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Old 12-10-2009, 04:13 PM
NoahsDaddy NoahsDaddy is offline
Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 34
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Originally Posted by scared1 View Post
Ontario Association for Family Mediation: Making your decision
Try a mediator. I am trying to get my ex into one there now.Why can't people eb civil?
Money has a funny way of removing any sort of civility between people.

#1Stepmom - I've read many of your posts on here and your husband does not seem to be dealing with someone who's working with a full deck of cards here. I feel sorry for him and can relate to some of the things you and he continue to go through...I've been there before too.

Mediator is a good idea if you have two people that somewhat get along but can't seem to agree on one or two things. However, a mediator (and I've used one already) will not make decisions for the two of you...the owness is on you and your ex to do that together.

From the sounds of it, the ex is doing everything possible to be difficult. With that being said, I'm not sure that a mediator is the best route to go. If only one person is going to go into the mediation with an open-mind, while the other person is completely uncooperative and disengaged, it's a colossal waste of time and money. It would be different if the mediator could make final orders, but, that's not the purpose that they serve.

Seriously though, this type of stuff is asinine. Does the ex have any vacation time with the child? If so, does she pay the full daycare cost during same? Or does she expect the father to still contribute his proportionate share? If people could be rational, you'd think they'd realize that crap like this (at the end of the day) most often just comes out in the wash anyways. How much money are we talking about here?

If she's going to deny him his court ordered vacation time, bottom line, she is in contempt of the court order...and, eventually, the courts will have little to no patience for this behaviour. File an emergency motion and have her straightened out. You can't use time with a child to blackmail someone for more money; that is essentially what she is doing here.