Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Suing in Civil Court for Mental anguish secondary to emotional abuse of children

Collapse
This topic is closed.
X
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • #46
    Originally posted by DowntroddenDad View Post
    I hate to join the Pile on, but I will bring up another point.

    I had a long term GF who was not as aggressive as the OP, but had similar feelings that I was not aggresive enough in seeking my rights under the SA. She also didn't like the idea that I was conceding the point about my spousal support being indefinite. She crossed the line between being supportive to being critical.

    It wasn't the only factor, but it was a factor in the reasons why I felt the relationship had to end.
    Experienced that myself, I can totally relate to what you're saying DowntroddenDad. As a matter of fact, it got so bad that I began to worry more about her than what my ex was going to pull! A real tragedy as I miss her young girls who really got along well with my kids, but that relationship had to end.

    Comment


    • #47
      Would a claim of being an in loco parentis even be applicable to a step-parent in the matter?
      A very interesting point.

      A litigation guardian, in broad strokes, is usually a mother, father or legal guardian of a young person, or an adult willing to act as a Litigation Guardian can be a Litigation Guardian.

      A finding that someone is in loco parentis is intended to give them both the rights and responsibilities of being a parent. In most cases, this is looked at as being strictly a child support obligation post-separation. However, prior to separation, my opinion is that they would be given standing as a litigation guardian.

      In the OPs situation, there are a number of issues that crop up:
      - Litigation between child and parent, when the child is under the parent's care, is generally frowned upon. The reason for this is you are paying yourself out of your own pocket, effectively - unless that pocket is insured, in which case the insurance company will be very unimpressed.
      - Who has better standing to be the litigation guardian?
      - Conflict of interests (if the case were not thrown out, I imagine the OCL would need to be appointed as litigation guardian).
      - Any gains would be the children's, to be held in trust. The OP would have no say in how the funds were used.

      Comment


      • #48
        Originally posted by Tayken View Post
        Do you know what "financial abuse" and "legal abuse" are? You have admitted against interest to this public message board that you are willing and seeking advice to financially abuse and legally abuse someone. This in my opinion is almost criminal and could be considered if brought forward to the Crown Attorney as criminal harassment through the courts.

        Please, for the sake of those who have real issues and are not seeking vengeance to "financially pressure" someone which is FINANCIAL ABUSE, beyond a reasonable doubt, consider your conduct.
        This is a very interesting post Tayken. I've been searching around the Criminal Code of Canada and the internet, there seems to be references to financial abuse, in particular in regards to seniors:

        What is financial abuse?

        Financial abuse is defined as the misuse of a person's funds and assets; obtaining property and funds without his/her knowledge and full consent or, in the case of an elderly person who is not competent, in a way not in his/her best interests. It is also known as material abuse.

        Abuse can include:
        -- Misusing a power of attorney;
        -- Persuading, tricking or threatening the adult out of money, property, or possessions (and this includes attempts at any of these);
        -- Cashing pension or other cheques without authorization;
        -- Use of the adult's money for purposes other than what was intended by the adult;
        -- Pressuring older adults to move from, sell or relinquish their home or other personal property; make or change a will; sign legal documents they do not fully understand; change or keep their marital status; give money to relatives or caregivers; engage in paid work to bring in extra money; or care for children or grandchildren.



        More about harassment: 264. Criminal harassment | Criminal Code of Canada


        264. Criminal harassment
        264. (1) No person shall, without lawful authority and knowing that another person is harassed or recklessly as to whether the other person is harassed, engage in conduct referred to in subsection (2) that causes that other person reasonably, in all the circumstances, to fear for their safety or the safety of anyone known to them.

        Prohibited conduct

        (2) The conduct mentioned in subsection (1) consists of

        (a) repeatedly following from place to place the other person or anyone known to them;
        (b) repeatedly communicating with, either directly or indirectly, the other person or anyone known to them;
        (c) besetting or watching the dwelling-house, or place where the other person, or anyone known to them, resides, works, carries on business or happens to be; or
        (d) engaging in threatening conduct directed at the other person or any member of their family.

