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Old 03-31-2010, 11:58 PM
Miss.Stepmom Miss.Stepmom is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Ontario
Posts: 27
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1. Shared Parenting:The most important thing is to show the judge how important you BOTH are to this child and that you believe it is in the best interests of your daughter. The status quo right now is from you living together, BUT you need to get more access immediately, so you should be filing a temporary motion for MORE access while your case is moving through the judical process. Get a template off Google for a Parenting Plan. I self represented and it was very beneficial. Judges want to know you have a plan.

2. Spousal & Mobility: For just the custody what she makes doesn't matter right now at all. You are the Payor because your daughter resides with her. Get the Motion for Temporary Access Immediately before she moves.That way you can bring that up after and if needed do an emergency motion. If you get the temporary access (which you can get easily due to her age and not being in school) that will become the status quo, which is why you should move quickly. When she does try make sure you highlight why the move isn't good for your daughter "This move will also make it very difficult for me to visit my daughter or manage a successful shared parenting arrangement."

3. Self Rep with means: Don't do it!!! To cut down on costs do the paperwork yourself etc, do the footwork. But from experience being a man and self representing yourself is BAD!!!! They don't look favorably upon it because they are stuck between a rock and a hard place. If you don't know what your doing and they explain it, then the other side can say they are showing favoritism. If they don't, you could get mad saying they aren't being sympathetic. It is SOOOO much faster with a lawyer especially if the other party has one. If one party is unrepresented and one isn't the one who is represented has more leeway. If you do represent yourself STUDY STUDY STUDY, get advice from a lawyer and KEEP YOUR COOL!!!

4. Awarding Court Costs: This is really based on who wins. If you were fair and "nice" about the matter they don't tend to order them, however it's mostly based on who won the motion period.

5. Temp Advice: Motions, don't go to a motion without ALL your evidence!!! Make sure anything that you think you may want to bring up is in that motion paper or you won't be able to talk about it. Then anything past the settlement conference. Send a lot of offers to settle. It shows you want to work it out. WHat would be great to do if you can a afford it is draw up all the papers and then have a lawyer review it everytime!!! Then in court if your unsure, advise the judge you don't have representation but you did have a lawyer go over your paperwork so if they could read it if they haven't already done so. In my experience Judges don't read the paperwork in detail They skim it and ask questions.

6. Ex's Lies: Letters, Preferably affidavits from EVERYONE you know. That way you don't have to call her a liar. The judge will be able to ascertain it. Try to back up everything you say with evidence. She says you didn't pay her for something, write an affidavit and attach a signed cashed copy of the cheque from your bank, instead of saying you paid it, etc. Document EVERYTHING!!