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Old 10-30-2019, 12:55 PM
gettingexpensive gettingexpensive is offline
Join Date: Mar 2019
Posts: 64
gettingexpensive is on a distinguished road

I'll chime in briefly on this one. I haven't read the full back story / your post history (but might) but..

If this is true "I am not shrink, and have no education in the matter, and Tayken will likely give me the gears for doing this, but the ex (to me) is a typical narcissist. Nothing they do is wrong, nothing you do is right.", and she is indeed somewhat of a narcissist (or cluster B personality disorder), this will be difficult for your daughter at her mom's place and she is now waking up to this. She can now see through the bullshit / smear campaign that her mom has been doing. She now slowly realizes that what she thought was "normal life at home" is not. And I'd venture to say that now that the ex cannot control you, she needs to control someone else.

Make sure your daughter doesn't mention any of this to her mom at this point because this could turn out explosive to say the least.. if there is indeed some personality disorder in there your daughter could move from being "the golden child" to "the bad child". She'll become her mom's scapegoat. She'll also be pissed of possibly losing out on child support.

As for living arrangements, I'd say look into it a bit more. Your ex will likely blame you for doing parental alienation even if it's not the case so you may have to go with OCL so your daughter's voice is heard. In the meantime, maybe try to maximize contacts and offer more visits? It would be a big move for her but may be something to consider at the end of the school year?

If there truly is a personality disorder involved, it's likely not sane for your daughter to stay there. She could end up reproducing this behavior down the road.

(background info: Wife has borderline personality disorder, kids and I are realizing how messed up this all is and the impact on their lives. they are 11 and 15..)
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