Hi All and thank you to those who have made this site happen and contribute to it. It helps people and thats good.
I need guidance, suggestions and recommendations on my issue of how to successfully and fairly go about changing the amount of support given to recipient since i no longer have to pay child support.
Child has been kicked out of recipients home. Child is 19years old, works, and is finishing hs. So my obligations to recipient no longer apply, however I may be supporting child till they get on their feet.
Recipient is high conflict, suffers terribly with mental health issues and is currently on medical leave from a part time job.
Recipeient is asking for 2k a month ss. Its 100$ less than would have been getting with cs.
I have made an offer of $100 more a month to her current ss of 1260$ to 1360$.
This is based on the fact that I am making less in my new job, 15K a year. However i never changed the amount of support paid out until child moved out. I share expenses with my partner, am still paying off debt incurred from losses during our marriage and like i said make 15K less than i did when our separation agreement was signed. I took a lower paying job to secure job stability. I work full time. Recipient works part time, has not made effort in 4 years since separation to become financially independent, blaming that on childs(teenager) behaviour in the home. Claims it prevented her from seeking opportunity. The child during this time worked part time and went to school. So I have a difficult time accepting that reason. Does it make a difference?
I will not and can not negotiate with recipient. Been there done that and it didn't work. Ive been very clear to her about that. She is threatening and demanding. According to separation agreement we need to try to negotiate ourselves,which i have done, so I've upheld my responsibility. If not successful than mediation or arbitration will be required. She is taking a step ahead of that and threatening to sue n court. Do I need to file a motion of change without consent? Or can I sit back and wait for her to: a) get a lawyer and receive a letter from them? or : B) sit back and wait and see if she files a motion to change in court? In the meantime I continue to pay her ss based on the agreement.
In your experience how successful are the payor of ss in getting their amount lowered? And what is needed on my behalf to prove that I am being fair and paying what I can. I have been paying out close to half of my net pay for the last 4 years. Our agreement states she is paid ss indefinitely because of her age and length of marriage. I would think that now the child is no longer a dependant that she has to prove entitlement for more $, not me proving she doesn't? Is this correct? I need some guidance as to what would be the most effective way to settle this quickly and fairly. I have been clear to her that my offer of 1360$ is a take it or leave it offer. I know this is a long message and I welcome any feedback to trim it down in order to get answers.
Again my thanks to everyone on here for sharing, it really helps.
I need guidance, suggestions and recommendations on my issue of how to successfully and fairly go about changing the amount of support given to recipient since i no longer have to pay child support.
Child has been kicked out of recipients home. Child is 19years old, works, and is finishing hs. So my obligations to recipient no longer apply, however I may be supporting child till they get on their feet.
Recipient is high conflict, suffers terribly with mental health issues and is currently on medical leave from a part time job.
Recipeient is asking for 2k a month ss. Its 100$ less than would have been getting with cs.
I have made an offer of $100 more a month to her current ss of 1260$ to 1360$.
This is based on the fact that I am making less in my new job, 15K a year. However i never changed the amount of support paid out until child moved out. I share expenses with my partner, am still paying off debt incurred from losses during our marriage and like i said make 15K less than i did when our separation agreement was signed. I took a lower paying job to secure job stability. I work full time. Recipient works part time, has not made effort in 4 years since separation to become financially independent, blaming that on childs(teenager) behaviour in the home. Claims it prevented her from seeking opportunity. The child during this time worked part time and went to school. So I have a difficult time accepting that reason. Does it make a difference?
I will not and can not negotiate with recipient. Been there done that and it didn't work. Ive been very clear to her about that. She is threatening and demanding. According to separation agreement we need to try to negotiate ourselves,which i have done, so I've upheld my responsibility. If not successful than mediation or arbitration will be required. She is taking a step ahead of that and threatening to sue n court. Do I need to file a motion of change without consent? Or can I sit back and wait for her to: a) get a lawyer and receive a letter from them? or : B) sit back and wait and see if she files a motion to change in court? In the meantime I continue to pay her ss based on the agreement.
In your experience how successful are the payor of ss in getting their amount lowered? And what is needed on my behalf to prove that I am being fair and paying what I can. I have been paying out close to half of my net pay for the last 4 years. Our agreement states she is paid ss indefinitely because of her age and length of marriage. I would think that now the child is no longer a dependant that she has to prove entitlement for more $, not me proving she doesn't? Is this correct? I need some guidance as to what would be the most effective way to settle this quickly and fairly. I have been clear to her that my offer of 1360$ is a take it or leave it offer. I know this is a long message and I welcome any feedback to trim it down in order to get answers.
Again my thanks to everyone on here for sharing, it really helps.
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