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Ex is medicating S11, started without my knowledge

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  • Ex is medicating S11, started without my knowledge

    Ollo,

    Long story short, well i hope. I was recently informed that my ex started medicating my S11 by my D10. This was going on for about a month, both myself and teacher noticed a drastic change in S11, falling asleep at school, in his own bubble etc... I was then 'summoned' by a new pediatritian who wanted to speak to the both of us. First time me and Ex are in same room apart from court. The appointment went horribly; ex spoke over me all the time, made all her usual accusations against me, stated all her opinions as facts. Even thought i provided the doctor with ample medical docs and testimony that S11 is fine, he largely ignored it or didn't address them due to Ex monopoly of the conversation.

    Despite the doctor recommending the medication be stopped and a third party evaluation be done, because we clearly did not agree and had our own reports. I was informed that she will continue and step up the dose (which she asked him how and it's above what is recommended by prescription) and she won't get the evaluation done because it's too much stress and will wait till after the trial. Of course if Im willing to pay for the psychiatrist then she will go.

    I can't fault the pediatritian, he was caught in a high conflict situation and wanted out. My issue is he previously gave my Ex the green light to medicate without my knowledge or consent. He also stated he won't inform me of any appointments for S11 because that is my Ex's responsibility.

    She used a retired pediatrian's letter from 2015 as 'proof' S11 has ADHD, then, a year later did the sleep study (requested in the letter) after OCL reminded her of it. She informed the sleep clinic that S11 has ADHD, so their report was skewed and they prescribed meds. She filled the prescription in 2016 and waited to get this new pediatrician who saw S11 once (his file medical file literally has 2 pages in it) to say "its ok to medicate" and she now ignores the same doctor who recommended to stop meds based on side effects reported and she says no, i will consult the sleep clinic.. so now who knows how long she will medicate before she gets another skewed opinion to continue.

    My medical docs: 2x notes from family doctor (one from when i received the original letter of diagnosis - 2015, the other from when my son asked to speak to someone as he was tired of being told he's sick - 2016). 1x from pediatritian this year that reviewed all her documents (blood work, sleep study, letter etc). Letter from S11 current teacher. Letters from 3rd parties (not friends, ie: one is a nurse) that see S11 regularly at church, school, etc. . All stating his healthy and no issues.

    I am doing my best to teach my son his rights as he will be 12 in a month... (thanks tayken -info from previous post) but he won't say no to mom because the meds don't affect him and she will get mad.

    I agree having two sets of doctors is nonsense and hurtful for children. The family doctor S11 has with me has known him since he was 3. Hers are new, and an hour bus ride away, always changing, and in the town she wants to move to. Legally my S11 is trapped, she has OCL and paperwork to medicate and knows what to say and do. I talked with CAS and they confirmed my best bet is to teach my son and hope he doesn't get too messed up.

    Anyone know what else I can do? We have week about visitation so he is on meds one week and off for the other.

  • #2
    She has medical papers that say medication is acceptable.
    She has shared custody.

    To stop the mom you have to do two things:
    1) Give evidence that she is a lousy parent
    2) Give evidence that the doctor made a mistake

    Offhand, it sounds like you have neither, when you need both. It must be frustrating. If my ex was forcing my kids to take unnecessary medication I would be very upset.

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by Asphenaz View Post
      ... He also stated he won't inform me of any appointments for S11 because that is my Ex's responsibility.
      Joint guardianship - if you have it, means you have the right to get medical info about your son directly from the pediatrician. I would say at minimum he is required to update you on your son's condition & care if you call and ask about it. Them notifying you is a matter of customer service and this ped is proudly upholding a low standard of customer service.

      Were you able to stem the flow of meds?

      Comment

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