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  • ODF beats ILA

    These thoughts really didn't belong in the thread that provoked them, so I am starting a new one.

    Originally posted by Wyntermcd View Post
    Not upset so much that he pays, he signed the agreement after we had gotten together so I knew about it, (it took them a few years after they separated to get one written up), mostly just wishing that at the time I had known what I know now. There are a bunch of flaws to the agreement that seem abnormal from what I've read here. Honest truth if he has to keep paying then well he has to keep paying, that's life and we'll manage. And obviously there's no question that he has to provide for child support for quite some time still lol.
    That is a common thing I see posted here. "If I had known then what I have since learned here, things would be better."

    Then there is

    Originally posted by MovingOn123 View Post
    I wish I had made sure the SS never went past 2016. But now realize in order for it to stop, I would have to bring it back for review. I honestly believed that it meant it was going to end 2016 - until further research and reading, then I realized I was wrong.
    That is probably the scariest thing about family law and this website. How is it that so many lawyers who sign off as having provided Independent Legal Advice don't do as good a job at advising their clients as we do for posters here? And few of us even have law backgrounds!

    What good is ILA if people still don't understand the flaws in their agreements, and probably won't until they come into play years later? I suppose a good lawyer might say that it isn't their fault when clients don't listen. People hear what they want to hear sometimes. Bad legal advice can be worse than no legal advice at all, but people new to the family law system and going through emotional turmoil have no way to tell which is the bad advice! People trust their lawyers; most are not going to double check on the internet. The problem is that the agreements with no ILA can be reopened and the ones with bad ILA are stuck.

    We really have to get on making that ODF separation agreement template we always talk about.

  • #2
    I agree with you Rio wholeheartedly on this. While I had an excellent lawyer, one very important item was overlooked in my agreement - Life Insurance. We missed that one. The next time my ex takes me back to court I hope my lawyer or I remember to request that.

    Comment


    • #3
      I believe baldclub worked up a fairly comprehensive separation agreement and parenting plan last year. Maybe he would share the finished product with us (of course after removing the personal information)?

      Comment


      • #4
        Agreed. I wrote up my own divorce order, and thought I did a pretty good job (and received compliments on it from experienced family lawyers, who were surprised a "civilian" managed to do such a comprehensive job). But since reading this site, I'm realizing all the things I missed, left out or left ambiguous - some of which have since come back to bite me. Definitely wish I had found this before flying solo.

        Comment


        • #5
          I tried to work out a detailed and complete agreement but kept facing resistance from my lawyer which equalled added expense. My lawyer essentially said that in high conflict situations it was best to leave everything vague and open. This totally goes against what my instinct tells me but bottom line of financing more legal costs had me finally walk away. I very carefully identified the points that were most important to me and made it very clear I was not willing to negotiate. Everything else I walked away from... and am still struggling to find closure on some of those things.

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by smileandwalkaway View Post
            . My lawyer essentially said that in high conflict situations it was best to leave everything vague and open. This totally goes against what my instinct tells me but bottom line of financing more legal costs had me finally walk away.
            That's got to be a contender for worst legal advice ever. Because high-conflict situations magically resolve into co-operation once the divorce judgment is signed and the parties are then able to work everything out over a coffee at Starbucks, like regular people? I got a lot of flak from my ex when I was writing up our divorce order about my "fanatical detailing" of everything. He wanted loose and open. I am very glad I stuck to my guns. I only wish now I had been even more fanatical, seeing the things I overlooked.

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by Rioe View Post
              That is probably the scariest thing about family law and this website. How is it that so many lawyers who sign off as having provided Independent Legal Advice don't do as good a job at advising their clients as we do for posters here? And few of us even have law backgrounds!
              Hi Roie,

              I have pondered the same questions and it all comes down to having to be horizontal to maintain an income for a lawyer and our ability to go very vertical in the subject matter.

              Also, what is formed on this site is very much a "cloud" of knowledge with individual contributors who are very vertical in specific aspects of "family law".

              For example, tayke myself... I focus mainly on aspects of parental child abduction and all other aspects that come along with it. This extends into the subject matters of "status quo" and "jurisdiction" (namely, forum shopping). Then comes custody and access evaluations...

              But, my knowledge primarily is all focused on assisting parents who's children have been abducted by the other parent. If the information I share helps others then it is a double benefit.

