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  Ottawa Divorce .com Forums > Main Category > Parenting Issues

Parenting Issues This forum is for discussing any of the parenting issues involved in your divorce, including parenting of step-children.

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  #21  
Old 12-14-2017, 01:04 PM
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Tayken Tayken is offline
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Originally Posted by Beachnana View Post
Janus there is a lot of truth in what you say. Both parties are so intent in their hate for each other they are both unable to deal civil on any occasion.
Then tell the party you have access to give up the days and stop the nonsense.
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  #22  
Old 12-14-2017, 01:17 PM
Beachnana Beachnana is offline
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Tayken believe me we have made that suggestion. But the damage was done with the first Nasty demanding email the ex sent at start of the conversation.
His email started with a threat and then went on about
Money And then his demand to change what has been the usual arrangement over the past 3 Christmas the child has been in school. So not a good start to the conversation. So when I suggested a compromise I was told no compromise with the ex shows weakness and he will only take advantage of that.

The conversation I wish I could have
Had was with the ex to show him how to write a nice starting email conversation which would ha e brought him to a better conclusion. But he is a nasty bully who starts all conversations with “my”.
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  #23  
Old 12-15-2017, 10:01 AM
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Tayken Tayken is offline
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Originally Posted by Beachnana View Post
Tayken believe me we have made that suggestion.
Conflict is like an addition. Some times you have to take an extreme position with those involved. You can simply tell your daughter that you will no longer support her (financially, emotionally, etc...) if she continues down this dangerous path. Ultimately, the child will be impacted.

I think you are doing absolutely the wrong thing by not putting a hard line in the sand to end this conflict between the parents of the child.

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Originally Posted by Beachnana View Post
But the damage was done with the first Nasty demanding email the ex sent at start of the conversation.
But, its a few hours here or there. In the grand scheme it is not worth the fight? You can't blow hot and cold on the subject saying you made a suggestion then say its the dad's fault. Its ultimatly BOTH of their fault.

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Originally Posted by Beachnana View Post
His email started with a threat and then went on about
A threat? Then call the police. A threat is well defined. But, if he told you that he will exersize his RIGHT to take the matter to court. He was being polite actually. He could have served papers instead of informing you of the alternative to resolve the dispute. An alternative that EVERY CANADIAN has!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stop with the "thread" and other nonsense.

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Originally Posted by Beachnana View Post
Money And then his demand to change what has been the usual arrangement over the past 3 Christmas the child has been in school.
Change happens. Deal with it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Beachnana View Post
So not a good start to the conversation. So when I suggested a compromise I was told no compromise with the ex shows weakness and he will only take advantage of that.
That is what I would call "conflict addiction" on the part of both parties.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Beachnana View Post
The conversation I wish I could have
Had was with the ex to show him how to write a nice starting email conversation which would ha e brought him to a better conclusion. But he is a nasty bully who starts all conversations with “my”.
Who cares what he does. You have to worry about your daughter whom (a) does not participate on this site and (b) seems to rely upon you to be the adult in her parent-child relationship.

Sorry to say... Your daughter has a heap of personal issues if she relies on her mom as an adult to support her like this.

Yes... I am being a bit terse but, you have been here too long dealing with such petty matters that should have resolved by now. Its not your fault your daughter is caught up in a grade 8 fight with the other parent. But, you have all the power in the world to disconnect yourself from it and make her be an adult.

Good Luck!
Tayken
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  #24  
Old 12-15-2017, 10:22 AM
Beachnana Beachnana is offline
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Thank you. Good advice which I have decided to take
I bid you all farewell and good Luck to you all.

This site has given me lots of support, some harsh reality and some useful information.
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  #25  
Old 12-15-2017, 10:29 AM
kate331 kate331 is offline
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Please stick around for us Newbies. I have learnt a lot from your post on what to do and what not to do, regardless if your a parent. Also thanks for helping me via PM too.
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