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Canlii - Dad gets Joint Custody of Son he didn't know existed.

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  • Canlii - Dad gets Joint Custody of Son he didn't know existed.

    Travel and relocation restrictions imposed on mother who left husband and didn't tell him she was pregnant.

    I find it ironic that it was he found out about his son only because she came back to Canada and applied for OW, who then forced her to notify him and seek support.

    Released June 11, 2015

    Naru v Naru, 2015 ONSC 3757 (CanLII)

    https://www.canlii.org/en/on/onsc/do...5onsc3757.html
    Last edited by YoungDad23; 06-12-2015, 04:30 PM. Reason: grammar

  • #2
    Joint Custody is meaningless are residency is shared. In Quebec you need SERIOUS grounds to deprive a parent of Parental Authority AS IT should be.

    She is basically a low income retail employee who will be collecting $$$$ from her engineer ex-husband. It is sad the father didn't ask to be a real part of his kid's life thinking he can change it later.... He doesn't know that this status quo is for the rest of the kids life and eventually he will lose the kid.... because anytime mom finds a man elsewhere or a job better than retail (what job isn't better than retail?) she will be allowed to move and he will see his kid twice a year. This is perfectly normal expected judgement - mom does WHATEVER (cults, supervised access etc...) to stop the dad from the seeing the kid, she STILL gets sole residency (I.e: 60+% residency) so dad keeps spitting out the cash, lawyers are paid, mom is paid, dad is a visitor.....

    Also note that the OCL recommended supervised access and the judge threw it out. These OCL people seem like jokers thank god I didn't have to deal with them.

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    • #3
      Nice that he was able to get some of the things the judge gave but I think the weekend access should have at least been a friday-sunday and some type of weekly access he gets very minimal access to the child even in the long term.

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      • #4
        Stuff like that makes me really despair of anybody having any sense. Parents give their children over to strangers for full days after very little transition on a regular basis.

        How has spending a full day with your DAD become more fraught with peril than spending a day at a new daycare?

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        • #5
          Originally posted by Dadx5 View Post
          Nice that he was able to get some of the things the judge gave but I think the weekend access should have at least been a friday-sunday and some type of weekly access he gets very minimal access to the child even in the long term.
          Agreed that this father didn't get as much access as he probably could have, especially since the son is now 6 years old.

          At least the mother wasn't successful in preventing the father from finding out that his son had been born. I was very happy to see the judge call her out in the order for trying to undermine, restrict or even totally eliminate this father from his child's life.

          As a father who was deprived of knowing his child had been born, and having no contact with him for the first several months of his life, I'm glad to see the tide is turning against mothers who go this far to exclude the other parent.

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          • #6
            Youngdad 23 I didn't know about my child for months. It may have taken me years but I know have my child primarily with me, and soon in court hopefully a huge change, so I do believe the tide is starting to turn on mothers who go to extreme to exclude the other parent.

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            • #7
              Originally posted by Rioe View Post
              Stuff like that makes me really despair of anybody having any sense. Parents give their children over to strangers for full days after very little transition on a regular basis.

              How has spending a full day with your DAD become more fraught with peril than spending a day at a new daycare?
              Such a good point. Kids are sent off to school, babysitters/daycare on a regular basis, yet the same parents that have no problem with this, have a problem with the children spending time with their other parent.

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              • #8
                Originally posted by Berner_Faith View Post
                Such a good point. Kids are sent off to school, babysitters/daycare on a regular basis, yet the same parents that have no problem with this, have a problem with the children spending time with their other parent.
                Yeah, I thought maybe I should make the argument that the difference is that the daycare provider has experience with children while the dad may not, but then I remembered being sent home from the hospital with a brand new infant and no idea what I was doing.

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                • #9
                  This isn't the turning of the tides. She should have lost custody

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Links17 View Post
                    This isn't the turning of the tides. She should have lost custody
                    Links, I don't know the details of your situation or what you have been through in family court but you need to find a way to let go of whatever has angered/hurt you so bad man. I feel negativity and bitterness in most of your posts and sorry to say this, it is UGLY and TOXIC.

                    The mother in this case couldn't "lose" custody since the father was seeking joint with unsupervised access. He was fine with the mother being the primary parent as long as his role as the child's father was preserved.

                    Instead of a win/lose proposition the judge chose the child's best interest, which I totally agree with:

                    "On the evidence, I find that as long as each parent respects the other’s parental role, the parties will continue to be able to jointly parent XXXXX as he grows and matures. The best interest of the child will be served if the parents continue to have joint custody. It is in the child’s best interest to have both parents fully involved in his life."

                    Should she have been held accountable for trying to cut the father out of the son's life? Of course she should and I think she has been, maybe not to the degree you or I think is appropriate but that's not the point.

                    The child now has both parents in his life and the mother cannot take off back to her home country without consequences.

                    Because some parents (fathers) on here don't seek or achieve what YOU think they should in family court they are not "losers" either. If my ex and I can come to the point where we can co-parent our son in a way that works for us then the magic numbers of 50/50 or 60/40 are irrelevant.

                    Not looking for an argument Links, just trying to give you some feedback. I may be young an naïve but being jaded and mean can't be much fun.

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                    • #11
                      The primary residence of the child shall be with the applicant mother. The residence of the child shall not be moved beyond a 30 kilometer area from his present residence, without the written consent of the respondent or court order.
                      -I will bet you a 1,000,000$ if this mom finds a better job out of town, or a husband out of town she will be allowed to relocate so moving is a non-issue. It would be her case to lose if either of two things were to be involved.

                      -The mother ASKED the judge to give her consent to travel without authorization and the judge refused. She can still go "visit" India.

                      ___________

                      I am not jaded - I am SOOOOO happy I got divorced when I did. I dodged a bullet, I see all these older people getting divorced and the type of support payments and what they have to do for their ex's and I thank my lucky stars I got out.

                      I see my kids probably more than I would if I even had 50/50 because I get them for the vast majority of their "out of school" time. My ex-wife periodically complains that I get them for all the weekends (while the lazy biatch stays home unemployed).

                      I feel sorry for other guys who didn't fight because they couldn't afford it, were scared, or the system was bias against them. I hope one day I can help them get what is best for the kids without having to go bankrupt paying lawyers.

                      I've been through to an appellate court where even though the judges admitted my ex-wife lied in court and that the judge of my divorce DID break the law they decided not to overturn it anyways. Imagine....

                      I got a joint psych assessment fully recommending shared custody only to have the judge decide that my age-level school kids being in daycare for 15 minutes a day was too long (while I commuted home from work) and because during the 1 year I had been kicked out of the house and the kids only saw me 12 hours a week without sleepovers would be too traumatic of a switch.

                      I've read so many cases, doctrine and jurisprudence this system has very little to do with fairness, justice or the law.

                      It is a private welfare system where mothers can do whatever they want whether it is abuse, alienation, lack of employment and the system will use the ex-husband to cover for them UNLESS the MOTHER IS COMPLETELY NUTS. Fathers on the other hand can lose custody for stupid things like having renovations going on...
                      Last edited by Links17; 06-13-2015, 10:09 PM.

                      Comment

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