              The information I share on "domestic violence" and "abuse" for example is not because I am focused on that area but, as a part of my vertical area of research (child abduction) false allegations of domestic violence often come into the picture.

              I focus on parental child abduction because it is actually an area of law where the most vulnerable members of our society, children, have no voice and are at the most risk to the harmful impacts of a high conflict divorce.

              Hopefully in the new year we (ODF) will have further impact on our system of case law (which we already have) that will drive more needed change in our system of "family law".

              Good Luck!
              Tayken

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by smileandwalkaway View Post
                I tried to work out a detailed and complete agreement but kept facing resistance from my lawyer which equalled added expense. My lawyer essentially said that in high conflict situations it was best to leave everything vague and open. This totally goes against what my instinct tells me but bottom line of financing more legal costs had me finally walk away. I very carefully identified the points that were most important to me and made it very clear I was not willing to negotiate. Everything else I walked away from... and am still struggling to find closure on some of those things.
                Honestly, smileandwalkaway, it is time you "smile and walk away" from your lawyer. In a High Conflict situation agreements are generally very detailed and not ambiguous to END conflict. This is the whole principal behind detailed parallel parenting orders. Anyone who has read case law in the past 3 years knows this... and a lawyer in family law should have been informed of this from the law society courses they are required to take!

                Best you buy this lawyer a copy of William Eddy's books when you release them from their responsibilities representing you to help minimize the impact that this kind of bad advice has on our society too.

                Good Luck!
                Tayken

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by arabian View Post
                  I believe baldclub worked up a fairly comprehensive separation agreement and parenting plan last year. Maybe he would share the finished product with us (of course after removing the personal information)?
                  I really have a template kicking around that I need to clean up and post to the forum. I have been compiling it out of the case files I pull. Mostly, from the OCL and Section 30 reports that I pull from these files.

                  To be very honest with everyone... There are some section 30 evaluators who all use the same cut-and-paste template for their "recommendations" to court on what should be ordered. How do I know this? Well they all have the same freaking paragraphs and none of them bothered to fix the spelling error in a specific recommendation! It is a tell tail sign that all these "professionals" are all just using the same template. (Especially the ones in the Greater Toronto Area. It is really sad when you consider some people pay upwards of 60,000 for an "evaluation" that is a cut-and-paste-template with the same repeated spelling error.)

                  I just need to get my ducks in a row to finish it off... Maybe a new year project.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Sample separation agreement template

                    Originally posted by Tayken View Post
                    I just need to get my ducks in a row to finish it off... Maybe a new year project.
                    In the meantime, first and foremost I urge folks to read the guide here:

                    Critical Issues for Consideration when Developing Practical Parenting Plans For Families in Conflict: A Working Guide


                    I am going to post a TEMPLATE that I've had for a while. I can't recall where exactly it came from but for the greater good, and since there are no names in it, I will post it here.

                    Caution: You need your own good independent legal advice (ILA) to check it out whenever possible.

                    Here goes PART ONE:

                    .................................................. .................................................. ....


                    This is a SHARED PARENTING AGREEMENT made ___________ this day of __________________, 20____


                    NAME OF PARENT 1

                    - And -

                    NAME OF PARENT 2

                    court file No. ____________


                    SUPERIOR COURT OF JUSTICE
                    (Regional Municipality of ....)

                    BETWEEN

                    PARENT 1
                    Petitioner

                    and


                    PARENT 2

                    Respondent



                    PARENTING RESPONSIBILITY DOCUMENT
                    (based on 50/50 parental responsibility)

                    Whereas

                    1) The mother and father were married on January 1, 1999 in Ontario.

                    2) The parties have the following child of their marriage, namely Child , born on January 1, 2000, who currently is 1years of age.

                    3) The parties have lived separate and apart since January 2, 2000.

                    4) Both parties wish their child to have a meaningful and loving relationship with each of the parents. Each parent recognizes that the child will benefit from a positive relationship with the other parent and that the child will benefit if the parents remain committed to shared parenting.
                    Now therefore, the parties acknowledge the following:

                    BASIC PRINCIPLES

                    5) That the child wishes to be able to love and to respect both parents, regardless of the present separation or future marital status of either of the parents and that the separation of the parents should not interfere with the rights of the child to love, be loved and to be parented by both parents.

                    6) That it is essential and in the best interest of the child that the child maintain regular, frequent and healthy contact with both parents.

                    7) That this agreement provides a clear mechanism to help guide the parents, which will result in a reduction in conflict, which is to the best interest of the child.

