Looking for some direction.
I have been living common law in Ontario for the past 12 years. I moved into my partner’s home that she salvaged from her divorce. As she was cash strapped by then I thought it was “fair” to buy out the share that she had to pay her former spouse ($25,000).
We shared all costs equally (have similar paying jobs) including the mortgage. After a year we decided to finish the lower level to gain more space. I hired a contractor and spent $40,000 on the job. She did not contribute to this cost and I was not concerned as we will after all planning live happily ever after! While the work was being completed she suggested that we have the title of the home held jointly. I visited a lawyer and he pointed out the costs involved with the land transfer tax etc. He listed the options as: pay these costs now and add you name; wait three years and we’d be considered common-law spouses or if we were to marry then the point is moot.
I decided to wait and a year later we became engaged. I did not think of the title much after that.
So early this year she informed me that our relationship was over and that she was listing the house. This was a huge surprise as although we were not “perfectly” happy, I would never have imagined that this would be the result.
I moved into the lower level and we continued to share all costs. Despite many, many attempts I could not get her to engage in a discussion on either the relationship or when it became painfully evident that this was, ”over” on a settlement on the property. She would often agree to discuss it later but she simply would not. When I pressed her for information she would reply that I had to cooperate to continue living here, the house was hers and subtle hints that I was stressing her with these questions. She listed the house on her own (I came home from work one evening to find a for sale sign on the front) and we slowly began the path of packing, storing and prepping the house for sale. All through this time I was certain, that knowing her these years that she would share a reasonable amount of the equity ( the house was listed for $350,000 and there was approx. $180,000 on the mortgage).
After two months I was informed that my presence was causing her stress and that I needed to find my own place. After three months she insisted that I find my own place. By then living there was, as others have posted intolerable and I informed her that I could not afford rent and support the home. She agreed and said that she would get through the remaining months until it sold. That was the longest discussion that he had in months. When the question of the property came up she informed me that there would not be a lot as she had paid off some debt by adding it to the mortgage. I figured that she had added $10-$15,000 (maybe) but she hinted that the mortgage value was more like $250,000. I could and do not believe this. I asked to see a copy of the mortgage (remember it`s in her name) and she refused. Anyway, this went on for a few weeks and I finally made the leap to a place of my own but insisted that we needed to settle the equity…that was always greeted with silence. By the time that I was ready to move out she told me that I would not get anything from the sale as it is her home and my contributions were for rent and anything that I had invested was in equal measure to her own.
We have now been living apart for weeks and any attempts to get information on the sale or discussion on the equity go unanswered. I sent her a summary of all my expenses while living there which easily amount to over $70,000 into the capital and over $100,000 in my share of the mortgage payments. This did not interest her, she says I was simply renting. Although our CRA returns list us both as common-law, she is steadfast in offering nothing which then swings to there will be nothing to share after the realty and legal costs, the lowered price and the debt on the mortgage. While she admits that I have made these and other contributions, knows that the home value has increased since the reno and knows that she alone dumped all this who knows what debt onto the mortgage, she is comfortable and confident that she has the law on her side.
The last e-mail exchange stated that this was beginning to feel like she was being harassed. This was likely due to my letter that requested a meeting to review the documents so that I could try to come ot a reasonable division. As I suspected that she would not agree I said that she had a week to reply or that I would be forced to discuss this with a lawyer and if it came to that then I would seek 50% which is less (by my calculations) that what I have added to this sale. To date I have only heard that I am stressing her and she feels….harassed.
I know that I have a case with all the documentation to show my contributions, including the letters from the realty lawyer 11 years ago to show “unjust enrichment”
The clock is ticking as I suspect that she has sold the place and will move into a new home; applying the equity to her down payment thinking that once it is locked up, then it is untouchable.
So, I am in need of some solid advice on how to move this to a reasonable end. I did not add debt to the mortgage and I also do not believe that I would receive the $70,000 plus, but I am more than surprised to be told that I should expect nothing! Without information on the mortgage balance or the sale amount I cannot make a fair calculation.
