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  • post valuation - joint expenses to cover day to day expenses.

    The following explains how we did things after valuation date (we or at least I tried to do things status quo - and now - to have one person brunt "the full bill" to keep our family going is not right - but there must be someone else here who had similar issues??? (can't email her now at this point either)

    I was wondering how others ended up figuring out, or how to divide the post valuation date bills when one of the spouses did not work after a long term marriage (like a stay at home parent or for me not able to work). Although we verbally agreeed "and shook on it" her word was not good for a whole lot in the end. I admit my ex brought the vast majority of the income into the house since I went on CPP - So here goes:

    we stayed in the house. We lived our married lives by pooling whatever income we brought in (80% the ex - 20% my CPP disability the last few years), into the same one "joint pay the bills" checking account and whatever was left was saved by transfering that extra money into a seperated mutual fund account. My credit card was joint with my ex (she had joint signing authority on all my financials (this allowed her to get funds transfered, bills paid - what ever needed to be done over all those years my physical health went up and down - end of the old story.....)

    We always set up as many monthly bills to funnelled through "my" joint credit card and made one big monthly payment (remember she is joint, and has her own card as well) so this continued (I would call these types of charges as family expenditures to keep the house operating). We had the house insurance, car insurance, the kids car insurance, cable, dentist, groceries, my son charged his personal car insurance on as well. The "family car" gasoline, oil, maintenance again to which I personally used very little to get to my doctor appointments (10% me 10 % the ex, 30% family business and the remaining 50% the kids). Oh and I suppose a special - charges for 100% refundable from the ex's insurance benefit - payment on the card, check to the ex in the mail - untill the very end the check was deposited to pay the bill so "it would be a wash".

    If the card is a joint card what is the right way to brake these charges down after the valuation date? First off lawyer said whomever is the main account or card holder but in our case where we really did live the joint "life" untill 6 months later and we stopped using the joint account and things well just got worse but that is another problem.

  • #2
    ddol-We still have our joint LOC and we each match each other with monthly payments into it. We had it changed so it can only be paid upon directly at the bank. All withdrawals have been ceased. The lawyer said I can't change one the cars yet to my exes name (both are in my name) as I can use it for leverage...we both split the car insurance as well equally. I haven't had any problems with neither one of us paying. Sorry-not much help.

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    • #3
      all the peieces make the whole. a few people have spoke to me in recent with the common theme - there is nothing to negotiate as you you can only do this with reason - the ex has none. I know in my case to communicate is like giving her the next step...... Up to now I have taken on some of the risk with both cars being mine and the daughters using the second one. The ex kept the insurance going but naturally nobody confirmed to me that indeed the ex's last move was to let her driver's license to expire Friday. She was coving the insurance.... even now - I know she needs to give thirty days but my new address may end the coverage. But even that will now change as i do not think she can be insured without the license. I tried to get some form of plan/understanding with my daughter who is driving that 2nd car, she has very little grasp on what is happening. Yes the plan is to sign it over but we both have to be set up with our new insurance before I can sign. Her last comment was the 22nd.... left me no time to figure anything out.

      I see the lawyer on Tuesday and I shall ask him the best next move - but if I sign over the car the ex's next move is cut me off - i only have so much money flowing without any support going. So the youngest has no clue and I am not about to fill in the blanks (I will be the heavy this I do know). I am most worried about my personal items in the house - the ex and her reaction when she is handed the first set of papers and the request for support..... I imagine support will not just be thrust onto her. But I can see her going balistic and then destroying/ selling the most important things to me.

      not much about pricing stuff here! Serious it has been one of those weeks for me - I try so hard and nothing comes out of the effort - so this time it was my legs taking off and my needles this round (2 of them anyway) day 4 now and I can hardly move...... but this will end but this morning I was really thinking my body just will not give in - too bad it talls me this through hurting...(ok pain!). I heard I get to do whatever I can. divorce lawyer on tuesday, legal lawyer/court wednsday......

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