                    8) That there will be personal sacrifices that the parents will each have to make for the child as a result of their decision to separate. For this reason the parties recognize that the child's welfare is paramount and the child's needs will take precedence over the needs of the parents for the purposes of accommodating the best interest of the child.

                    9) That the child is sensitive to any conflict and bad feelings between the parents.

                    10) That the parents will not allow their disagreements of the past to influence the current situation.

                    11) That any form of activity intended to alienate the child from the other parent is harmful to the children. (Referred to as Parental Alienation).

                    12) That it is in the best interests of the children to have the children spend as much time with family members as possible in preference to care by non family members.

                    13) That equally sharing of costs of responsibilities relating to the children will remove conflict between parents which is in the best interests of the child.

                    14) That reducing child care costs and maximizing tax benefits to the parents is in the best interests of the parents as well as the child.

                    15) That flexibility and co-operation benefits both child and parents.

                    16) That the use of friendly and non adversarial language will reduce conflicts and feelings of hostility between parents and ensure that the child feels that both parents are of equal importance which will be in the best interest of the child.

                    DEFINITIONS

                    17) The following terms in this agreement are defined as following:

                    (a) "Resident Parent" refers to the parent with whom the child is residing, according to the schedule set out in this agreement. During the time that one parent assumes the resident parent role the other parent automatically becomes the non-resident Parent.

                    (b) "Non-Resident Parent" refers to the parent with whom the child is not residing, according to the schedule set out in this agreement. During the time that one parent assumes the non-resident parent role the other parent automatically becomes the resident Parent.

                    (c) "Child" refers to the child listed in paragraph 2 of this agreement who is the child of the husband and wife. If there is more than one child of the marriage then the word "child" in this agreement will be taken to mean children"

                    (d) "Family Law Act" refers to the Family Law Act of Ontario, 1986

                    (e) "Spring Break Holiday" refers to that portion of the calendar year designated as the spring break holiday by the school where the child attends.

                    (f) "School night" refers to the evening immediately preceding a normally scheduled school day at the school that the child attends. For children who are not of school age, this will also apply to the night prior to attendance at a regularly scheduled daycare or babysitting facility.

                    (g) "Christmas holiday period" - refers to that portion of the calendar year that the school where the child attends has designated as the Christmas holiday period

                    (h) "Summer holiday period" refers to that portion of the calendar year that the school where the child attends has designated as the summer holiday period

                    (i) "Long weekend" refers to any weekend where an additional holiday has been added immediately before or after the Saturday and Sunday weekend period as part of a holiday that is generally celebrated by others in the community.

                    (j) "Major Holiday" – a holiday which is at least three days and two nights in length, and which occurs more than 150 KM from home.

                    (k) "Immediate geographical area" – refers to the geographical area within a 200 km radius from the Residential parent's home.

                    (l) "Family Support Persons" – refers to those persons who have been requested to assist the family in complying with this parenting responsibility document and to ensure, to the best of their ability, that the bests interests of the child is being protected. Their duties to include but not limited to such duties as reviewing complaints by either party, providing third party witness to incidents, providing reports or evidence to other parties or to the court, etc.

                    CUSTODY/PARENTING

                    18) Both parents shall be considered equal and shall have equal custody and parental responsibility for the child.

                    RESIDENCY

                    19) The child will reside with each of the parents on a full and equal shared residency basis in accordance to the schedules set under this agreement. Neither of the parent’s homes will be designated a primary residence for the purposes of designating one parent the support payer and one the support recipient.

                    NAME OF THE CHILD

                    20) The name of the child will remain as per birth and will not be changed without the written consent of both parents. This provision shall be deemed to be a bar to any such application and may be filed with and shall be binding upon any officer of the Office of the Registrar General appointed under the Vital Statistics Act who received such application by either party in contravention of this provision.
                    Last edited by baldclub; 01-03-2014, 01:47 PM. Reason: Add title

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Sample separation agreement template

                      PART TWO:



                      JURISDICTION & MOBILITY

                      21) For the sake of consistency and predictability, the parents will do their best to maintain the child’s current residency and parenting arrangements. Should either parent wish to move to a location which may create a situation in which it may not be practical to maintain an equal shared parenting arrangement, and the child is over the age of 8 years of age, then the child will have the choice of which parent she may wish to reside with. Both parents will respect her wishes at that time. Should the child be less than 8 years of age at the time then the residency of the child and parenting arrangements will be determined subject to a full re-assessment of the family situation which is to be done prior to any move of the child.

