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  • Denying access to matrimonial home

    Wondering what my rights are as far as having access to the matrimonial home. I have moved out with the kids, my STBX is living in our house. He works out of town and is not around. There are some baby items that I forgot to grab and need to get. I asked my STBX if I could go to the house to grab some baby items and I would check on it, since no one is up there and it is very remote. He say no, he doesn't want me up there. Does he have the right to deny me?

  • #2
    You could contact your local RCMP attachment and have them call your ex to request access on your behalf to retrieve personal belongings. You should be prepared to provide a list of items you would like to retrieve for the police. This way you won't face any bogus B&E charges. As your ex isn't always in residence he can have someone at the home when you go to collect your things. This way it's all fair and no one can accuse the other of any impropriety.

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    • #3
      Thanks. What if I just want to check on the house, and don't remove any items? For insurance, someone needs to be checking in, and as we determined we will be listing it, I want to make sure its ok. Would it be considered b&e when you have a key and own the home? Maybe I should wait until I speak to my lawyer about it.

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      • #4
        Originally posted by Braj19 View Post
        Thanks. What if I just want to check on the house, and don't remove any items? For insurance, someone needs to be checking in, and as we determined we will be listing it, I want to make sure its ok. Would it be considered b&e when you have a key and own the home? Maybe I should wait until I speak to my lawyer about it.
        I would wait and talk to your lawyer. Its a real grey area for you as you moved out and he has been paying all the bills. He can say that you came in and removed items that didnt belong to you or did damage to the house. Best to wait and not take any chances.

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        • #5
          Not clear where you are located, laws vary province to province.

          You were married and the house was the matrimonial home. You are co-owner regardless of who's name is on the title. You have a right to reasonable access to gather your belongings and to check on the state of the property.

          You may have a possible right to move back in, but since some time has passed and you have a new address (if you are staying with relatives or in a motel or shelter that would be different) he would have cause to seek sole possession or possibly a restraining order if it turned into a conflict.

          In the meantime he has a right to privacy and the security of his possessions. So for example if you walked in without any notice and he was in the shower or sleeping, he would have cause to seek a restraining order. All he needs is to say he feels threatened. If you really need the baby's things so desperately, then inform him that you will be making one visit, that he is welcome to call a friend or a neighbour he trusts to be there while you go in to make sure you only gather the child's belongings.

          If you simply go by yourself then you are not trespassing or breaking any laws, but you would be risking him filing a complaint that his property was missing after you were there. There are all kinds of games people play. You should protect yourself by having a witness, and if possible, video tape your entire visit.

          You might want to consider that the father will have access to the child (and he may possibly seek shared custody) and there will overnight visits. So the father will need the child's things as well. You don't have a strong argument to take everything.

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