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  • So many questions.

    First off sorry for the lengeth, I am going to try and short form this, looking for any advice anyone may have.

    CL Relationship (3.5yrs), living together, built our home together last year both names on the mortgage and both pay bills in the house. We share one bank account that he manages, we both make good money, him more them me but we both do well. Our home is worth close to a million and he is wanting to buy me out, I dont feel it's possible as not one person could afford to run the house, also I paid out my my pocket from my dad's money he left me when he passed away last year, for the fridge, stove, window treatments etc..money I would like to get back someone...close to 50K.

    We currently have one child she is 2 and one on the way, I am 7 months expecting. my questions are as followed.

    I would move out right now if I could, however seeing as I am currently 7 months expecting and will be going on off on MAT leave soon I am very tight for cash, I will be going from an income of about 90k a year to less the 22k. I still have my car to pay for, ins, life ins coverage, gas, and now 2 kids, I don't know how I would do it, nor do I know how he could afford to help me if he is trying to pay the mortgage on the house etc. He has always wanted to live out of our means and I am so worried about how this could all unfold. I have worked so hard to get to where I am in life. I have forked every cent I had into helping him get out of debt and deal with massive lawyers bills he had from a DUI charge when we met. I came into the relationship with much more then he did, and helped him alot, he was in alot of debt which I paid off with money I had saved. however he now makes more then me. I am NOT looking to battle this out over money, I just want to walk away with enough to start over, or even to get through the year of Mat leave. He is wants shared custody however I dont think thats in the best interest of our daughter soon to be 2 children, they are just to young and she has already been through so much, we have had a very un healthy relationship as he has a wild temper and she has often seen more then any child should ever see in their life, he is not a bad dad for the most part, we just have our issues that we cant seen to work out, and I dont see any other solution then to end this, before we do major damage to our kids.

    Any advice would be great, I just dont even know where to begin, Lawyers would have a field day with us, and I dont have the strengeth to go through all that right now.

    Thanks..

  • #2
    2young4this,

    Welcome to the forum

    The issues -

    Custody - best interest of the child to prevail if the issue is litigated. Tender years position is no longer valid in Ontario.

    Access - This usually goes hand in hand with custody. Best Interest of the child prevails if the matter is litigated.

    Child Support - Depends on custodial regime and living arrangement of the children.


    Spousal Support - Because your going on maternity - you may just be entitled to spousal support due to the difference and income. At law you have passed the common law threshold for spousal support - being in a relationship of some permanence and have a child together and one on the way.

    Property - the home belongs to both and should be appraised and value apportioned equally.

    Debts - each spouse maintains their own debts.

    Unjust enrichment - maybe - relationship was brief. Onus on the claimant to prove such occurred.


    lv

    Comment


    • #3
      Thanks for answering, Just wanted to make sure I am understanding correct.

      "Tender Years position" what does this mean? and what do they look at when considering "in the best interest" of the kids? I dont want to keep his kids from him, however I do feel they are better off with me right now, they are very young, one not even born!he has very little time for her now, let alone with me gone, I dont want to hand our kids over for him to leave them with his mother so he can work, or whatever..

      I dont want any support from him, no thanks!! I just want to know if I was to walk out of our home together and leave him here to pay the bills as he so wishes until we figure out if we would sell or he would/could buy me out, could this come back to bite me?

      it's turning into a really nasty battle here and I just want to move on, and have something to start over with, I dont know if it's possible though given the mess of the situation.

      Comment

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