Ottawa Divorce .com Forums


User CP

New posts

Advertising

  Ottawa Divorce .com Forums > Main Category > Financial Issues

Financial Issues This forum is for discussing any of the financial issues involved in your divorce.

Reply
 
Thread Tools
  #11  
Old 09-19-2018, 10:53 AM
Janus's Avatar
Janus Janus is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 1,678
Janus will become famous soon enough
Default

Point 1: BIFF

I read that acronym on this forum soon after I joined, and it has guided me in all my communications with my very hostile ex.

Brief
Informative
Factual
Friendly

Your husband is dropping the ball on pretty much every aspect of that. If he feels like making legal arguments, save those for court. Telling her his arguments in advance just helps her prepare her counterarguments and does nothing to help him.

Point 2: Demands

Anybody can demand anything. Your ex could demand that CS payments double, or that they be made in a lump sum at the beginning of the year, or that they be made biweekly, or whatever.

The courts, on the other hand, are the only ones who have the power to compel. Some people make the mistake of thinking that they are compelled by their ex's demands.

The ex has made a demand. Your husband has no obligation to follow that demand.

Point 3: What I would do

I have overpaid you by $800. I am offering three options for repayment:
A) I take $800 off the next CS payment
B) I take $200 off the next four CS payments
C) You send me a cheque for $800 by September 30th.

If you do not accept any of these options in writing by September 30th, 2018, then I will go with option B. If you wish to dispute this matter in court, please let me know and feel free to serve my lawyer at the following address:


...then I would ignore any response unless it says "I agree with option X". Unless she provides a reasonable option D, but I would not count on that. Until she actually serves you, then her threats are just bluster and have all the might of an anemic lemming.
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 09-19-2018, 11:17 AM
good_mom good_mom is online now
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Ottawa
Posts: 440
good_mom is on a distinguished road
Default

Thank you Janus.

He owes her nothing. All CS has been paid after the amount she owed was subtracted what she owned him and what he had already paid out for July and August he transferred the last amount that was left too.
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old 09-19-2018, 11:20 AM
Janus's Avatar
Janus Janus is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 1,678
Janus will become famous soon enough
Default

Oh, so if everything is as it should be, what is the problem?

He owes X, he has paid X. There is no issue here.
Reply With Quote
  #14  
Old 09-19-2018, 11:30 AM
good_mom good_mom is online now
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Ottawa
Posts: 440
good_mom is on a distinguished road
Default

Thank you Janus.

He owes her nothing. All CS has been paid after the amount she owed was subtracted and what he had already paid out for July and August he transferred the last amount that was left too.

CS went from 234 every 2 weeks to 76 every 2 weeks and because of that she wants him to continue to pay. He was off sick for 95% of 2017.

She only works part-time and still expect him to pay when he was sick, this is nto the first time he has been off due to medical, he has an on going medical condition. They were together the last time he was off. This time he was off due to same condition and another...as Arabian says. Can't suck and blow at the same time.
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Old 09-21-2018, 01:29 PM
good_mom good_mom is online now
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Ottawa
Posts: 440
good_mom is on a distinguished road
Default

Here is the draft of what he wrote to send her.

Attached you will find our separation agreement with all the details of what we agreed upon. This separation agreement was completed with our own independent legal advice and is a valid and applicable agreement.

For all section 7 items such as camps, activities and clothing items, do see the separation agreement for the details of what we agreed upon.

We agreed to update child support once a year which has been completed and paid.

Is this following BIFF?

Should he add this?

If you wish to dispute this matter in court, please let me know and feel free to serve my lawyer at the following address:

There is a clause that they must mediate first at shared cost...

Last edited by good_mom; 09-21-2018 at 01:34 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #16  
Old 09-21-2018, 03:31 PM
rockscan rockscan is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 3,701
rockscan will become famous soon enough
Default

Why is he even going that far?

Child support works out to $x. I paid the amount I owed and you can either pay me $x immediately or I will begin subtracting it from the monthly child support.

Shes not going to agree and going to court over $800 is a waste of time.

Adversely he can simply subtract whatever from next years reconciliation or from future expenses.
Reply With Quote
  #17  
Old 09-21-2018, 04:17 PM
standing on the sidelines standing on the sidelines is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Kitchener Ontario
Posts: 5,373
standing on the sidelines is on a distinguished road
Default

if he owed the money (instead of over payment) would he pay it all in one shot? Just putting that out there.
Reply With Quote
  #18  
Old 09-21-2018, 05:04 PM
good_mom good_mom is online now
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Ottawa
Posts: 440
good_mom is on a distinguished road
Default

Dad was affected by Phoenix pay system for over a year were some months he was not paid at all. He always paid CS and has not missed once. Yes, I believe he would always better to get things paid then let them drag on is how we role.

We are a blended family with 3 kids, both working full time both paying CS and with no extended family to support with kids but we make it work.

He has been paying off-set with mom who has no intention of working full time. She had 6 years of off-set on part-time…employment.

Hard to feel for her owing $800 or that CS has gone down due to his illness when in fact he has paid over 14k extra because she did not work full time. Yes…he should have had income inputted to her….that will be argued if this ends up in court.
Reply With Quote
  #19  
Old 09-21-2018, 06:01 PM
kate331 kate331 is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2017
Posts: 486
kate331 is on a distinguished road
Default

Are you in Ontario? Why not go through FRO?
Reply With Quote
  #20  
Old 09-22-2018, 03:41 PM
Janus's Avatar
Janus Janus is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 1,678
Janus will become famous soon enough
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by good_mom View Post
Attached you will find our separation agreement with all the details of what we agreed upon. This separation agreement was completed with our own independent legal advice and is a valid and applicable agreement.
That is not factual, that is an opinion. An irrelevant opinion to boot. Why is he making legal arguments to his ex? What does independent legal advice have to do with anything outside of a courtroom?

That entire paragraph should be deleted. She has the agreement, it is a reasonable assumption that both parties will follow the agreement. Saying that it is a valid agreement is an opinion, and even worse almost implies the possibility that it might not be valid.

Quote:
For all section 7 items such as camps, activities and clothing items, do see the separation agreement for the details of what we agreed upon.
Quote the actual separation agreement. Say what you want. Don't leave the interpretation up to the other person

Quote:
We agreed to update child support once a year which has been completed and paid.
Why is this even necessary to say? You have paid child support. That matter is finished. Feel free to ignore it.

Quote:
There is a clause that they must mediate first at shared cost...
I hate that clause. Would your partner mediate in good faith?

A) Yes -> If you wish to attempt mediation, here are the name of three mediators. Please pick one and we will set a mutually acceptable date.


B) No -> Our agreement requires mediation, but I feel it would be unproductive and expensive. I recommend that we go to court. However, if you wish to mediate first, then here is the name of three mediators... etc. etc.
Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Child Support and Spousal Support BobbyShaftoe Introductions 14 04-26-2012 02:52 AM
Notional Grossed Up Child Support Amount? Gary M Financial Issues 12 01-06-2011 06:23 PM
When child support ends... paris Financial Issues 3 04-23-2010 11:04 PM
Offer to Settle Child Support - Is This Fair? #1StepMom Divorce & Family Law 4 10-27-2009 08:50 AM
Will I be Paying Spousal Support? North of You Financial Issues 5 10-21-2009 04:05 AM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 11:53 AM.