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  • Figuring out the Bill

    Today I received the final money held in the divorce trust along with the invoice of what I owe that I've been requesting for over a year. The statement says the "Total Legal Fees" are $14,500. That is the exact amount she kept from the divorce trust fund before she sent me the remainder (I gave permission for that). The statement does not state I gave $1,500 retainer. Did she keep too much? It would seem it would say the Total bill was $16K if she kept $14.5K

    I don't trust her. She shorted my ex about $1,000 the court ordered her to pay him. She told him he could stay one more day in the house after he was court evicted but she told him he had to give me jewelry worth $2K (which i didn't know about until I was given the ring). She was court ordered to pay the final settlement by December 1 and was 2 months late. She fired me as a client (but wrote the order so her firm would manage the trust); but "forgot" to send me the court order she'd been removed and let me know 4 days before the final trial that I'd be representing myself. I could go on and on about how she messed up; but will save the rest for the Legal Society or Court to decide.

    I just didn't know if this was another mess up on her part or if that's how legal bills are written.

    Thanks for any help on figuring out if she messed up again.

    Hephzibah

  • #2
    not sure how to post new thread re disney dad

    how do you compete against a disney dad who showers gifts, 6th trip now to panama in 6 months, fancy labelled clothes , diamnods opal earrings

    with my child custody money

    Comment


    • #3
      Use the 'new topic' button at the top left of any forum.

      And to answer your question, you don't. Parenting isn't a competition and it isn't about what material things you can give them. A trip to disneyland isn't going to help them with their homework, fancy earrings won't hug them when they have a broken heart and designer clothes don't make them feel any better when they're sick.

      Be the best mom you can be for them, always speak favourably about their dad - especially to them, make sure they know you love them and are always there for them no matter how badly they screw up. The flash and dazzle may win them over for a while however as they mature so will their values, but it's your job to be a good teacher.

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      • #4
        how long does the razzle/dazzle last?

        they did not see me this WE as they are skiing. no one told me.
        last WE saw new diamond earrings in her ears. she did not have her ears pierced a few months ago. It is fun over there. As a private school, grades are upheld by "adjustment"
        Teachers are complaining of assingmetns handed in late but still graded fully, marks are removed if they are bad or tests are redone. Even so the math grade dropped 15% and for a kid who never studied for math, was recommended to get extra hlep
        no chores over there
        Her dad just new snowboard/boats this weekend and they are now up there now
        so when does reality set in? I cannot compete if she is not here?
        ideas?

        Comment


        • #5
          Again, you aren't intended to compete for her affections. Be the best parent you can be for her and that's all you can do. There is no timeline that says "ex spouse is entitled to act like an ass for 6 months post seperation, then all must return to normal".

          Perhaps spend less time focussing on all the things you think he is doing wrong and more on what you do right for her. She shouldn't feel like you're playing tug of war over her, the parent who pulls the hardest usually loses.

          Your situation requires a lot of patience on your part and swallowing hurt feeling while she tests out all kinds of boundaries. It's what kids do, be patient, be there for her.

          Comment

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