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Old 05-15-2010, 04:02 PM
mom2three mom2three is offline
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Advice? Given what you have described, I would personally leave well enough alone at the present moment. As you state, you have both been able to discuss finances amicably, without the advice of lawyers up to now.

While some of the decisions you made were not wise ones, we don't get compensated for our unwise choices. It was you who chose to pay spousal support for ten years. A contract is a contract. Can you not negotiate the spousal support down, explaining AMICABLY the present circumstances with your ex?

As for the child support, I would leave that well enough alone and would not entertain the thought of bringing the support down. I personally think it would cost you more in legal fees and acrimony and headaches for what you "might" ultimately save. IF it had been the ex who made the move, then absolutely you should fight for a reduction in child support. But, it was you who moved, not her. You could easily say you had no choice, but thems the breaks sometimes. Life ain't always fair.

If you put the actual cost savings vs. legal costs to argue both these points, I bet you will come up with a number not in your favour, regardless of whether or not you win. Add to that the acrimony that will develop amongst the parents of two children who have worked amicably together for several years. Is it worth it? I don't think so but that is something personal that YOU have to decide. It ain't always about saving a nickel.