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Old 05-20-2006, 01:23 PM
Divorcemanagement Divorcemanagement is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Calgary
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Hi Jlalex - I posted the following in a similar thread - might be helpful.

It's easy to feel trapped and I certainly sympathize with your situation. If your lawyer feels that you are undermining him/her, then it's a good idea to reel in your lawyer's approach so that you can determine if it resembles yours. When my colleague and I are coaching our clients on how to manage their lawyer, we are always amazed by how most people are intimidated by their lawyer's role. From our perspective, divorce is intimidating enough and you need to feel that your lawyer is responding to your needs.

So here are some basic rules:

1) Does your lawyer immediately send you copies of all correspondence with opposing counsel?
2) Is your lawyer's case management exceptional - meaning how your lawyer is explaining the steps you are both undertaking, does your lawyer look at your relationship as collaborative or not?
3)When your lawyer recommends a course of action, does he/she explain the legal reasoning behind it and any possible likely outcomes?
4) Does your lawyer accept written instructions from you and if not, why?
5) Does your lawyer actively request your instructions or does he/she simply state, "here's what we're going to do next"

It's your money and it's your life. Yes divorce is expensive, you have every right to take steps that will minimize your legal fees. So here is a question to ask your lawyer:

"What kinds of steps do you as my lawyer recommend that we take to reduce conflict, reduce legal fees and promote settlement?"

If you get a mushy answer - get a different lawyer.