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Old 01-16-2009, 11:49 PM
Jane007 Jane007 is offline
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Default Help! My ex got a desk divorce, doesn't pay child support, I appealed - will it be OK

My husband sent papers to me in the States where our house was destroyed so the kids and I were homeless. I never got the papers. He sent them to my email but my kids had taken over the email and closed it. I had a new one. So I never saw the papers until it was too late to reply.
He tried first to get just 'a divorce'. But we have kids. Then he changed lawyer, and she got him to apply for 'a divorce' and 'child support'. I contacted his lawyer and asked for mediation, as it was too late to answer the papers. She said mediation would take place. But... then she didn't arrange it. I asked twice when mediation could begin. I didn't know anything was happening - then I found out that the divorce had been approved by a judge without me even knowing there was a hearing.
So he sneaked through a divorce. The child support order was necessary - without that, no judge would approve it. But he faked his documents about paying child support. He wasn't paying any. But he showed bank statements to the court saying he was. He didn't provide proof of income; no tax returns, nothing.
I still can't believe the judge approved it.
I live in America and the child support is much lower in Canada than it would be here. By $1500 lower. (This man earns a lot of money). He hasn't paid child support even since he got the divorce.
He wants nothing to do with his kids. Didn't ask for custody, nor visitation. Nothing about that in the divorce.
Also nothing about spousal support or our house (which got destroyed, strangely, just before he started the divorce). Nothing about pension.
He won't communicate, won't see the kids...

I have appealed. I want to get the child support modified and back dated 3 years to the date of separation - he left 3 years ago and left us in the States with no money... I want to address all the other issues properly.

Trouble is, I need to do this in the States. I've got no money.

Will they approve this appeal so I can get it all moved to the States, and have a chance to divorce properly, to address all the issues, to be included in it?

how can this ex parte divorce be in the interests of the kids?

We were married for 20 years....it's so crazy. The kids are so very hurt by him leaving...of course, it was for another woman. But that doesn't matter now...I don't know how to support the kids - I had not worked for 20 years...

What will happen in the appeal? Do I have any hope at all?