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who gets Christmas for travel?

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  • who gets Christmas for travel?

    Little bit of a gong show again.

    Order is zip on holidays, no provisions for travel. last year I filed motion for travel and won and had child over new years.

    This year, other parent screwed around my access and reduced it, I filed motion to bring it back and increase it a little, and won that. I also filed motion for travel, and to have child for Christmas.

    Judge is a little antsy I did not ask mom prior. But we did send letter through counsel with travel dates and itenary, 2 months in advance. Mom wants child on Christmas, and has dictated Christmas for last few years and cancelled visits that fell on Christmas.

    Judge wants me to change travel dates to what mom is dictating. but is stuck in the middle after some arguments my lawyer made about how christmas weeks alternate each year, etc.

    What is your stances on Christmas ? particulary when you are a different religion but still celeberate it with your kids ? Other parent is also different religion.

    Should you change your travel dates or argue for Christmas ? lawyer believes judge will just allow it but put privions on how travel be handeled in future.

    thoughts ?

  • #2
    Christmas is such an emotional time. It’s also a 2 week school holiday so just split 50/50, alternating each year. So this year December 23- 30 for one parent and Dec 31-Jan 7 for the othermparent. Next year switch it around. Each parent gets a few week to Travel.

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    • #3
      Originally posted by trinton View Post
      Little bit of a gong show again.
      Warning:

      Some judges like it when kids see both parents on Christmas day. One parent from Christmas Eve to noon Christmas day... Then noon to noon boxing day with the other. Also, a lot of private assessors and OCL folks like this too.

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      • #4
        Originally posted by Tayken View Post
        Warning:

        Some judges like it when kids see both parents on Christmas day. One parent from Christmas Eve to noon Christmas day... Then noon to noon boxing day with the other. Also, a lot of private assessors and OCL folks like this too.
        This is what I have. 2pm Christmas Eve until 2pm Christmas Day. Then the other parent gets the kid from 2pm Christmas Day until 4pm on Boxing Day. It rotates each year. That way each parent gets to share in the day.

        In this case, not sure how it will go. You've been successful in other motions, but given judge has "suggested" the change, I may see if I could find some middle ground as judges rarely ever "suggest" things. Generally it what they are leaning on intending on implementing.

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        • #5
          When I was a child I remember sitting in a car for hours on Christmas Eve and then again on Christmas Day travelling from my dads parents to my Moms parents so we could have equal time with each family.

          This is what many families endure each holiday season to say nothing of countless hours at meals.

          One year my Dad said “ no more splitting the Christmas holidays”. From then on I remember happy days of waking up to toys and having long afternoons to play with my new treasures. After Christmas we visited family and friends. Exchanged presents and ate lots of food.

          So in the interests of the child I think Christmas should alternate. Odd years. Christmas eve to Boxing Day with parent A and even years with parent B. If it’s not your year then Start some new traditions with special celebrations, presents, food, family and friends.

          Just because the stores turn off the Christmas Spirit on Boxing Day it does not mean you have to.

          Most school age children are off on,vacation for 2weeks so just split it and enjoy your time.

          I know I will always be thankful for my Dad saying no to travelling back and forth over the holidays.

          This year my Grandson will go to his Dads for the first week. He will have fun and time to enjoy the. Is it. Then He will return home and we will,have our celebration. No less a celebration because 25 th. Still our family and friends coming together to celebrate a special time of year regardless of religion and beliefs.

          The Christmas music will still be playing in Our house right up to News Years day.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by HammerDad View Post
            This is what I have. 2pm Christmas Eve until 2pm Christmas Day. Then the other parent gets the kid from 2pm Christmas Day until 4pm on Boxing Day. It rotates each year. That way each parent gets to share in the day.

            In this case, not sure how it will go. You've been successful in other motions, but given judge has "suggested" the change, I may see if I could find some middle ground as judges rarely ever "suggest" things. Generally it what they are leaning on intending on implementing.
            Well, judge just wanted us to agree on something middle ground on consent. her initial suggestion was I should get new years as I accidentally said I was off on new years. This is where we said no, and my lawyer pointed out mom had Christmas last year, and these years should be alternated. Judge agreed. Just judge couldn't order me to have Christmas during the "talks" as mom would obviously not consent. Judge tried very hard to get me to agree to give mom Christmas. Though again, my lawyer pointed out how mom has been taking Christmas every year and has cancelled my visitations that fall on Christmas.

            Also judge was not aware mom wants Christmas day AND Christmas eve , and new years eve and day every year - I would never be able to have one full week.

            Lawyer thinks judge is just going to let me go, but put something in place for next year as judge irritated by me bringing a motion for Christmas every year (given mom will not agree to a week except for until a motion is filed).

            Lawyer also mentioned judges can't appear to be completely bias so they will say stuff to make it seem like they are not biased.

            Plus side is that I will more than likely have the OCL disclosure by the motion date. If it recommends Christmas be alternated starting this year, then bob is my uncle. or I suppose I could agree to give up christmas this year if I can have it guaranteed for next year - and alternated each year after that.
            Last edited by trinton; 10-26-2017, 05:09 PM.

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            • #7
              Originally posted by Beachnana View Post
              This year my Grandson will go to his Dads for the first week. He will have fun and time to enjoy the. Is it. Then He will return home and we will,have our celebration. No less a celebration because 25 th. Still our family and friends coming together to celebrate a special time of year regardless of religion and beliefs.

              The Christmas music will still be playing in Our house right up to News Years day.
              Hold old is your grandson? How do you manage the Santa coming to each house, or does Santa alternate too

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              • #8
                Originally posted by kate331 View Post
                Hold old is your grandson? How do you manage the Santa coming to each house, or does Santa alternate too
                Santa visits everyones home.

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                • #9
                  He is going to be 6 this year. Santa often needs to come any time during December. Always has done.

                  We have always pushed “ seasonal time of year”. “ the magical time of year”. Not focusing on “ one day”. In this day and age where so many work shift work away from home it is necessary to shift the focus from one day to the season of good will.

                  Time to think outside the box and create a magical time of year!

                  Comment

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