotel, not only did she lie to us. This compromised the safety of the children as her brother is a known illicit drug user and alcoholic, this is a breech of our custody agreement. After questioning the children I also discovered that she was repeatedly giving her brother money, she gave him over $30 to purchase her cigarettes and other items from the store and he returned broke and empty handed (Gee, wonder were that money went??)
2) ex-gf stated her CL bf was gonna be outta town working throughout visitation cause she knows we don't approve of him as he too is a known illicit drug user. When I called to check on the children to make sure they arrived okay, they informed me that the CL bf was present.
3) We requested the children to be returned in a timely fashion, so they don't miss school. We made sure return tickets were purchased before they were allowed to leave. However ex-gf purchased opened bus tickets and had no knowledge of the bus schedule, consequently the children arrived late and missed 3 days of school. They would have missed the whole week if we had not called and demanded she take them on the very next bus back home.
4) ex-gf stated she'd taken the week off work to spend time with the children. Upon their return the children said she had worked the whole time and their Maternal Grandmother looked after them during the day. She'd promised them she'd take them swimming and did not find time to do so while they were in her care.
We gave her happy & well adjusted children, but they returned with a different demeanor specifically the oldest child. It was like all the hard work we've put into them for the past 2 years trying to improve their self esteem, health and education... was all thwarted by this lunatic who filled their heads with empty promises and misconceptions.
A) She told them that she'd quit her job to be at home with them.
(If this was true, why didn't she even take one week off work for visitation?)
B) She promised to leave her CL bf and move closer to us.
(Her Mother and MCFD has tried everything to force her to leave CL for years)
C) She reported to the children that she fought very hard and lost the custody battle and they were forced to live with their Father.
(She requested closed court and gave us consentual custody)
When the children came home it was two weeks before they rekindled telephone contact with their Mother. The oldest child eventually handed the phone to DH and ex-gf requested to have the oldest child sent back to her as it was her opinion that he was not happy residing with us!
Now his 12 year old son has been brooding around the house since they came home and picking silly fights with his siblings. If this is what happens after one week of visitation... what is gonna happen after one month in summer??
Everything seemed to be going okay, but it all came to light a few days later that all was not well...
1) ex-gf admittedly took the children to stay with her brother instead of a Hotel, not only did she lie to us. This compromised the safety of the children as her brother is a known illicit drug user and alcoholic, this is a breech of our custody agreement. After questioning the children I also discovered that she was repeatedly giving her brother money, she gave him over $30 to purchase her cigarettes and other items from the store and he returned broke and empty handed (Gee, wonder were that money went??)
2) ex-gf stated her CL bf was gonna be outta town working throughout visitation cause she knows we don't approve of him as he too is a known illicit drug user. When I called to check on the children to make sure they arrived okay, they informed me that the CL bf was present.
3) We requested the children to be returned in a timely fashion, so they don't miss school. We made sure return tickets were purchased before they were allowed to leave. However ex-gf purchased opened bus tickets and had no knowledge of the bus schedule, consequently the children arrived late and missed 3 days of school. They would have missed the whole week if we had not called and demanded she take them on the very next bus back home.
4) ex-gf stated she'd taken the week off work to spend time with the children. Upon their return the children said she had worked the whole time and their Maternal Grandmother looked after them during the day. She'd promised them she'd take them swimming and did not find time to do so while they were in her care.
We gave her happy & well adjusted children, but they returned with a different demeanor specifically the oldest child. It was like all the hard work we've put into them for the past 2 years trying to improve their self esteem, health and education... was all thwarted by this lunatic who filled their heads with empty promises and misconceptions.
A) She told them that she'd quit her job to be at home with them.
(If this was true, why didn't she even take one week off work for visitation?)
B) She promised to leave her CL bf and move closer to us.
(Her Mother and MCFD has tried everything to force her to leave CL for years)
C) She reported to the children that she fought very hard and lost the custody battle and they were forced to live with their Father.
(She requested closed court and gave us consentual custody)
When the children came home it was two weeks before they rekindled telephone contact with their Mother. The oldest child eventually handed the phone to DH and ex-gf requested to have the oldest child sent back to her as it was her opinion that he was not happy residing with us!
Now his 12 year old son has been brooding around the house since they came home and picking silly fights with his siblings. If this is what happens after one week of visitation... what is gonna happen after one month in summer??
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