                      22) Neither parent shall move the child out of the local community of ….., Ontario without the written consent of the other parent.

                      WISHES & PREFERENCES OF THE CHILD

                      23) Both parents will respect the age appropriate wishes and preferences of ******** in regards to matters, such as, the child’s desire to be with certain members of her family, privacy on the phone, etc., providing her wishes are reasonable and consistent to the best interest of the child.

                      PARENTING SCHEDULE

                      24) Except for the circumstances provided for in this agreement, the child shall reside with each of the parents on an equal shared parenting basis in accordance to the parenting schedule attached as "Schedule A". This shall be referred to as the basic parenting schedule and may be changed as circumstances change upon mutual consent of the parties.

                      EDUCATION

                      25) The child will begin her education in the community of …., Ontario and will maintain consistency by attending the designated educational institutions that are in the community of …...

                      CONTACT WITH THE SCHOOL

                      26) Both parents will have equal and unrestricted access to all matters relating to the child’s activities at school, including participation on school outings and activities.

                      27) Both parents will have the equal right to communicate with the school at any time, independently or jointly in order to discuss matters relating to the child.

                      28) Both parents will have the equal right to take the child out of school for reasonable reasons such as, but not limited to, having lunch or to attend special events.

                      DAY CARE

                      29) Currently the child is in daycare and requires babysitting before and after school on some days. The child shall continue with the current daycare provider.

                      30) Arrangements for daycare, including changing of day care providers shall be made jointly and with full consultation with the other parent.

                      DECISION-MAKING

                      31) The resident parent is responsible for making the routine day to day decisions affecting the child during the time that the child is in his/her care.

                      32) All significant decisions relating to the child, not already covered in this parenting agreement will be made jointly by the parties.

                      33) The resident parent may make emergency decisions affecting the child. A reasonable attempt must be made to contact the other parent under such circumstances.

                      34) Should any parent refuse to grant consent in areas where mutual decision making is called for, then this action shall be considered a violation of the intent and spirit of this parenting plan. Such action shall be considered in any future court action regarding a change in custody deemed as warranting modification to the parenting plan

                      TELEPHONE CONTACT BETWEEN PARENTS & CHILD

                      35) The Resident Parent will at all times allow the child to have a reasonable amount of time on the phone at reasonable times with the Non Resident Parent.

                      36) Both parents will respect the child’s privacy while she is on the phone to the other parent and will not annoy or harass the child while she is talking to the other parent.

                      ADMINISTRATION OF DRUGS & ANTIBIOTICS TO CHILD

                      37) Neither parent will permit the prescription of any form of antibiotic to the child without the permission of the other parent or unless prescribed by a doctor in an emergency situation.

                      GENERAL HEALTH & MEDICAL

                      38) Both parents agree that no major medical procedures or operations will be undertaken in relation to the child without joint parental consent, unless in the case of an emergency requiring immediate treatment, as advised by a legally qualified medical practitioner, and that all reasonable efforts be made to contact the other parent.

                      MUTUAL AGREEMENT FOR CHANGES

                      39) The parties may make changes to this parenting responsibility document and have parenting time with the child at any and all times mutually agreed between the parents. Any of the parenting schedules outlined in this agreement may be altered or changed upon mutual consent of both parents.

                      40) Should changing family circumstances or more permanent changes to the parenting responsibility document at the request of the parties require that the parenting document be changed or modified on a more permanent basis, then the parties shall revise the parental responsibility document and have the changes witnessed by a third party. Each party will review the agreement no less than once per year for the purposes of updating the documents to reflect current family conditions.

                      EXTRA CURRICULAR ACTIVITIES

                      41) Both the parents have the right to attend any extra curricular activities that the child may be involved in at any time, whether it is that parent's time to be with the child or not. The Resident Parent will advise the Non Resident Parent of any extra curricular activities that the child may be involved in during parenting time of the Resident Parent so that the Non Resident parent may have the opportunity of attending such activities.

                      42) Neither parent shall schedule time for activities with the child during the other parent’s normal parenting time without the written consent of the other parent.

                      43) The parents agree to share the costs of all extra curricular activities that they mutually agree to have the child participate. These activities and their shared costs are indicated in the budget with this agreement.

