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Old 10-04-2010, 11:44 AM
frustratedwithex frustratedwithex is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 504
frustratedwithex is an unknown quantity at this point

Do not wait and see what happens! Do some research, and find out what you need.

Your approach of,” I don’t want much but I don’t want to be left living a lesser life”, is not going to serve you well.

My situation is very similar to yours, and I have been very naïve believing my ex. when he said he would treat me fairly. The reality is very different. Because of age, no established career, trying to get some education (that I am paying for), so I can get some sort of income in order to support myself (at a minimal level), means what he believes to be fair, is anything but. When all is said and done, the difference in our current and future incomes is vast, and time is against me. I don’t have 25 years, (as he has had) to establish and advance a career. I can get a job, I’m not trying to avoid that, but it is highly unlikely I will ever come close to what his career pays.

My lawyer tried to point all of this out to me, and I continued to believe, as you do, that I don’t want much, just don’t want to retire and live in poverty. Until I saw a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst (CDFA™), I did not fully understand how the division of assets would affect me in the future. Whatever deal he is trying to sell to you is in his best interest, not yours. You are vulnerable right now and maybe confused.

billm has given some very good suggestions, that would be a good place to start. You need some financial support, and you will need to find out what that looks like.