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Old 06-29-2021, 04:06 PM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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Originally Posted by Clarityseeker View Post
A question for clarification on the RESP. There are two portions to the RESP - the principle portion which she paid into and then the EAP portion - which is the Government grant - not her money. In our case, the EAP portion was directly payable to my Partner's son - as he was the registered beneficiary and it was only payable based on his school registration for his use towards his education, otherwise it wouldn't be payable at all. There was even a T3 issued in the child's name. My Partner's Ex got all of her RESP principle back to do with what she pleases.
Heres the deal with RESPs, yes they are for the child but if she decided to take all her money back, the government grant would have to be paid back to the gov. A better what to do this is to have the government grant applied to the full cost with the OSAP grant and then give her the rest of the RESP. Truly she paid into it so its her money to apply to the cost and a judge will see it that way too. Not a hill to die on. If the calculation comes back, simply have the grant come off the top and then give her the benefit of the rest.

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Regarding the travel - thank you for the suggestion. He can thank her for eliminating the child's costs by including him in her drive to work (using a softer approach) and then offer a reasonable amount per week for gas. I guess we will see how that goes and then if she wants to fight it then we can bring it before a judge with our argument and hope for some reasonableness to be applied.
He could also calculate the km between her work and the school and calculate the cost there. Split it proportionate to income and tell her he will pay x dollars towards gas which is the difference between the school and her work. And dont fight her on it. Simply say this is what I am offering and let her do something about it.

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Regarding the OSAP docs and school costs for 1st year for the son living with us - I agree they are not a secret - the problem is is that if we provide them, she will dig it all up and cherry pick the items that she thinks benefit her and try to apply them to the current bill (yes - all 3 proportions owing on it have been set out). It is honestly not worth the aggrevation. We tried to get them to discuss school costs with us a year ago and by the time it was even acknowledged by them, his first year was done and they immediately closed the books on it within the Order.
So send it to her with a reminder about the order. As in As per the previously agreed to order, first year costs have been set out and are not open for negotiation. As such, I am sending these without prejudice for information purposes only. And leave it at that. She can cherry pick all she wants. Your partner doesnt have to play along. What is she going to do? Send a strongly worded email saying he owes her? Wooo scary.

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We have learned that her lawyer avoids clarification of anything because it allows her make the rules in her favour as she goes along and she is a tyrant. So we want to insist on an Amended Order first, before we cough anything up.
No her lawyer takes their orders from her. If she tells them to be an idiot, they will be an idiot. Just send the damn forms. I repeat, send the disclosure. You would have to do it for court anyway and that costs money. Sending it to her now is free. Then you ignore her bullshit.

Youre overthinking it. Send the documents and be done with it. You want payment for kids expenses that are eligible. If she says anything about the previous agreement you tell her you consider those expenses dealt with and irrelevant and then IGNORE HER.
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