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Old 04-19-2011, 01:54 AM
ddol1 ddol1 is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Kingston, ON
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I end this post with this first line - read through it and it may make sense and it may not - it is, i admit, although not technical, a very different way of looking at your issue. But I am sure in the end what you want (and anybody faced with paying CS) is your CS money to go where it belongs - to help YOUR child.

I really believe that the technical version of what is a child has been presented extremely well but the real issue, I believe, is not the definition at hand but what is your CS being used for - which is something my very good friend fell victim to. My friend paid his support and for his efforts was denied his right to visitatation and the rest although he did have a court ordered access (the typical ex who has become a pro at twisting the rules and the system - always staying just one step of the courts) - to the point of this post, he discovered that the support he was paying was not going to "benifit" the child but instead was redirected to the purchase of a fine and fancy new car. His plee to the court was just that and for the readers here, he won.

The court decided to have his ex return to him the CS he had given her on the basis that indeed she did not use it for the direct benifit of the child and the next step was the kicker. Although she had full custody, and the petition did not adress this point, the court decided that in the best interest of the child the custody was changed to 50/50 split and that CS cease as both parents had the capacity to care for the child.

This seams off the mark in your case except for the fact of - how did my friend prove to the court that the funds were not being used in the intent that the laws dictating CS demanded. My friend had fallen ill and as a result fell behind in CS and he ended up paying her all arears at once when he recieved a fairly large sum of money. The next day she went out and bought a new car - cash. The good part of this particular story was my friend put those $24000 dollars, back then, in his child's educational trust fund and 20 years later (four years ago) had funds to put her through University.

So how may you change how you are thinking (great english!) and instead of trying to prove or change what I think you will have a very hard time doing and try thinking on what is your ex actually doing with the CS you are sending? Perhaps there may be a similar pattern in that your ex is not sending the CS to your ex-in-laws? In the end, what you are trying to do is make sure the money you are sending is used for your child's benifit. Perhaps there may be an angle that can be used based on your child's current official address - and could your ex's bank record's be suppenaed (spelling?) to the court which would have to show record of transfers of funds in kind, i.e. matching your CS payments to the adults to which have the "possession" of your child at the current time.

The last thought I do have (if my memory serves me) is the reason your child is liviing where she is now is to remain in her current school until graduation - and that IS in the best interest of the child.