                      PARENTING STYLE & CHILD GUIDANCE

                      44) Each parent shall respect the other's parenting style and privacy providing such parenting style does not violate the child’s best interests.

                      45) Both parents agree to cooperate to ensure that there is cooperation in discipline and that neither one of them will allow the child to leave the other parent’s home in order to avoid facing discipline of the other parent’s home.

                      46) The parents will not argue in front of the child and will refrain from making any kind of derogatory comments about the other parent while in the presence of the child. The parents are not to pressure the child to take sides in any issues between the parents.

                      COMMUNICATION BETWEEN PARENTS

                      47) All communication of importance or where a misunderstanding may develop will be by writing, fax, or through a third party.

                      48) Neither parent shall use the child, either directly or indirectly, to take verbal or written messages between the parents unless the messages should involve the child such as communication about the child’s homework, etc.

                      49) Each parent will advise the other parent of any scheduled parent-teacher meetings of the school and community functions in which the child is involved, and any meeting where professionals may be involved. Copies of report cards will be given to the other parent as soon as possible after a report card has been received.

                      50) Each parent will make best efforts to share appropriate information about the child’s schooling and health as well as information about any important events in the child’s life.

                      TRAVEL

                      51) Neither parent will take the child out of the country without the written consent of the other party, such consent not to be unreasonably withheld. In the event that either party is taking the child out of the country they shall give a brief itinerary of travel arrangements.

                      DOCUMENTS

                      52) Neither parent will apply for any passport documents for the child without the prior written consent of the other parent.

                      53) Each party will provide the other party, upon request, the child’s passport and/or birth certificate upon demand of the other should the other parent be traveling outside of the country with the child.

                      54) Each parent will provide the other parent with any documents that may be needed from time to time that may be relevant to the welfare of the child including birth certificates, health care cards, immunization records, etc. Both parents will keep such documents in their possession in a safe and secure place.

                      55) Each parent will have the right to full access to medical, dental, and educational records and information in relation to the child.

                      TRANSPORTATION OF CHILD

                      56) Both parents will share in transportation of the child. Each parent will drop off the child at the end of their parenting period appropriately dressed for the weather.
                      Last edited by Mess; 01-03-2014, 05:07 PM. Reason: remove name

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Sample separation agreement template

                        PART THREE:




                        AVOIDANCE OF LEGAL COSTS

                        57) The parents will take all reasonable steps to avoid litigation which only hurts both parents and diminishes the ability of the parents to provide for the child’s care now and in the future (such as when the child may need post secondary education)

                        CHILD SUPPORT

                        58) Each parent shall contribute a fair amount to the child as agreed in the budget attached as Appendix "B" to this parenting plan. The money will be deposited in a joint chequing account with both parents being allowed to spend their assigned share on the child in accordance to the budget. The parents will mutually decide how to spend any surplus amounts, if any.

                        59) Should, at any time, the parents feel that the budget needs to be modified to take into account for any factor which relates to the support of the child, such as increases or decreases in costs relating to him/her, income of the parents, the budget can be revised by mutual written consent, properly witnessed.

                        DISPUTE RESOLUTION PROCESS

                        60) Should disagreements arise about the child or the terms and conditions contained in this parenting responsibility document, the parties shall attempt resolution of the dispute through alternate dispute resolution process before taking action through the courts. The dispute resolution process shall be open.

                        61) In the event of a dispute, each parent agrees to appoint their own support person to assist them in resolution of any conflict. This person could be anyone outside of the family and may include a professional such as a mediator, counselor or other conflict resolution person. This person will work in cooperation with the other parent’s support person to assist the family resolve their difficulty.

                        62) The parties agree that they will share the costs of any dispute resolution process on an equal 50/50 basis or on a ratio of their respected incomes, whichever is the higher of the two methods for the person who initiated the conflict resolution process.

                        63) That both parents will discuss openly with the conflict resolution persons with a view to work out a mutually satisfactory resolution. If after 60 days, the parents are still unable to agree through a conflict resolution process, then either parent can make an application to the court having relevant jurisdiction to resolve the dispute.

                        64) The conflict resolution person(s) shall file a complete report on the attempt to mediate with the court which will include anything that the they consider relevant to the issues in dispute.

                        CHILD TAX CREDITS

                        65) In order to maximize tax advantages, the parent who can apply the child tax credit for the child in a manner that will result in the greatest tax benefits will claim the child on their personal income tax form.