        Punishment

        (3) Every person who contravenes this section is guilty of

        (a) an indictable offence and is liable to imprisonment for a term not exceeding ten years; or
        (b) an offence punishable on summary conviction.

        Factors to be considered

        (4) Where a person is convicted of an offence under this section, the court imposing the sentence on the person shall consider as an aggravating factor that, at the time the offence was committed, the person contravened

        (a) the terms or conditions of an order made pursuant to section 161 or a recognizance entered into pursuant to section 810, 810.1 or 810.2; or
        (b) the terms or conditions of any other order or recognizance made or entered into under the common law or a provision of this or any other Act of Parliament or of a province that is similar in effect to an order or recognizance referred to in paragraph (a).


        .................................................. ................................................

        I'm not sure that either financial abuse or harassment would apply here but others might have more perspective than me. Still looking for references to "legal abuse".

        More examples of abuse here: Criminal Code Offences

        Comment


        • #49
          Legal abuse - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

          Comment


          • #50
            Under Tort Law

            Best example: Abuse of process (Abuse of process - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia) or maybe malicious prosecution (Malicious prosecution - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia).

            I know, I know, it's wikipedia, but there are references.

            Comment


            • #51
              anger has blocked my good judgement

              Originally posted by Mess View Post
              Yes they have.


              This falls under my definition of a personal attack. It's fine to disagree with the OP and give opinions on why the case has no merit. The type of person the OP is has no relevance to answering the question.
              Thank you for moderating...I agree

              "I cant help but wonder if this woman is the alienating factor in the children's life?It seems that SHE is paying for counsellors etc Maybe children are having problems with her ,and her constant need for validation and her demands to be loved and admired.Trust me Im a medical student?Really?Destroying the competition is her answer to the problem."

              again..please...
              What is the purpose of this above comment? Perhaps you could ask me.
              What is purpose of the above post? to shame?

              First of all, you guys are the harshest group I have ever encountered.

              I have read all the posts and links offered. I am not sure how many of you have been falsely accused of child abuse here, or gone through rejection of a child or children but brings out the worst in a person. Thank you for providing feedback through it has helped me see more clearly.

              My partner has joint custody, but we have choosen not to motion to force visitiation because the ex has made the situation so high conflict. We are waiting on the OCL report. We have been asking for theraputic intervention repeatedly When things started to escalate, the ex tried to get the children into counseling without including the father (my partner) so he refused to agree...other names of counselors were sent...she did not respond...but accuses us of blocking counseling. She has refused mediation that HER lawyer suggested. There is NO mediating in the situation. This situation needs court intervention.

              In the past 2 years prior to last year, the children loved coming to our home, and I did have a mentoring relationship with the children, including teaching them to ride horses, doing barn chores, teaching them to care for animals until of course it became unsafe all of a sudden (I am a certified coach) and at no time was the activity unsafe,I give this as an example because both my partner and I have been stripped of mentoring the kids, and parenting them and then have been told we are emotionally abusing them...

              Once the false accusations started, my partner and I tried to discuss the issues when the lawyers got involved the strong allegations subsided to "the children do not like "..."they are allowed to choose if they want to attend vistation"..we know this is not looked at by the courts well..but at this time there was nothing we could do......(these things were said by the ex, not the kids them selves, they said the opposite)..

              5 months ago, the ex demanded that my partner has to choose between me and his kids (the ex's words)..move out of the current living arrangement if he wanted to see is kids...when he refused..the ex said "its a shame the children feel so rejected that you have choosen this"

              I did not try to take over the mother role, and I did not attempt to discipline the kids I left that to their father and mother.

              There has been repeated threats to me, taped threats over the phone.. publicly both my partner and I have been treated as though we are unsafe and dangerous..the children are escorted off the field from soccer because we attended recently. The police were called and the officer told we might think about stop attending since the children did not want us there. We no longer attend any activities. The slander and liable was extended into my work place at the hospital and into the wider community.

