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What to do when Sep. Agreement just doesn't get followed

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  • What to do when Sep. Agreement just doesn't get followed

    So my separation agreement might as well be written in invisible ink because my ex doesn't follow half of what's written in there .

    How do you handle it when :

    the exchange of children is supposed to happen at 330 pm every Friday and they sometimes drop them off at 11 am instead or pick them up at 5 pm instead .

    Also been burned when verbally told they will pay half for a Section 7 expense and then afterwards says , you don't have it in writing so forget it

    The agreement says we will live in the same neighborhood and then they secretly move 40 minutes away

    they agree to put the child in a sport and then refuse to bring the child

    So frustrating

  • #2
    Sens19 I don’t have answers but am interested as I expect to be in your shoes fairly shortly.
    I will say that your kids will note your continued respectful behaviour and they deserve at least 1 good model of same. Play the long game, act with integrity and everything will turn out alright.

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by sens19 View Post
      So my separation agreement might as well be written in invisible ink because my ex doesn't follow half of what's written in there .

      How do you handle it when :

      the exchange of children is supposed to happen at 330 pm every Friday and they sometimes drop them off at 11 am instead or pick them up at 5 pm instead .
      Ask them to respect the drop off/pick up time. If they are expected at 3:30 then be available at 3:30 and not earlier. If they are to be picked up at 5:00 then have them ready for 5:00 and not earlier or later. A few instances of trying to drop off when you are not there, or pickup when you are not there and having to make two trips should curb that issue fairly quickly.

      Also been burned when verbally told they will pay half for a Section 7 expense and then afterwards says , you don't have it in writing so forget it
      Always get it in writing. Send the request via email and get the response via email.

      The agreement says we will live in the same neighborhood and then they secretly move 40 minutes away
      If it doesn't impact the kids or their activities etc then don't worry about it. If they are creating more drive time for themselves then that's their problem.

      they agree to put the child in a sport and then refuse to bring the child
      You can't force them to, ultimately it's up to them to decide what they do with the kids on their time.

      Comment


      • #4
        Unfortunately, there isn't a lot to do unless you want to go back to court. There will likely be no resolution as most of your issues are somewhat minor annoyances.

        I would try to be firm, stand your ground and let them waste a few trips. Don't be a doormat, but also be a good role model for your kids. Hope things get better.

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        • #5
          You need to deal with the secret move now. If your order states the children shall reside in a certain school district then that’s where they reside. The other parent can live in Timbuktu. But the children stay in the school district.

          One day it’s a secret move 40 mins away, next it’s another 10 mins away. But hey you said it was okay last time so what’s the problem. Suddenly the parent can’t drive the distance, so can you come pick up. It’s a short road to disaster.

          Go get it fixed now. The other stuff can get sorted out but the move issue is important to deal with.

          Comment


          • #6
            Yes I should have filed papers against the move as well but I am sure it is too late now .

            I cannot afford a lawyer anyways

            Comment

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