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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #1  
Old 02-17-2016, 07:17 PM
Ottawasm Ottawasm is offline
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Default Police and court order enforcement.

Hey everyone.
Can someone explain to me what is a "non-police enforceable court order"?

We were denied visitation twice in a week. We involved the police yesterday and they refused any involvement as they say we have a "non-police enforceable court order". We have a Ontario Family Court order, valid and still current (new from August 2015) that is very clear on the custody schedule. The BM refused access without valid reason and with no offer of make up time as stated in our c.o.

I believed custody/visitation could be enforced by police when a party refused as per the Children's law reform and such.

I wanted to see if I was in the wrong before going to our lawyers and having to send another 2k away.
Thank you all in advance!
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Old 02-17-2016, 07:22 PM
YYZDaddy YYZDaddy is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ottawasm View Post
Hey everyone.
Can someone explain to me what is a "non-police enforceable court order"?

We were denied visitation twice in a week. We involved the police yesterday and they refused any involvement as they say we have a "non-police enforceable court order". We have a Ontario Family Court order, valid and still current (new from August 2015) that is very clear on the custody schedule. The BM refused access without valid reason and with no offer of make up time as stated in our c.o.

I believed custody/visitation could be enforced by police when a party refused as per the Children's law reform and such.

I wanted to see if I was in the wrong before going to our lawyers and having to send another 2k away.
Thank you all in advance!
Unfortunately orders are not enforceable unless they explicitly state they are. Even then, police have been known to refuse to intervene.
It's a touchy subject with police. They are there to keep the peace, protect the public, etc. Sadly, parents are often left by the curb.

Record the incident, establish a pattern, and then bring it to court. A judge may hold the other parent in contempt. Unlikely for 1-2 incidents, however.

You probably wouldn't need a lawyer if you have clear documentation/evidence. An order is an order.

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Old 02-17-2016, 10:09 PM
stripes stripes is offline
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The mandate of the police is to protect the public, preserve public safety and keep the peace, so if no one is in danger and public order is not at risk, they won't intervene. Enforcing court orders is not part of their job, unless it overlaps with any of the above. If Mom isn't complying with an order, I think your only option would be working through the courts, possibly a contempt motion? I've heard of people who have "police enforceable" written into their orders, but that doesn't actually obligate the police to intervene if the order is not being followed.
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Old 02-24-2016, 02:42 PM
Ottawasm Ottawasm is offline
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Thanks people.
We were considering contempt of court until we did a lot of research and posted here.. we then realized how crazy difficult it is to prove somone was doing wrong willfully and such.
We are doind research on doing a petition to enforce order first, if possible.
We will definitely add a clause about police enforcement to the next court order since we know it will happen again and again. (Happening again right now).

Thanks for the feedback!
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Old 02-24-2016, 03:55 PM
Links17 Links17 is offline
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good call, contempt is a last resort
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Old 02-24-2016, 05:18 PM
Beachnana Beachnana is offline
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So BM. Means birth Mother. Interesting way to refer to Mom Why the distinction in your post. Is there a SM. Aka Step Mom in the picture?

I only thought you would need to refer to Mom as BM if she was absent. Taken off etc.

Just an observation that referring to Mom as BM is demeaning and not necessary.

Hard to get through a communication and build a workable relationship if you have no respect.

That being said she is stupid not to let you Dad aka BD see your child.
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Old 02-24-2016, 05:48 PM
standing on the sidelines standing on the sidelines is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Beachnana View Post
So BM. Means birth Mother. Interesting way to refer to Mom Why the distinction in your post. Is there a SM. Aka Step Mom in the picture?

I only thought you would need to refer to Mom as BM if she was absent. Taken off etc.

Just an observation that referring to Mom as BM is demeaning and not necessary.

Hard to get through a communication and build a workable relationship if you have no respect.

That being said she is stupid not to let you Dad aka BD see your child.
I think the poster is BDs partner. I could be wrong. I also find using the term BM or BD to be somewhat demeaning. The only reason I did here was due to the fact the OP used it.
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Old 02-24-2016, 05:59 PM
Beachnana Beachnana is offline
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Ok that makes sense. So step back SM and let BD interact with Mom and do the pick ups until things settle down!

Last edited by Beachnana; 02-24-2016 at 06:06 PM. Reason: Left some words out.
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Old 02-24-2016, 08:21 PM
Ottawasm Ottawasm is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Beachnana View Post
Ok that makes sense. So step back SM and let BD interact with Mom and do the pick ups until things settle down!
Wow. Why such a grudge?
BM is not demeaning at all. I am a stepmom, yes. I am civil and I respect that she is the mother and have always done so, and would never do or say anything negative about her in the presence of the child. Does that mean I respect her values and actions? Hell no.
You either missed something in the post or have a grudge against someone and putting in on the wrong people. This forum is meant to be helpful for users.

That being said in the blended family worlds we all refer to BMs, BDs, SMs and SDs and none of these terms are mean or deminishing, they are used to make things easier to write. Also fyi I do not do pickups and such. I support my DH at 100% and seek feedback on his behalf. Court procedures, cops, drama, he deals with her, not me. Never did and never will. I'm there to support and help as all wives should. Please get informed before bashing people on forums. There's no need for hate.
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Old 02-24-2016, 08:42 PM
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blinkandimgone blinkandimgone is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ottawasm View Post

That being said in the blended family worlds we all refer to BMs, BDs, SMs and SDs and none of these terms are mean or deminishing, they are used to make things easier to write. Also fyi I do not do pickups and such. I support my DH at 100% and seek feedback on his behalf. Court procedures, cops, drama, he deals with her, not me. Never did and never will. I'm there to support and help as all wives should. Please get informed before bashing people on forums. There's no need for hate.
There are many, many, many here who are "in the blended family worlds" and very rarely ever do we see here the term 'BM' used. Perhaps get a feel for the climate on a new site before making such sweeping statements.

I have been in both positions, and I can tell you that if someone referred to me as BM or bio mom when referencing my position with my own children, I WOULD be highly offended. I am Mom, Dad is Dad. Period. I am not bio mom/birth mom, I am Mom, The Mom and the only Mom. Same goes for dad. If you are an addition to my child's family as a step, your title will have the 'step' added, and mine will remain the same: Mom, and you will not diminish that for my child in such a disrespectful way by daring to refer to myself or my child's father as 'bio' or 'birth', in front of them or not.

I know many people in blended families who don't and would never use the terms BM and BD. it's not complicated or confusing in any way, it's Mom, Dad and the addition of Step -mom and Step-dad. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure it out, but it does take a respectful Step-parent to understand.
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