Thread: Mediation
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Old 10-08-2008, 05:32 PM
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Maggie82 Maggie82 is offline
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Chinyuk, in a nutshell, this is our story:

Year 1 - Year 2: We tried to settle things with bio-mom and her family... to no avail.
Year 3 - Year 4: We tried to settle things in mediation, with 3 different mediatiors (even a high-conflict mediator)... to no avail, despite there being several drafts of "agreements."
Year 5 - Year 6: We began the legal process by communicating through lawyers and having sit-down meetings with our respective lawyers, trying desperately to come to an agreement of some sort. Once again, nothing got resolved, even after we fired/hired a couple lawyers.
Year 7: We couldn't take the bio-mom making unitateral changes on whims anymore, and not being able to do anything about it, and took the matter to court. We had our first court date a month after doing the paperwork. From our first court appearance, until we had a final order in place, it took 3 months.

We are happy with our court order because it is fair. We were treated very fairly by the judge (we were lucky in that sense) and the judge made us compromise on issues we felt strongly about. Other issues that we couldn't agree on, he simply ordered them to both parties equally.

We were very happy with the order when we got it. Now, a year later, there are a few minor details that we would like to change... but only with the issues that we "compromised" on or that were ordered based on the situation at the time (and our current situation is different). However, it's still better than not having an agreement/order at all.

Hope this helps. If you have any questions, feel free to message me!