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why can't I leave the house

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  • why can't I leave the house

    My common law wife and I are separating after 3 years with 2 kids. We bought a house, both names on the mortgage. Everone says "don't leave the house", but I don't get it. If I am content to let her take primary custody of the children, and I know I will continue to be very involved in helping (since we both work full time but she works shift and wants me to care for them while she's working), should I still stay in the house when we both want a separation?
    Is there a financial reason I should not leave the house, or does that relate only to custody?
    Why should I not leave our house? I think I will still have a right to my half of its value whether I leave first or not, won't I?

  • #2
    Its not for what things are right now, it for what things might be in future. If you must leave make sure you have a well written and notarized separation agreement in place.

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    • #3
      Things may be going well now, as was the case for my partner. He left the house and that was 2 years ago, he still has none of his possessions and his ex was given "exclusive possession" of the home. She renewed the mortgage without his approval and is not keeping the home in proper condition. When he left it was what he thought was the "right thing to do" and they were still on good terms. Now 2 years later he still has nothing and she has it all and it looks like she is going to get the house as a part of the settlement. Stay put for as long as possible or like singledad said make sure you have a 100% legal agreement in place about the home before you leave it or you may never get what is yours.

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      • #4
        Exactly, what people say today is as often as not, not what they will do tomorrow. Get the written and notarized agreement in place and then leave.

        Cardinal sin #1 is leaving the house without the kids or an agreeement in place. Damn straight. Leave at your own risk.

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