                        66) Taxes saved as a result of claiming the child on one parent’s personal taxes will be used to benefit the child and will be deposited in the child’s bank account to be kept as savings or to be used at the parties jointly agree. Such monies to be deposited in the child’s account as soon as any tax savings are received.
                        CHILD’S SAVINGS

                        67) Each parent will contribute to the child’s savings plan in accordance to the monthly budget set out in the schedule. Payments will be made monthly - bimonthly - quarterly) by each parent paying directly to the child's account.

                        68) The savings account will be held jointly in the names of the parties. Neither parent will have the right to withdraw any of the money without the consent of the other.

                        MEDICAL EXPENSES

                        69) Each parent will share equally the costs of any necessary medical expenses relating to the child that are not covered as part of any medical plan. Either parent requesting money from the other will provide receipts upon requests for such additional expenses.

                        70) Should either of the parents receive medical insurance coverage through employment for themselves or other members of their family, and this can be used for the child, then each parent will allow use of their plans at no cost to the other parent. Both parents will release to the other parent copies of any medical insurance plan so that the type and extent of coverage can be determined.

                        MISCELLANEOUS

                        71) Each parent will share, equally, any reasonable and necessary expenses relating to the well-being and best interest of the child. Expenses for the child that would be in excess of the amount budgeted for in this agreement will require the mutual prior consent of both parents. Once the parents are in agreement to such expenses then the both parents will contribute to the required expenses as soon as possible. If one parent has been given the authority to spend the money and then to be reimbursed by the other parent, then that parent will upon request provide a receipt to confirm the expenditure for the child.

                        AGREEMENT TO PREVAIL

                        72) This agreement prevails over any matter that is provided for in

                        (a) The Family Law Act

                        (b) Any succeeding legislation and;

                        (c) Any subsequent domestic contract between one of the parties and another person.

                        SEVERABILITY OF TERMS

                        73) Except as otherwise provided, all of the terms of this shared parenting agreement are severable from each other and shall survive the invalidity of any other term of this agreement

                        INDEPENDENT LEGAL ADVICE

                        74) Both parents acknowledge that he or she:

                        (a) Has had spoken to a lawyer and obtained independent legal advice

                        (b) Has read this agreement in its entirety and has full knowledge of the contents

                        (c) Understands his or her respective rights and obligations under this agreement, the nature of the agreement, and the consequences of this agreement.

                        (d) Acknowledges that the terms of this agreement are fair and reasonable

                        (e) Is entering into this agreement without any undue influence, fraud, or coercion whatsoever, and is signing this agreement voluntarily.

                        EXECUTION

                        75) To evidence that both parties are in agreement to the terms and conditions contained in this document, both parties have each signed this document under witness.

                        Dated this ___________ day of _______________, 2000

                        _________________________________ ________________________________
                        Signature of Parent 1 (Witness)



                        Dated this ___________ day of _______________, 2000

                        _________________________________ ________________________________
                        Signature of parent 2 (Witness)
                        Last edited by baldclub; 01-03-2014, 01:48 PM. Reason: Add title

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Hi baldclub. I think it's great you posted this. I recall you put considerable time into creating it.

                          How have things gone for you? Is your ex abiding by the rules?

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            In my personal experience, when sitting down with the other party, the children's lawyer and the judge, all three said my own particular separation agreement proposal was too detailed.

                            My understanding was in a high conflict situation, leave nothing to chance or risk exposing yourself to more conflict. Yet none of them had a solid alternative, go figure.

                            My ex eventually months later proposed something in the eleventh hour, afternoon before trial, which mirrored mine somewhat but was still pretty inconsistent. I didn't worry too much about it though as long as key sections were detailed such as equal parenting, shared residence and a detailed access schedule. I didn't care about some of the unnecessary negative digs against me, I was there to compromise on everything except the aforementioned equal parenting and shared residence points.

                            In the best interest of the children, that compromise happened. I still don't know to this day why exactly it had to take almost five years.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by arabian View Post
                              Hi baldclub. I think it's great you posted this. I recall you put considerable time into creating it.

                              How have things gone for you? Is your ex abiding by the rules?
                              No problem. It did take time, Arabian, but that is how you learn to deal with your situation from every possible angle, in the children's best interest.

                              No, she does not abide by it all the time. I look at the big picture, I take a deep breath and carry on. The kids are extremely pleased with it and it's been nothing but positive for them.

                              Thanks for your comments.

                              Comment

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