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Facing down wage garnishment on a fraudulent FRO claim

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  • #16
    Originally posted by Stubbs View Post
    Judging by the 1:00 AM visit from the Police I just had (who referred specifically to this website) it looks like the one little corner of the world where I can vent my frustrations and talk about my my divorce is being monitored by my ex-wife and her husband.

    Since it's the weekend still, I imagine that on Monday I'll be getting the call from Children's Aid or something like that.

    So congratulations. You've managed to take someone who's already at a low point and made his life worse.

    Thanks to the people here who have helped me along the way with my divorce issues, but obviously I can't post anything here anymore.
    It's up to you to continue in here or not, but you can still read some of the above advice? Your last posts were cause for concern. Putting your things in order? - kids being better off without you? ...

    Whatever you decide to do is your business, though you should be aware how your actions will impact your children. You are obviously depressed and need help getting through this (temporary) mess. Realize that no matter how bad things are now, they will change. Your kids will get older, your financial situation will stabilize and if you do get 'the call' on Monday, work with it.

    Most of us going through the divorce process have hit the wall at some point in time ... it does get better.

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    • #17
      Originally posted by Stubbs View Post
      Judging by the 1:00 AM visit from the Police I just had (who referred specifically to this website) it looks like the one little corner of the world where I can vent my frustrations and talk about my my divorce is being monitored by my ex-wife and her husband.

      Since it's the weekend still, I imagine that on Monday I'll be getting the call from Children's Aid or something like that.

      So congratulations. You've managed to take someone who's already at a low point and made his life worse.

      Thanks to the people here who have helped me along the way with my divorce issues, but obviously I can't post anything here anymore.


      Have you not heard of undue hardship. You or your ex can not live in a mansion while the other lives on the street. Its family law. Its all about the kids and what will it do to them to see that. Go to court , self rep, do not pay the land lord and stay where you are. I know a guy who owed 30 grand. When FRO took him to court and he did not have the money they played lets make a deal.
      There are options. You can do it. Now enough venting and get to work. Paperwork paperwork paperwork, it knocks the hell out of me untill its done and every time I wonder what the hell was so hard about it. And stopping a refraining order is easy, in fact after that FRO does the work to get you in front of a Judge. Now with the garnishing and thats got to be tough, FRO is collecting so they dont care bout court just now. Stay where you are, the hell with the bills and the job. There has got to be a better way. Say ok. ok.

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      • #18
        Well everybody, I'm living on $275 a week now. Not even enough to cover my rent, much less groceries, gasoline and insurances.

        What I find most amazing is that my ex is completely allowed to steal from me and until I get in front of a judge I can't do a damned thing about it.

        The worst thing is that she told me her plan: She's just waiting for me to kill myself. She figures my children will get over my death with her and her husband (who she already tries to force my kids to call "Dad"), and my life insurance will take care of the kids' future.

        So that's the loving Mother of my children.

        Needless to say, the least I can do is go on as spitefully as possible, but here's my question for anyone in the know:

        Do judges ever award damages in these situations? I told my lawyer to ask for legal costs and appropriate damages for loss of livelihood, lost income and a whole host of issues, but knowing the system as well as I do I can't imagine I'll ever recover a penny of her theft.

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        • #19
          Stubbs you need to stop and get out of this victim mode. Firstly: no one is going to award you damages as you contemplate above because that would equate to damages for you making an unenforceable "agreement" to lower support payments when you have an enforceable order that states you must pay a higher amount.

          Shake your head! You intuitively know this already. Stop running up against a wall!

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          • #20
            You are in a situation many men and women find themselves at the end of a marriage.

            You probably have to find a roommate. You will have to pick up part-time work.

            You should probably quit communicating with your ex at this time. If she is lawyered up then you are wasting your energy.

            You have to take in your situation logically and make adjustments. It won't be easy but there will be light at the end of it all.

            Decisions are based on documentation. Nothing more and nothing less.

            You're ex obviously has the ability to get under your skin. If you can't shake this then you need to get some help by way of counselling. If you are using drugs or alcohol you can get assistance with your addictions. Many recovering alcoholics or drug addicts go on to have healthy meaningful lives. There are many people who can assist you.

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            • #21
              Originally posted by Stubbs View Post

              The worst thing is that she told me her plan: She's just waiting for me to kill myself. She figures my children will get over my death with her and her husband (who she already tries to force my kids to call "Dad"), and my life insurance will take care of the kids' future.

              So that's the loving Mother of my children.
              Ok, so this is 'her' plan ... now you have to come up with 'your' plan. Why give her the satisfaction of making you crazy? Who cares what she figures, plans, schemes or tries to do. Many of us in here have HC Ex's who are hellbent on destroying our sanity - Stubbs, do your own thing, be the best parent that you can be and IGNORE whatever nastiness she hurls at you.
              The best revenge is to be happy on your own terms.
              Fake it till you make it - you're children love you

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              • #22
                Once in court I mentioned something about the ability for one to bankrupt another and the commented much to my suprise " they cant take any more than 60%. I havnt read that annywhere but I'm assuming it is in the family law act somewhere for her to say that.

