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Old 05-13-2011, 02:26 PM
anotherSTEPmother anotherSTEPmother is offline
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I feel that this is going to be an extremely challenging process. Firstly I think it is great you do not want to tear your daughter out of her school and everything. Something I am sure that she will appreciate.

I will say that in our situation the drive was just over an hour on opposite sides of Toronto, which means over 2 hours sometimes in rush hour.

Regardless my stepson who was 5 at the time told the OCL the very same thing, that he wanted to spend more time with dad. However same thing with the distance weeknights for the child and an employed parent is tough.

They settled for my stepson being with my partner the first 3 weekends of each month and him spending the rest with mom. This seems to work good because mom still gets weekends too which I think is important to their relationship too.

This is complicated though because holidays tend to be at the beginning of the month which complicated this more. I have heard a 3 of 4 weekends as well where the non-custodial parents gets 3 in a row then custodial gets one. I think that might be better too.

One thing to expect in the near future is for your 12 year old daughter to want to be spending more of her weekend time with friends. Wait until 14!

That being said my partner and I have spent years trying to figure out how to make this easier on my stepson and have come to the conclusion it is just time to move out to where mom is. This is not for everyone, and a risk as mom in this situation tends to move a lot but what an improvement in quality of life for the child!