Roller Coaster of Emotions

[hadenough]

I did the same house separation too. For almost a year, and yes it sucks ass :s Very draining. I would often put off coming home as long as possible. On warm summer days I'd go park by the lake and read or just look out at the water trying to wrap myself in just a few moments of calm. I'd even stop @a Cemetery near my house. It has beautiful manicured gardens and fountains, with benches to sit on. Sounds a little strange I guess, but it was so peaceful and quiet. There were usually a few other people there, tending to the flowers around a loved one's grave. And then there was me, just wanting a brief time of peace and quiet and to feel the sun on my face. Then I'd get into my car, drive the few minutes home with a sinking feeling that increased the closer I got to the house.

Find your moments and your places that give you peace. Yoga is supposed to be amazing although I've never tried it. I have gone to the gym religiously throughout all of this and I've found it to be a huge help in so many ways. I realized as well that it seemed like one of the few things I could control. Meaning the way I looked. But it also helped how I felt. I still have days where I feel I've been beaten with a large stick, but I know I'd feel a lot worse if I was not exercising. Reading is good too. I find it can "take me away" for a little while. Good Luck. You will find freedom. It's inside you. True freedom will come from within.

[Karver]

Thanks All. I try and stay away when he's around, I do have some hobbies.
Luckily stbx works alot, although he's really become a much more involved dad since the split. It seems like seperation is working well for him. He's even giving me the time of day now. Ahhh, life is funny.
I've been feeling better the past few days. I'm sure that will come and go. BUT I am feeling happier being seperate from this person, eventhough under same roof. It only really sucks now when I see his car pull up. Anxiety or what!! But I guess it's always been that way.
I'm getting a taste of peace at times now and I do like it! I've still got a long way to go in this yet....

[cbarker78]

((hugs)) and best wishes!!

What saw me through those trying times, was just allowing myself to feel sad, or angry, or whatever the emotion of the day was. I no longer tried to bury it or deny it.... once I poured it out (in a constructive manner) I could take a deep breath and move on....

Good friends, close family, wine, and yoga were all things I used to help find a bit of peace....

It absolutely sucks going through it, and it will feel like a roller coaster for some time...... but hold on to the little glimmer of hope that when you feel down and out, the coaster will go back up!! Slowly, but it will get there......

((hugs))