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                • #23
                  The Judge commented "they can't take any more than 60%"

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                  • #24
                    The amount that a maintenance enforcement agency can garnishee differs from province to province.

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                    • #25
                      You can't just let your lawyer or her lawyer "take care of things"; you have to be on top of what the lawyer is doing. You're the paying customer; you're the boss; you tell the lawyer what to do! You should have made sure FRO was immediately updated in 2011; ultimately it is your responsibility and nobody else's. You made your bed and now you're wetting it.

                      So your lifestyle is cramped and you have to sell off some belongs, move to a rooming house, and get a part-time job? Life is up, life is down. Life will go back up again.

                      If all you have to pay in CS is $430 a month for two kids, I wouldn't be crying too much.

                      Originally posted by Janibel View Post
                      The best revenge is to be happy on your own terms.
                      Couldn't have said it better myself!

                      Originally posted by Stubbs View Post
                      The worst thing is that she told me her plan: She's just waiting for me to kill myself. She figures my children will get over my death with her and her husband (who she already tries to force my kids to call "Dad"), and my life insurance will take care of the kids' future.
                      Meh. You're lucky to be rid of a woman like that. lol. Sounds like she's in a good financial position and likely has a good life insurance policy, so why not cash in your policy and use the proceeds to get by? The kids will be fine since they'll have her policy to rely on.

                      Originally posted by Franklin View Post
                      I know a guy who owed 30 grand. When FRO took him to court and he did not have the money they played lets make a deal.
                      If Canada Revenue plays this game (and trust me, when the chips are down they do), every other goverment agency will too.

                      Comment


                      • #26
                        Originally posted by Stubbs View Post
                        Well everybody, I'm living on $275 a week now. Not even enough to cover my rent, much less groceries, gasoline and insurances.

                        What I find most amazing is that my ex is completely allowed to steal from me and until I get in front of a judge I can't do a damned thing about it.

                        The worst thing is that she told me her plan: She's just waiting for me to kill myself. She figures my children will get over my death with her and her husband (who she already tries to force my kids to call "Dad"), and my life insurance will take care of the kids' future.

                        So that's the loving Mother of my children.

                        Needless to say, the least I can do is go on as spitefully as possible, but here's my question for anyone in the know:

                        Do judges ever award damages in these situations? I told my lawyer to ask for legal costs and appropriate damages for loss of livelihood, lost income and a whole host of issues, but knowing the system as well as I do I can't imagine I'll ever recover a penny of her theft.
                        I really don't want to sound insensitive......but,

                        most insurance policies don't pay on suicide. Her plan is flawed.

                        Comment


                        • #27
                          Try sending FRO a Voluntary Arrears Payment Schedule, so they don't take half of your pay cheque.

                          If you go to the FRO website, there is a section that says forms/ commonly used forms. "Voluntary Arrears Schedule" is the last form. Here is the link:

                          Family Responsibility Office: Commonly used forms | Ministry of Community and Social Services

                          I have gone through that myself---had half my pay taken for almost 2 years because ex contacted them, saying I had never ever paid her Child Support.

                          I sent FRO proof of cheques that I had gave ex. They contacted ex at that time (If ex would have signed off that she received that money from me...I would have been reimbursed....but ex ignored FRO's communication to her regarding it----FRO told me at that time, I'd have to deal with it on my own through lawyers/court against ex. They said that they would note ex as being uncooperative, since she refused to respond to them regarding my proof of cheques)

                          Ex and I did settle out of court with lawyers after that.


                          2 years later and ex is trying to pull another FRO scam.
                          Recently, Ex has gone to the court house and filled out a "Statement of Arrears", a court clerk signed off on it and sent this form to FRO.

                          I received letter from FRO stating that I am in arrears...and they will begin taking half my pay.

                          I went in to Court house and spoke with a clerk, showed her my court order/proof that I was not in arrears, and questioned how a clerk could sign off for ex on that.

                          Clerk informed me that ex did not even have to show the clerk the court order or any proof that I hadn't paid.
                          All ex had to do was a sworn affidavit, and the court clerk has to sign off on it/ send to FRO.

                          I get in touch with FRO---Case worker goes over Court Order with me.....agrees that I am NOT in arrears, and they are making a mistake by beginning to take half of my pay.

                          FRO worker is just as shocked as I that ex never had to show any proof of court order/proof of arrears to the clerk.

                          Waiting on FRO worker to get back to me.

                          FRO worker tells me that there is a possibility that they can make it so that they do not accept/follow anything else that ex sends them (as this is ex's second time abusing system to scam me)
                          So I am really praying that it ends up like that and ex can not keep using FRO like this.

                          Comment

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