Any ideas on how to proceed to resolve this between us (similar published cases) or do I consult a lawyer and risk losing a fair chunk of any possible settlement
I have been living common law in Ontario for the past 12 years. I moved into my partner’s home that she salvaged from her divorce. As she was cash strapped by then I thought it was “fair” to buy out the share that she had to pay her former spouse ($25,000).
We shared all costs equally (have similar paying jobs) including the mortgage. After a year we decided to finish the lower level to gain more space. I hired a contractor and spent $40,000 on the job. She did not contribute to this cost and I was not concerned as we will after all planning live happily ever after! While the work was being completed she suggested that we have the title of the home held jointly. I visited a lawyer and he pointed out the costs involved with the land transfer tax etc. He listed the options as: pay these costs now and add you name; wait three years and we’d be considered common-law spouses or if we were to marry then the point is moot.
I decided to wait and a year later we became engaged. I did not think of the title much after that.
So early this year she informed me that our relationship was over and that she was listing the house. This was a huge surprise as although we were not “perfectly” happy, I would never have imagined that this would be the result.
I moved into the lower level and we continued to share all costs. Despite many, many attempts I could not get her to engage in a discussion on either the relationship or when it became painfully evident that this was, ”over” on a settlement on the property. She would often agree to discuss it later but she simply would not. When I pressed her for information she would reply that I had to cooperate to continue living here, the house was hers and subtle hints that I was stressing her with these questions. She listed the house on her own (I came home from work one evening to find a for sale sign on the front) and we slowly began the path of packing, storing and prepping the house for sale. All through this time I was certain, that knowing her these years that she would share a reasonable amount of the equity ( the house was listed for $350,000 and there was approx. $180,000 on the mortgage).
After two months I was informed that my presence was causing her stress and that I needed to find my own place. After three months she insisted that I find my own place. By then living there was, as others have posted intolerable and I informed her that I could not afford rent and support the home. She agreed and said that she would get through the remaining months until it sold. That was the longest discussion that he had in months. When the question of the property came up she informed me that there would not be a lot as she had paid off some debt by adding it to the mortgage. I figured that she had added $10-$15,000 (maybe) but she hinted that the mortgage value was more like $250,000. I could and do not believe this. I asked to see a copy of the mortgage (remember it`s in her name) and she refused. Anyway, this went on for a few weeks and I finally made the leap to a place of my own but insisted that we needed to settle the equity…that was always greeted with silence. By the time that I was ready to move out she told me that I would not get anything from the sale as it is her home and my contributions were for rent and anything that I had invested was in equal measure to her own.
We have now been living apart for weeks and any attempts to get information on the sale or discussion on the equity go unanswered. I sent her a summary of all my expenses while living there which easily amount to over $70,000 into the capital and over $100,000 in my share of the mortgage payments. This did not interest her, she says I was simply renting. Although our CRA returns list us both as common-law, she is steadfast in offering nothing which then swings to there will be nothing to share after the realty and legal costs, the lowered price and the debt on the mortgage. While she admits that I have made these and other contributions, knows that the home value has increased since the reno and knows that she alone dumped all this who knows what debt onto the mortgage, she is comfortable and confident that she has the law on her side.
The last e-mail exchange stated that this was beginning to feel like she was being harassed. This was likely due to my letter that requested a meeting to review the documents so that I could try to come ot a reasonable division. As I suspected that she would not agree I said that she had a week to reply or that I would be forced to discuss this with a lawyer and if it came to that then I would seek 50% which is less (by my calculations) that what I have added to this sale. To date I have only heard that I am stressing her and she feels….harassed.
I know that I have a case with all the documentation to show my contributions, including the letters from the realty lawyer 11 years ago to show “unjust enrichment”
The clock is ticking as I suspect that she has sold the place and will move into a new home; applying the equity to her down payment thinking that once it is locked up, then it is untouchable.
So, I am in need of some solid advice on how to move this to a reasonable end. I did not add debt to the mortgage and I also do not believe that I would receive the $70,000 plus, but I am more than surprised to be told that I should expect nothing! Without information on the mortgage balance or the sale amount I cannot make a fair calculation.
Any ideas on how to proceed to resolve this between us (similar published cases) or do I consult a lawyer and risk losing a fair chunk of any possible settlement
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