              The youngest child use to call from the bathroom secretly to talk but she has stopped calling. This children loved being with us..and we loved having them. They still post stuff on FB for us to see.

              I have realized that its possible when dealing with a crazy person..you start to act crazy as well.


              I can see from the feedback that ..my anger has blocked my good judgement.

              At times I think the best thing to do is walk away from the relationship. I do love my partner but perhaps I am doing more harm than good and I am unable to handle watching child abuse so close up.

              The youngest has recently told my partner that he is no longer her dad, and now considered her step dad as her father.

              I realize you many not know we are not unsafe, demanding attention and love, money hungry, people. But the truth is we are not. hopefully one day the children will understand what is really going on. In a perfect world, I think the mother needs to be held accountable for her actions..but perhaps not in this life time.

              As she has told everyone, including her children "no judge, no lawyer is going to tell me what to do"...and guess what..SHE IS RIGHT. Because it seems she is pulling the wool over everyones eyes.

              Comment


              • #52
                no one is saying that you have to end the relationship with your partner. What they are saying is that you need to step back and keep out of it. Let the father and his kids have some alone time together.

                You keep calling him your partner but not your husband. Are you married??

                Comment


                • #53
                  engaged...as of last month. common law for almost 3 years.

                  Comment


                  • #54
                    Originally posted by standing on the sidelines View Post
                    no one is saying that you have to end the relationship with your partner. What they are saying is that you need to step back and keep out of it. Let the father and his kids have some alone time together.



                    You keep calling him your partner but not your husband. Are you married??
                    He has no access currently (no court order)...settlement conference in Jan
                    more than happy to give them space.
                    engaged..common law 3 years.

                    Comment


                    • #55
                      First of all, you guys are the harshest group I have ever encountered.
                      Wait until you go to court and the judge can make rulings. If you think this forum is tough... At least the advice/comments on here are free.

                      It's good to read that you have been able to re-read your posts and how it affected others (including my own) comments.

                      There are always two sides to a storey.

                      My suggestion is if the other party is slandering you- ignore it as best you can. People will see through it if it's not valid.

                      Best of luck.

                      Comment


                      • #56
                        I won't apologise for being critical of the idea of suing. That I think is the worst thing to do, if the goal is to encourage the children to see you and your ex. I think his ex loves conflict and this would just add fuel to the fire.

                        I can't speak for the others, I was not judging you as a person, or your actions with your ex and his children.

                        Just because interference in my issues was a cause (not the only one) in my breakup with my GF, doesn't mean you should bow out of your relationship. No doubt in my mind that if you weren't around the ex would still find something to bring up.

                        The best thing to do, and it is hard to hear this, is to continue to reach out to the children and ignore the ex. They won't get it immediately, but they will eventually.

                        Comment


                        • #57
                          My advice is simple: back off and let your husband handle this with his ex wife. It is not your place to be involved legally in this matter. Your relationship with your husband is separate from his relationship with his children and his ex. If/when the children reunite with their father give them space/time alone with their father. Remember, the kids came many years before you. Your position is to be supportive to your ex. That certainly doesn't mean launching litigation against his ex on his behalf. Being a step-parent can't be easy. You have to know your limitations. It sounds as though you had a good relationship at one time with his children. If they want a relationship with you in the future let them come to you. You have no idea what stresses they have in their lives. Let it go.

                          Comment


                          • #58
                            Originally posted by DowntroddenDad View Post
                            The best thing to do, and it is hard to hear this, is to continue to reach out to the children and ignore the ex. They won't get it immediately, but they will eventually.
                            I have texted the youngest to ask if she wants me to send her a birthday gift and after months of telling me she does not want me to text her she said "yes that would be nice"

                            Thanks for your input.

                            Comment

                            Our Divorce Forums
                            Forums dedicated to helping people all across Canada get through the separation and divorce process, with discussions about legal issues, parenting issues, financial issues and more.
                            Working...
                            X