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  #1  
Old 04-10-2020, 07:52 PM
Resident sceptic Resident sceptic is offline
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Just curious. Our ex-daughter-in-law has custody with dad having three weekends a month plus half the holidays. The childrenís school has taken the position that the father needs the motherís permission to go to Parent Teacher meetings as one example and the mother wonít give it. Anyone ever had to deal with this?
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Old 04-10-2020, 10:44 PM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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If he has it in his agreement that he is permitted to get info from the school then he can attend without her permission. If the school is being difficult then he needs to call the superintendent.
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Old 04-10-2020, 11:01 PM
Resident sceptic Resident sceptic is offline
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It is the agreement. The Principal has been difficult from the very first day. He did speak to superintendent who closed ranks with the Principal. He had to have his lawyer write just to get reports cards etc but still does not get the pertinent information that is provided the mother. In fact some very important information is trusted to the mother to give to him and of course the mother has hidden it and thatís just what I know about.
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Old 04-14-2020, 12:03 AM
dad2bandm dad2bandm is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Resident sceptic View Post
It is the agreement...

What specifically is in the agreement, regarding this? Specific wording. If only Mom actually has custody, then I doubt the school would allow the other parent to attend parent-teacher interviews without the custodial parent's permission. It would look bad on Mom if she denies, but I don't think the school has a choice in the matter *if* both parents don't actually have custody.



If there is just general wording about how Dad has a right to info about child's schooling, or that "Mom will provide to Dad pertinent school info", well, that's something else.


In any case, Dad should be documenting any requests for info, and denials from the other parent, to such request. They may come in handy down the road.


If Dad does actually have custody as well (ex. joint custody), then that's an entirely different matter.
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Old 04-14-2020, 07:18 AM
Resident sceptic Resident sceptic is offline
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She has custody, dad gets 3 weekends a month, half the holidays, week on, week off during the summer.

The Order reads- 'Both the Applicant and Respondent shall be entitled to a copy of the children's report cards, notice of all school events and activities medical reports...'
Dad sometimes gets report cards but that's it.

The order goes on to say- 'Both the Applicant and Respondent shall be entitled to communicate directly with all professionals involved with the children, including but not limited to Medical, dental, educational...'

The most disturbing part of the education issue, is the older child has been absent from school over 115 times in the past four years (over 95% on mom's time when there was a week on week off temporary order.)

After the final Order in November 2019 the older child had 43 absences from November to June so the incidence of absenteeism had gone up. This year is no better. He is failing grade 6. No one seems concerned or if they are they are not communicating it to dad.

The younger child has been absent about 70 days in the past three years and is failing grade 2. No one seems concerned but if the are they are communicating it to dad.

As I have posted on here before; we have some proof mom rewards the older child with days off school for things like lying to professionals.
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Old 04-15-2020, 10:47 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Resident sceptic View Post
She has custody, dad gets 3 weekends a month, half the holidays, week on, week off during the summer.

The Order reads- 'Both the Applicant and Respondent shall be entitled to a copy of the children's report cards, notice of all school events and activities medical reports...'
Mom has custody. Dad has some specifically enumerated rights:

1) Copy of report cards
2) Notice of school events

"Attending parent teacher meetings" is not one of those explicity defined rights. As the custodial parent, the mother gets to make all decisions unless otherwise set out by the agreement.


Quote:
The order goes on to say- 'Both the Applicant and Respondent shall be entitled to communicate directly with all professionals involved with the children
It sounds like the father is able to call up the school and set up a meeting if he desires.

If the teacher does not want to meet during the parent teacher night, why doesn't he just set up a meeting at a different time?
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Old 04-15-2020, 11:18 AM
Resident sceptic Resident sceptic is offline
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Well he has had conference calls with the teachers after-the-fact, so perhaps I misdescribed the type of meeting.
These were I guess 'meet and greet' where the children get to show the parent their classroom, what they're doing as well as talking to the teacher about how they're doing. On the first occasion, the mother asked the father on our Family Wizard if he would attend to which he said yes. Then when he arrived and the children were excited and all over him, the Principal threw him out; the children crying and clinging to him. The mother then chided him on the Wizard saying he had to have her permission to attend. Then the phone conferences were enacted; so I guess the school did their bit and hey, every time I think i know something I find out I don't. That said I still think the school should have informed the father of other decisions, or left it to the mother to deliver permission forms etc.
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